Think Like a Man

Time Subtitle Translation
29s From the beginning of mankind and throughout the world's history... 自人类出现以来 纵观世界历史
33s ...there have been clearly defined rituals of manhood. 人类有过许多种明确的成人仪式
35s See, these rituals were definitive... 要知道 正是这些仪式明确定义了
37s ...in determining the exact moment when a boy became a man. 一个男孩在哪一个时刻 成长为了一个男人
45s For example, there's the moment when a boy joins the other men... 片名:像男人一样思考 比如 一个男孩第一次 加入到其他男人中间 进行了他人生中的第一次战斗
49s ...in his first engagement in battle. 进行了他人生中的第一次战斗
50s Did you know they used to have public circumcisions in front of the village? 你们知道古人过去在整个部落前 举行公开割礼吗?
54s Thank God mine didn't go public. 谢天谢地我的割礼不是公开的
56s And the most significant moment of all, marriage. 还有人生中最重大的事 婚姻
59s That's right, I said it. 没错 我说出来了
1:00 In fact, marriage used to be the ultimate goal of boys and men. 事实上婚姻过去 是所有男人的终极目标
1:04 Because in the old days... 因为在那时候
1:05 ...it was the only way a guy could get what he really wanted from a girl. 这是一个男人想从女人那里 得到自己真正想要东西的唯一方式
1:10 See, now, today? Things have changed, people. 而现在呢? 哦 时代不同了
1:13 I mean, men, we don't have to work as hard to get what we want. 我是说我们不需要那么卖力地工作 来满足自己的需求
1:16 We got the Internet, for God's sake. I can be whatever I want on the Internet. 看在上帝份上 我们有网络了 在网上我们可以随心所遇
1:20 Today, men have the home court advantage... 如今 男人们可是有了主场优势
1:23 ...which has left you ladies with several different types of men. 这就给女人提供了几种 不同男人的类型
1:25 I mean, I don't even know where to start. You got the Player. 我的意思是 我不知道从何说起 有花花公子型 (花花公子型)
1:30 Hi, Zekey. You sexted? -嗨 齐克 -你给我发的彩 "性"?
1:34 -Those aren't mine, asshole. -You sure that's not.... -那不是我的 你这混蛋 -你确定不是?
1:37 Wait a minute, I'm not done. You got the Mama's Boy. 等一下 我没说完呢 还有妈咪宝贝型… (妈咪宝贝型)
1:40 Happy, Valentine's Day, sweetie. 情人节快乐 亲爱的
1:43 And you too, Mom. 妈妈 情人节快乐
1:46 Thank you, sweetie. 谢谢你啦 乖宝贝
1:48 I think I'm just gonna leave you two alone. 我觉得我还是给你们俩留点空间吧
1:50 Wait, where are you going? 等等 你要去哪?
1:51 It's okay, Michael. I don't want to intrude. 没关系的 迈克尔 我不想当电灯泡
1:54 -I'll call you? -Or not. -我等会儿打给你 -还是不用了吧
1:56 Poor little thing. 小可怜
1:58 She's blond. 还是个金发妞儿
2:00 You got the Dreamer. The Dreamer's funny. 你们还有梦想家型的 这类型的人很幽默
2:03 So I quit my job. 所以我辞了职
2:05 Yeah. 没错
2:06 I wanna be a chef. 我想成为一位有名厨师
2:08 You wanted to be a paramedic, you wanted to be a PR agent, and now... 你以前还想过成为一名急救人员 一个公关代理 而现在
2:12 ...you wanna be a chef? 你想成为一位名厨?
2:13 Baby, it's my dream. 亲爱的 这是我的梦想
2:15 Really, Dominic? Because I wanted to be a ballerina and Janet Jackson. 真的么 多米尼克? 我还想成为一名芭蕾舞者或者呢 珍妮特杰克逊
2:20 When I was seven. Do you know what I wanna be now? 那是我七岁时候的梦想 你知道我现在想做什么吗?
2:24 Your ex. -不知道 -你的前女友
2:26 And last but not least, you got the Non-Committer. Pass the ball! 最后 还有永不承诺型 快传球
2:31 This one is from me. (永不承诺型) -这是我送给你的 -好的 亲爱的
2:32 All right, baby. -这是我送给你的 -好的 亲爱的
2:33 -All right! Now it's a party. Drum roll. -Okay, big guy. 知道了 现在才像是个派对了 请击鼓 行了 大块头
2:39 Oh, my God. I will, I will, I will, yes! 我的天啊 我愿意
2:41 You will what? -是的 我愿意 -你愿意什么?
2:49 Earrings... 原来是耳环啊
2:51 ...that I will always treasure. 我愿意永远珍藏
2:54 -You the man, boy. -Told you. -你是个好男人 兄弟 -早就告诉过你了
2:56 -Yo! -You need a beer? 你要瓶啤酒吗?
2:58 Now I'm not saying there aren't a lot of good men out there. 我不是说在外面就没有好男人了
3:00 Take, for instance, the Happily Married Man. 比如说 还有这种幸福的已婚男人型… (幸福已婚男人型)
3:02 Which brings us to my personal favorite, you got the Happier Divorced Guy. 这也就带入了我个人最喜欢的部分 你们还有更加幸福的离婚男人型 (幸福离婚男人型)
3:06 Look at that smile. 快看那笑容
3:07 What I'm saying is, the balance of power has shifted. 我想说的是 力量的平衡已经转移了
3:10 But, Zeke, those aren't my only issues with Gail. 但是斯齐克些不是我和科尔之间 唯一的问题
3:12 It's the nagging, it's the yelling, it's the crazy mood swings. 而是那些碎碎念 和那些疯狂的情绪波动
3:16 I mean, you're not gonna talk to me no kind of way. I'm a grown-ass man. 我说 你不可以用这种方式和我说话 我可是个成年人了
3:19 -Grown-ass man. -You know me, Dom, I'm grown. 成年人 你了解我的 多米 我很成熟了
3:21 Them weren't the only problems you was having with Gail, though, right? 这些不是你和科尔之间存在的 唯一问题对吧
3:23 -Yo, Zeke, do not get that man started. -I'm asking a question! -嘿 齐克别让他说起来了 -我只是问个问题
3:27 No, let's get me started up. Turn the key! Say it, get it out! 不用 让我和大家说说 准备开始 快说啊 都说啊
3:29 Rumor has it that Gail was whooping that ass. 有流言说 科尔教训了他
3:31 What's the first word you said? -你说的第一个词是什么? -我觉得是 "教训了他"
3:33 -I think it was "whooping that ass." -No, first word you said was "rumor." -你说的第一个词是什么? -我觉得是 "教训了他" 不 你说的第一个词是"流言"
3:35 Because that's what it was, Zeke. It's a rumor. 因为那才是它的本质 齐克是个流言
3:38 Ced, you walked in the gym the other day with a little nugget in the side of your eye. 赛德 那天你进体育馆时 你的眼角肿了一小块包
3:41 I fell down the steps, Mike! Okay? I got steps, my steps got a slope in them. 我摔了一跤 好么 迈克尔? 我下楼梯 踩在了自己脚上摔了
3:44 You ever walked down a slope with dress shoes on? 你穿过时装鞋下楼梯吗?
3:46 Wait, so she kicked your ass, then you fell down the steps? 等一下 所以她打了你 然后你摔下了楼梯?
3:48 -See, now it makes perfect sense. -That's real funny. -看吧 现在完全合理了 -那真的很好笑
3:51 Look at the white man trying to make light of the relationship issues... 看看那个白人 把他自己的兄弟的情感关系问题 说得好像无足轻重似的
3:53 -...of a brother. -It's not like that. 并不是那样的
3:55 No, it is like that. Let me tell you something, J. 不 这就是那样的 我来给你说说吧
3:56 Black people marched and died for the right to fight and treat each other like shit. 黑人为了自己的合法权益一起抗争 一起游行示威 所以我们互相待对方如粪土那没关系
3:59 -Oh, my God. -You did not march. -我的天啊 -你并没有游行示威
4:01 You do not have that right. Neither do you, Bennett. 所以你没那权力这么对我 你也一样 版纳德
4:02 I saw it on TV. They show those marches a lot in February. 我在电视上看过了 那些游行在二月份的时候经常播出的
4:05 -Stop. -Your wife kicked your ass. 住嘴 你老婆打了你 这真不是什么大事情 还有更糟的事
4:07 It's really not that big of a deal. 你老婆打了你 这真不是什么大事情 还有更糟的事
4:08 -There's worse things. -It's my ex-wife. Okay? 是我前妻打的 满意了?
4:10 Y'all need to get in the habit of saying that. Ex-wife. 你们所有人都需要养成说 "前妻"的习惯
4:13 You know, it really kills me how y'all like to laugh at my pain. 知道么 你们这样嘲笑我的痛楚 我是有多么地受伤
4:15 I can't wait till y'all experience the shit I'm experiencing. 我等不及看你们这群人 经历我现在所经历的了
4:18 I say Rush Street, first round on Bennett. 我说去蓝儿街 第一轮版纳德请客
4:22 I'm supposed to have dinner with Kristen tonight. 我今晚应该和克里斯汀共进晚餐
4:27 She'll understand, she's cool. I'll send her a text. 她会理解的 她这人很好 我给她发短信说一声
4:30 Welcome back, everybody. 各位 欢迎回来
4:31 We are still here with best-selling author Steve Harvey. 我们依旧在这里与最畅销作家 史蒂夫哈维畅聊
4:36 Well, what I try to get women to understand is that times have changed... 我想要让女性明白的是 时代已经不同了
4:41 ...but your playbook hasn't. 但是你们的剧本却没有变
4:42 I've gotten thousands of letters from all kinds of women... 我收到了成千上万各种各样的 女性读者的来信
4:45 ...who can't find a man, keep a man, or get what they want from their man. 她们似乎不能找到真命天子 不能留住他们 或者从丈夫那里得不到自己想要的
4:50 Until you understand how a man loves... 你得了解一个男人如何爱
4:53 ...how a man operates, how he thinks... 一个男人如何运作 一个男人怎么思考
4:55 ...until you get into the mindset of a man... 你得了解一个男人的心思
4:58 ...you will never win with us in the game of love. 不然你就没办法在爱情中胜过我们
5:01 Well, we certainly want to win with you in the game of love, Steve. 没错 我们十分想要 在这场爱情游戏中赢过你 史蒂夫…
5:05 -We have a question in the audience. -Hi, Steve. (宝贝 我可以跟他们一起出去吗? 回来给你带披萨) …我们的观众有个问题
5:07 I've been living with my boyfriend for five years... 嗨 史蒂夫 我和我的男朋友一起生活了五年了
5:10 ...and he says that he loves me, and he's fully committed. 他说他爱我 也是个乐于担当的人
5:13 I guess what I want to know is how come he hasn't popped the question? 我想知道的是他怎么还没有求婚
5:16 He hasn't popped the question because you haven't required him to. 他没那么做 是因为你并没有要求他那样做
5:20 We'll be right back. 我们马上回来
5:21 RUSH STREET (蓝儿街)
5:25 -Can I get two beers? -Hey!
5:28 I'm Cedric. Cedric, Cedric. 我是塞德里克 塞德里克
5:31 Yeah, I'm not married. That's why I'm not wearing a ring. 我还没结婚 所以我也就没有戴婚戒
5:33 I'm sorry, but Jesus has my heart. 对不起 但是我的心已经皈依耶稣基督了
5:36 Yeah, no, no, no, I get that. I love Jesus too. 不 我明白了 我也信教的
5:40 I talked to him today, I was like, "Jesus," I said, "I need a girl!" 我今天和他谈过了 就像是 我说 "主啊 我需要个姑娘"
5:44 And I get here and I see you, so I was like, "Thank you." 然后我就到了这里 遇见了你 所以我就心想 "感谢您"
5:47 You see Ced over there trying to pull that PYT? 看见塞德在那边撩那美女了么
5:50 Oh, she bad as hell. 哦 她真的很热辣啊
5:51 See, thinking like that, you lose the game before you even step in. 你看 要是真这么想 你还没参战呢就已经输了
5:54 -What are you talking about? -I'm gonna go on and leave. 你们在聊些什么啊 我还是走算了
5:59 She's crazy. And I don't like her knees. 她疯了 而且我不喜欢他的膝盖
6:03 Excuse me, Miss, I noticed that you were.... 打扰一下 小姐我注意到你
6:05 Honestly, I couldn't care less about whatever it is you have to say. 说实话 我根本不在乎 你到底想要说些什么
6:08 And I can appreciate that. 对此我十分感激 我只知道我好像之前在这里见过你
6:09 I just know that I've seen you here before and you're usually so stunning.... 对此我十分感激 我只知道我好像之前在这里见过你 而你也会一直有这些
6:12 And you'll always have those memories. 美好回忆
6:14 In fact, why don't you walk away and pretend this.... 事实上 为什么你就不滚开 然后装作…
6:17 I don't know what I did to make you so defensive. 我不明白我做了什么让你这样反感
6:18 All I'm saying is, whatever it is, it's no reason to let yourself go, that's it. 我想说的是 管它是什么 你不能够那样放纵你自己
6:22 Let myself go? -就这样 -放纵我自己?
6:23 I didn't mean any disrespect.... 我并没有不敬之意
6:25 -Let me tell your tired ass something. -Something's changed. 让我来给你个烦人的家伙说说清楚 一定是发生了什么事情
6:27 Usually, there's an aura, there's a glint about you that I'm not seeing. 我通常能看见 你身上有一种我从没见过的 光环与光芒在闪烁 可现在却没有了
6:30 And I don't know if it's a relationship or if it's job related, it's just.... 我不知道这是否与一段关系 亦或是工作有关 还是…
6:36 Is that it? 是因为这个?
6:38 It's work-related? 与工作有关?
6:40 Well, to be honest... 好吧 说实话
6:45 ...I was laid off from my job about two months ago. 我…两个月前被请辞了
6:47 -This damn economy. -How'd it go? 这该死的经济形势 怎么会这样?
6:49 Not good, man. 不是很顺利 兄弟
6:50 I literally have nothing to say anymore. I don't know what's going on. 我真的是无话可说了 我不知道到底怎么了
6:53 And my breath ain't right. 我的口气貌似也不太好
6:55 -Drink a beer. -You smell it? -喝杯啤酒吧 -你闻到了?
6:56 You can't let that steal your smile, because that smile I'm talking about... 你不能让这事夺去你的笑容 因为我所说的笑容
6:59 ...that's gonna get you that next CEO gig, you get it? 会给你带来下一个首席执行官职位 明白吗?
7:01 See now? See? You're smiling. 看见没 明白么 你在笑
7:03 Now I'm smiling. 然后我也跟着笑
7:04 I'ma walk away from here like a fairy now, because I'm all happy. 我会像一个神仙一样离开 因为我现在快乐似神仙
7:07 -A fairy? -Yeah. -一个神仙? -没错
7:09 -Have a good evening. -Thank you. -晚上过得开心 -谢谢你
7:14 Got shot down. 你也给枪毙了
7:16 Wait. 等一等
7:20 She calling him back for another episode of crazy. 她叫他回去在演一出疯狂剧集
7:23 Here. 拿去
7:24 She probably shot him down. Twice. 她可能又要拒绝他 第二次了
7:27 Crazy, right? Talking about Jesus and she don't speak English and stuff, right? 她很疯狂对么? 耶稣基督然后也不会说英语 之类的东西 对吧?
7:31 Luck of mine. She actually gave me her damn number. 我撞大运了 事实上她给了我她的电话
7:34 The Dark Knight strikes again. 黑暗骑士再次绝地反击
7:36 How great is Kristen, man? -克里斯汀怎么样了啊 伙计 -很好
7:38 -Nice. -She's a phenomenal girl. 她是个非凡的女孩
7:40 I just don't understand why she's with this dude. 我只是不明白为什么她跟了这家伙
7:41 -Nobody does. -How good is your credit? -没人明白 -你的信用等级多少了 伙计
7:44 It's up. Low 400s, 430? 涨了 大概400多 430?
7:46 Goddamn! A 430? You can't even get a Discover Card! 不是吧 才430? 你大概连发现卡都申请不了吧
7:50 Don't white people start off with a 500 credit score? 白人不是要500 个信誉点才能办么?
7:52 Five-fifty, 475 if you're a mulatto. 是550 如果你是个黑白混血 只要475
7:54 Cedric! Yes, Gail. -塞德里克 -什么事 科尔
7:57 Gail, listen to what I'm trying to say! Gail, I don't care! 科尔听听我想要说什么 科尔我才不在乎
8:00 I don't care what you take out the garage! You can take the whole damn garage. 我才不在乎你从车库里拿走了什么 你连整个车库都可以拿走
8:03 Let me tell you something. Here's what I want, and this is what's-- Hello? 让我来告诉你 什么是我想要的 这才是 你好?
8:06 Gail? 科尔?
8:07 Y'all, I swear.... 你们 我发誓
8:08 She didn't let me finish my sentence. I don't like that. 她还没让我把话说完 我不喜欢她那样
8:10 Hey, Ced. When's the divorce gonna be final? 嘿 赛德 你的婚什么时候离完啊?
8:13 Goodness, if I had to guess, I'd say like four weeks, 367 hours... 天啊 如果要我猜 我会猜四周367小时
8:16 ...22 minutes, 32 seconds. That's just a guess. 22分32秒 那只是个猜测
8:19 -Who's counting? -But you know what we should do? -谁数了? -但是你们知道我要做什么吗?
8:21 We should take Cedric out for celebration game night. 我们应该把塞德里克 带去庆祝游戏狂欢夜
8:23 I can't do Sunday. This Sunday, dinner with my ma. Little casserole action. 星期天我没空 这星期天 得和老妈吃完饭 小砂锅行动
8:26 -That's every Sunday. -I can't do Sunday either. -那就是每个星期天了 -我星期天也不行
8:29 Jonah's got a violin recital. 约拿 有一个小提琴演奏会
8:31 My God, dude, your kid has way too many recitals. 我的天 伙计 你孩子的演奏会可真是太多了啊
8:33 Wait a minute, hold on, wait. Your son play the violin? 等一会儿 听停一下 等等 你的儿子拉小提琴?
8:36 -And the cello. -Yo, he's gay. -还有大提琴 -他是同性恋
8:38 -Playing the violin doesn't make him gay. -Yes, it does. -拉小提琴并不代表他就是同性恋 -那是可以的
8:40 -Name me one gay violinist. -Your son. -给我说一个同性恋小提琴家 -你儿子
8:42 Listen to this. Cedric is about to be released from the shackles of Gail-Hell. 好好听着 塞德里克就快要从 科尔地狱释放出来了
8:46 Forever. And we're about to miss it for what? Another Jonah recital. 永远的 而我们要为了什么错过那时刻呢? -约拿的另一个演奏会 -是啊
8:49 -By the way, he sucks. -Really? 顺便说一句 -他拉得太差了 -真的?
8:52 I'd expect that from them, not you. 我还说他们会那样说 而你不会
8:53 -What do you mean, "them"? -Like what, like black people or what? -你说的 他们 是什么意思 -像什么 像黑人或者什么?
8:56 Absolutely. 就是
8:57 I don't get mad because he's bold enough to say it. 我并没生气是因为他 有胆把这句话说出来
8:59 Seriously, you have ears. Kid's tone-deaf. 真的 你的耳朵是孩子的音盲
9:01 This is his big solo. They're playing the Gap Band. 这是他的独奏演出 他们会表演“卡呀乐队”的曲目
9:04 You know, Dropped a Bomb on Me, and he's got the last... "Baby!" 那首《给我掉了一个炸弹》 他演奏最后"宝贝儿"那段
9:07 Look, I got a great idea. I'll have my mom cook for us. 听着 我有一个绝妙的点子 我让我妈给我们做饭
9:10 She'll make some chocolate chip cookies, a big casserole. We'll do it the right way. 她会做巧克力夹心曲奇 一个大砂锅 我们现在就行动…
9:13 Mike, I almost punched you in your damn face just now, man. 迈克尔 我刚才几乎就要一拳打 在你那欠揍的脸上 兄弟
9:15 And I was gonna add a head butt. 我还打算加一个头部冲撞
9:16 I'm not going over your mom house to celebrate my damn divorce party! 我没打算去 你妈妈家开我的离婚派对
9:19 -We gotta eat. We can start there.... -I don't wanna eat with your mom! 我们得吃东西 我们可以从这里开始 我不想和你妈妈一起吃饭
9:21 I ain't going over his mom house. 我才不要去他妈妈家
9:23 Look, she just got the new Tyler Perry, For Colored Girls on Blu-ray. 听着 她刚刚拿到了新的泰勒佩里的 有色女孩的蓝光碟
9:26 We'll just have a nice little fellas night, a chill-out night. 我们会有一个美好的兄弟之夜 一个十分温暖的夜晚 让我来告诉你电影里发生了什么 珍妮特杰克逊最后得了艾滋病
9:29 Let me tell you what happens, Janet Jackson gets AIDS at the end... 让我来告诉你电影里发生了什么 珍妮特杰克逊最后得了艾滋病
9:31 ...and some crazy guy throws his kids out the window. You good? 还有一些疯了的人将她的孩子 扔出了窗户 行了吗?
9:33 -Can we party now? Let's do it! -I hate you. -我们能好好玩吗 让我们开始吧 -我恨你
9:35 -All right, put them up! -Yes, sir. -行了 举起来吧 -好的
9:39 Fine, I'm in, man. 好吧 我加入
9:41 Life is great, fellas. May it never change. 生活如此美好 伙计们 许愿此情此景永不改变
9:45 None of us could have known that the first bomb had been dropped. 没有人注意到第一个炸弹已经扔下了
9:48 The war had been declared. 战争已经拉响
9:49 And hard-worn secrets had now fallen into the hands of the enemy. 藏不住的秘密已落入了敌方阵营手中
9:53 ACT LIKE A LADY, THINK LIKE A MAN (像女人一样做事 像男人 一样思考)
9:54 We had been betrayed by one of our own. A man. 我们被自己的一员背叛了 阿曼
9:56 I'm talking about a man with a penis. 我说的是货真价实带把儿的汉子
9:58 Someone who should know better. 一个应该有更高觉悟的人
10:00 And because of those actions, a blitz was now on its way... 正因为这些行动 这场闪电战已然将近
10:02 ...that would affect my entire Band of Brothers. 那会影响到我的整个兄弟会
10:05 We have another question in the audience, Steve. 史蒂夫我们的观众有其他的问题
10:07 Steve, I keep hooking up with guys who don't want a relationship. 史蒂夫我老是搞上 那些不愿意恋爱的男人
10:10 -Why don't you stop hooking up? -Did you hear that? -为什么你不停止乱搞呢? -你听到了吗?
10:13 Listen, men respect women who have standards. Just get some. 听着 男人尊重那些有准则的女人 制定一下自己的准则吧
10:18 Exactly. 没错
10:20 Steve, I'm a partner in my law firm, I own my own home... (丽思卡尔顿酒店) 我是我律师事务所的合伙人 我有自己的房子
10:23 ...but I've been single for three years. 但是我已经单身三年了
10:25 Why can't I seem to find a man to live up to my standards? 为什么我就不能找到一个符合 我标准的男人呢?
10:28 Maybe you need to adjust them a little bit. 也许你需要做一些小小的调整
10:30 -Bullshit. -Are you saying that we should settle? -扯淡 -你是说我们应该将就吗?
10:32 Look, you make six figures. Does he have to? 听着 你自己再好好想想 他必须得这样吗?
10:34 Yes. -是的 -你有自己的房子
10:36 You own your own home. Does he have to? -是的 -你有自己的房子 -他必须得这样吗? -对啊
10:38 Yes and yes. -他必须得这样吗? -对啊
10:39 We have another question here in the audience. 我们这里的观众还有另一个问题
10:41 Hi, Steve. I'm currently dating and I just wanna know... 嗨 史蒂夫 我现在正在恋爱 我只是想知道
10:45 ...when is the right time for me to introduce my man to my kid? 我该在什么样的好时机把男友 介绍给我孩子认识?
10:49 I know that single women don't want to have a parade of men... 我知道单身女性不想要一队列的男人
10:52 ...coming through the house. 轮番来自己的家
10:54 -Exactly! -I get that. -没错 -我了解那点
10:55 -But if a guy is a serious contender... -What up, Mama? -但如果一个男人有强烈的竞争欲望 -妈妈 最近可好?
10:57 Excuse you? 说什么呢?
10:58 -...bring him in as soon as possible. -Morning, Mom. -最好尽快将他带进你的生活 -早上好 妈妈
11:00 Because if you invest six months in a man and then introduce him to the kids... 因为如果你在一个男人身上 花了六个月的时间 然后你把他介绍给你的孩子
11:04 ...and he's not feeling the kids, or vice versa... 结果他和孩子没有产生感情 或者孩子反之亦然
11:08 ...then guess what? You just wasted six months. 猜猜怎么着 你结结实实浪费了六个月时间
11:11 That's true. Did that. 说得真对 已经那样做过了
11:19 Alex? 亚历克斯?
11:22 Alex? 亚历克斯?
11:26 Alex! 亚历克斯!
11:28 Wake up! 快醒醒
11:32 Look, babe, I got us two double-shot lattes. 听着 宝贝 我给咱们买了两杯双份拿铁
11:35 -Thanks, baby. -Here. -谢了 宝贝儿 -给你
11:38 Figured we needed some caffeine after last night. 考虑到昨晚后我们需要补充点咖啡因
11:41 It was amazing. 那太棒了
11:47 I'm gonna go and freshen up. 我要走了 去梳洗一下
11:49 So I'll be right back. 我马上就回来
11:52 I'll be right here. 我就在这
11:56 -Don't move. -Don't worry, I won't. -别动 -别担心 我不会动的
12:00 So babe, I was thinking maybe we could go on our first real date. 宝贝儿 我在想也许 我们可以第一次真正的来一次约会
12:04 -We could go see a movie? -Yeah, babe. -我们去看场电影? -没错 宝贝儿
12:06 We should do that. Things between us are gonna start getting real serious, baby. 我们该那么做 我们之间真的 开始变得认真起来了 宝贝儿
12:11 Okay, so I was thinking maybe we could go see the new Tyler Perry movie. 好啊 所以我在想也许我们 可以去看泰勒佩里的新电影
12:14 You know, the one where the guy's, like, mean to his girlfriend... 你知道的 开始那男的对他的女朋友很刻薄
12:16 ...and a nice guy comes and rescues her and at the end, they both find Jesus. 一个好男人出现了 并救了她 最后他们还都信了教
12:21 Alex? So yes to the Tyler Perry movie? 亚历克斯 所以愿意去看泰勒佩里的电影吗?
12:26 Alex! 亚历克斯!
12:32 Michelle It was fun (米歇尔 真好玩)
12:33 "Michelle"? “米歇尔”?
12:37 It's Mya, asshole! 你这混蛋 我是玛雅
12:40 Mya. 玛雅
12:44 Did this nigga take my coffee? 这黑鬼拿走了我的咖啡?
12:46 It was like some long-hidden truth had finally been released... 这就像是那些长久隐藏在精装书
12:49 ...in hardcover and paperback. 和平装书中的秘笈终于大白于天下
12:52 For my book club. 这是为我的读书俱乐部买的
12:53 -For me! -For my mom! -给我自己 -给我妈妈
12:55 For the first time in their lives, women all over... 女人们好像在她们生命中第一次
12:58 ...stopped turning to other women for relationship advice. 不再向另一位女性 寻求情感关系的建议
13:01 Really? 真的吗?
13:02 -I got one too many. -Thank you. -我多出了一本 -谢谢你
13:04 Instead, they went straight to a man, Steve Harvey. 相反 她们直奔向了一个男人 史蒂夫哈维求助
13:08 He had made his name as a comedian, but this shit here? This wasn't funny. 这家伙是由喜剧演员出名的 可这天杀的书里写的东西?
13:11 And because of this, things would never be the same. 真的不好笑 正因为此 事情再也不会和以前一样了
13:20 BARNES & NOBLE (巴诺书店)
13:24 "The Mama's Boy" vs. "The Single Mom" (“妈咪宝贝” 对战 “单身母亲”)
13:36 Excuse me? Excuse me? 不好意思 这边 打扰一下
13:39 Yeah, hi. Hey, did you by any chance go to Fairfax High? 嗨 你是不是在费尔法克斯高中上的学?
13:42 Yes. 对啊
13:44 I went there as well. Michael Hanover. 我也去那里读过 我是迈克尔汉诺威
13:45 -Candace Hall. -Yeah, I remember. -我是卡丹哈尔 -我记得你
13:47 I had classes with your sister Lisa. 我和你的姐姐丽萨一起上过课
13:49 -Next in line. -I'm sorry, I don't recognize you. 对不起 我没认出你
13:51 Well, yeah, I was, like, five feet tall, 99 pounds when we graduated. 好吧 我毕业的时候大概1米5 45公斤
13:55 I had the glasses and the buck teeth. 我戴着眼镜 大龅牙
14:00 That look familiar, maybe down here? 也许这样会让你觉得比较熟悉?
14:01 Yeah, you do. 没错 是比较熟悉了
14:04 I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. You dissing me already? 我不确定那到底是好事 还是坏事 你已经认不出我了?
14:07 Well, you've grown up. Quite nicely. 你已经长大了 出落得很棒
14:09 And you haven't changed a bit. You look amazing. 你还是一点没有变 你看上去美极了
14:12 Well, you need to put those glasses back on, obviously. 说真的 你得把这眼镜重新带上 看看清楚了
14:15 No, actually, I'm nearsighted. 不 事实上 我是近视眼
14:18 Besides, I mean, how could I forget my teenage crush? 除此之外 我怎么可能忘记 我青少年时期的暗恋对象
14:21 I used to look at you walk down the hallway... 我过去常常偷看你走过门厅
14:25 ...and just fall into your smile. 然后…被你的笑容迷住了
14:27 I'm rambling, I do that when I get nervous. 我又满嘴跑火车 每当我紧张的时候就会那样
14:31 Next in line. 下一个
14:32 Well, it was nice meeting-- I mean, seeing you. 好愉快的一次见面 我的意思是见到你
14:35 It's nice finally being seen. 很高兴你最终看到我了
14:38 Next in line, please. 下一个
14:47 Candace? 卡丹?
14:49 Could we go grab a cup of coffee or something? 我们能一起喝一杯咖啡或者什么吗?
14:51 We could maybe catch up on old times we never had. 我们也许可以叙叙旧 聊聊没什么交集的旧时光
14:53 I can't, actually. I have to pick up my-- 说真的 不行 我得去接我的
14:56 -Husband? -No... -丈夫? -不是
14:58 -You got a boyfriend? -No, I have a son. -你有男朋友了? -不是 我有一个儿子
15:07 Well, how about dinner? 好吧 晚饭怎么样
15:13 Yeah. 好啊
15:15 "The Non-Committer" vs. "The Girl Who Wants the Ring" (“承诺恐惧者” 对战 “恨嫁女”)
15:18 -I finally get it. -Get what? -我终于想到了 -想到什么了?
15:20 Getting Jeremy to propose is like getting Jeremy to paint the kitchen... 怎么让杰里米向我求婚 就像是让杰里米粉刷厨房
15:22 ...or put the toilet seat down. 或者说把马桶盖放下一样
15:24 It's not gonna happen until I require him to. 我要是不开口他永远不会做
15:27 And I haven't required him to do a damn thing. 我还真没要求 他做过任何一件事情
15:30 You know we still go halfsies on everything? 你知道么 我们所有的事情都仍然是一样
15:32 -I thought that was your idea. -Yeah, in college. -我以为那是你的主意 -是的 在大学的时候
15:35 He was work study and I felt sorry for him. 那时候他在勤工俭学 我觉得我该体恤他
15:37 And I am still paying for it, to this day. 然后 我就 一直在负责开支 直到今天
15:39 Hey, I'm Kristen. 你好 我叫克里斯汀
15:41 -Hi, welcome. -Welcome, please sign in. -你好 欢迎你 -欢迎 请签到
15:44 -Congratulations. -Thank you. Six months. -恭喜你 -谢谢啊 已经六个月了
15:47 Yeah, and we can't wait. 是的 我们已经等不及要迎接这个宝宝了
15:49 Thank you. 谢谢
15:51 Here, come on. 过来
15:53 -Watch your step. -See, that is a man with a plan. -小心脚下 -看到了吗 那才是个有计划的男人
15:55 He knows what he wants, he knows what he has. 他知道自己要什么 也知道自己拥有什么
15:58 I sell beautiful homes for a living, and we live in a frat house for the boys. 我靠销售漂亮房子赚钱 却跟男朋友住在一个 男生联谊会似的地方
16:03 Last Valentine's Day, the boys were there. 上个情人节 他那群兄弟都在那儿
16:05 So you're saying, you're-- 所以 你是说你是…
16:07 My God, I'm one of the boys, except I have a vagina! 天啊 我是他们中的一员 除了说我有"小妹妹"
16:11 I swear to God, Frodo Baggins had it easier. 我发誓连弗洛多都过得比那好点
16:13 -I'm sorry, who? -Frodo, from The Hobbit. -什么 谁? -弗洛多霍比特人里的人物
16:16 I don't do hobbits. 我不知道什么霍比特人
16:17 Right, no, me neither. That's so lame. Jeremy had a chess set. 对 我也不知道那东西 非常地无聊 杰里米甚至还有个棋盘
16:21 -It's totally stupid. -Okay, so what are you gonna do? 简直愚蠢到家了 好吧 那么你要做什么呢
16:24 You're gonna trick him into giving you a ring? 你要哄骗他给你个结婚戒指吗?
16:25 I'm not gonna trick him. I'm going to require him. 我不会哄骗他的 我会要求他
16:30 It's been nine years. 已经过了九年了
16:31 So, what makes you think it's gonna change now? 所以 你凭什么认为 现在情况会有所改变呢
16:33 I've got some new information. 我得到了一些新情报
16:35 Oh, you do? 哦 真的吗?
16:36 Yeah, because Steve says "Don't hate the Player." 是的 因为史蒂夫说的 不要怨恨球员
16:40 Change the game. 要改变游戏规则
16:42 It's your shot. Wait! 该你投了 等一下!
16:44 You gotta raise your left leg. 你要把左腿抬起来
16:51 H-O, you're a ho. Really? I'm a ho? -基伊鸡你就是个妓女 -说真的我还算妓女
16:55 I've been with the same woman for nine years. 我都已经跟同一个女人 在一起九年了
16:56 I'm the Stedman Graham of relationships, all right? 我在感情生活方面可是个 斯特德曼格雷厄姆好吗?
16:58 Bro, I'm not saying ho like "whore." 兄弟 我没说你是那种妓女
17:00 I'm saying ho, like punk bitch that's been henpecked... 我的意思是你就像是个 被老婆捏住脖子的妻管严
17:03 ...so he ain't got no more nuts, because his girl runs the house. 我的意思是你就像是个 被老婆捏住脖子的妻管严 因为他女人管他管的严
17:06 -Speaking of which, how's Kristen? -She's incredible. -说到女朋友克里斯汀怎么样了 -她太完美了
17:08 We were up till 2:00 a.m. playing Call of Duty last night. She loved it. 我们昨晚玩使命召唤游戏 到凌晨2点才睡 她爱那个游戏
17:11 She doesn't. She does it for you. 她这么做 她这么做纯粹是为了你
17:13 I know my woman, okay? Fantasy? Science fiction? Action figures? 我了解我的女人好吗 最终幻想 科幻小说 动作玩偶?
17:16 -All the stuff I love, she loves too. -No, she does that shit... 我喜欢的所有东西 她都喜欢
17:19 ...for you, trust me. Deep down inside, she's thinking: 不 相信我 她喜欢那些废物都是为了你
17:21 This is some silly-ass shit. 这都是些蠢得要死的垃圾
17:25 What the hell? 要疯了
17:26 No wonder Jeremy hasn't proposed yet, he hasn't gone through puberty. 难怪杰里米到现在还没求婚 他还没过青春期呢
17:30 It's time for a little spring cleaning. 到了春季大扫除的时间了
17:34 You first. 就从你开始
17:37 No, no. That's your problem, Gail. 不 那是你的问题 科尔
17:38 You don't never want to listen, you just want to talk. 你从来都不想倾听 你只想倾诉
17:40 What'd I say? I said I'm gonna be there tomorrow. 我说了什么 我说我明天会去
17:42 No, no, no. Listen, Gail... 不 听着 科尔
17:44 -I'm not gonna go back and forth with you. -Oh, man. -我不想再跟你纠缠了 -哦 兄弟
17:46 Because I'm trying to talk and you ain't gonna let me say what I-- Hello? 因为我在试图好好讲话 而你不让我讲 喂?
17:48 Gail? 科尔?
17:50 Did it again. Hung up on me again. 又是这样 她又挂我电话
17:52 What do you call the three rings of marriage? 你们说婚姻是关于什么的三个环
17:54 No clue. -不知道 -订婚指环
17:55 The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffer-ring. 结婚指环 还有受难指环
17:58 Oh, and, in your case, the beating. 哦 以及 对你来说 挨打指环
18:00 This is not the time. You know, y'all underestimate me because I'm short. 现在不是说这话的时候 你知道的 你们都因为我长得矮而低估我
18:03 No, it's because you a fool. 不 我们低估你因为你是个蠢货
18:04 What up? What's happening, baby? 怎么了 发生什么了 小伙子?
18:06 The hell's wrong with you? 你这是怎么了?
18:07 -You're stoned. -Yeah, you're high! -你大醉啊 -是啊 你喝高了
18:10 Either you're high, or everything on my eHarmony profile is true. 你要不是嗨了 那就是我在 和谐佳缘里的所有资料都成真了
18:13 I'm high off life, gentlemen. 我的生活本身就让我很嗨
18:15 I met this girl. 我遇到了一个女孩
18:17 No, matter of fact, she's not even a girl. I met a woman. 不 实际上 她不是个女孩 我遇到一个女人
18:21 But you are a woman. 但你自己就是个女人啊
18:25 "The Dreamer" vs. "The Woman Who Is Her Own Man" (“梦想家” 对战 “女强人”)
18:28 Order up! 上菜了
18:30 Hey, guess who's back. Table eight. 嘿 猜猜谁出现了 看八桌
18:36 She is way out of your league, Dom. 多米 她跟你可不是一个阶级的
18:38 Ain't no such thing, playboy. 没这种事的 花花公子
18:40 All right, she probably spends more here in one night than you make in a month. 好吧 她在这里一个晚上的花费 可能比你一个月赚的还要多
18:44 That's true, but, you know, just think how much she'll save if I cook for her. 真实 不过你知道么 只要想想看 如果我给她做饭 她会省下多少钱
18:48 Oh, you crazy. 呃 你已经疯了
18:49 Dominic. Scallions? 多米 我的葱呢
18:51 All right, Chef, coming up. 好了 主厨 这就来
18:53 -Well, you look cute. What's going on? -I do? -你精神焕发了 怎么了 -是吗
18:55 -Yes. -Thank you, that was nice of you. -是的 -谢谢你 说得真好
18:57 Just, you know, Duke made Little League, got a new laptop, met a guy. 你知道的 杜克加入了少年棒球联盟 买了个新电脑 我遇到了个男的
19:00 I think I'm gonna try the white sea bass. 我想我要试试这道白鲈鱼 哇 等等 遇到了个什么
19:03 -Whoa, whoa, whoa. Met a what? -A guy. 哇 等等 遇到了个什么 一个男的
19:06 A real one? Not a blow-up doll? 活的 不是个充气娃娃?
19:07 Okay, don't look so surprised. It's not that-- 好吧 别这么惊讶 又不是…
19:10 Honey, I'm just saying, it's been two years since your divorce. 亲爱的 我只是说说 从你两年前离婚之后
19:13 And three, maybe four, since you had sex. 已经三年或者四年没有过性生活了
19:16 I said I met a guy, Lauren, I didn't say I was changing my last name. 我说的是我遇到了个男的劳伦 我没说我要嫁给他
19:19 Yet. 还没而已
19:21 I need all the details, honey. Now. Spill it. 亲爱的 告诉我所有细节 赶紧坦白
19:23 -Is she hot? -Pure fire. -她火辣吗? -简直火爆了
19:26 Does she got real big titties? 她的胸大吗?
19:27 Yeah, what's the rack like? Tell us about the rack. 对啊 胸型怎么样 告诉我们
19:29 The rack. Definitely some white boy shit. 胸型 这是那些白人男孩说的废话
19:31 It is white boy shit. We love breasts. 那就是白人男孩的话 我们喜欢胸部
19:34 You're not even white, Bennett. You're clear. 你可不是白人 版纳德! 你多明显
19:36 -He's got kind eyes. Soulful. -Yes! -他的眼神很善良 充满了灵性 -是的
19:38 He's sensitive. 非常敏感
19:39 I know she got a fat ass. 我知道的就是她有个很大的屁股
19:41 She got that J.Lo, Serena Williams mash up. 就好像珍妮弗洛佩兹和小威的集合体
19:43 Ass so big, I could hide underneath it if it was raining. 她的屁股那么大 下雨的时候我都能躲在下面了
19:46 -That's way too much ass. -No such thing. -那可有点太大了 -才没那回事
19:48 Damn right, it ain't. The bigger, the better. 非常对 不会太大 越大越好
19:50 But it wasn't just a physical attraction, it was intellectual. 但是那不仅仅是肉体上的吸引 而是精神上的交流
19:55 He loved The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks. 他喜欢 《亨丽埃塔莱克斯的不朽生命》
19:57 He bought one for his mom's book club. Isn't that sweet? 还买了一本作为他妈妈的收藏 那真是很贴心
20:00 -Yeah, and kind of gay. -He's a gentleman. -是啊 还有点同性恋的感觉 -他只是绅士风度
20:02 -Yo, she a ho. I know she a ho. -Oh, definitely a ho. -她是个妓女 我知道她是个妓女 -是啊 绝对是个妓女
20:05 Both of you, you both watch your mouth, all right? This one's not a ho. 你们两个 说话给我小心点 好吗 这回这个不是妓女 她是…她是个淑女
20:08 She's a lady. 她是…她是个淑女
20:09 -Whipped already. -Enjoy it while it lasts, Mike. -你已经被征服了 -在你还有感觉的时候 享受这感觉吧 迈克尔
20:12 Let me tell you something, it ain't gonna last forever. 我告诉你 那不会持续很久的
20:14 They all start out happy. 所有感情的开始都很开心
20:15 See, but here's when it gets real. 不过还是现实点吧
20:17 When you wake up in the morning, and you go in the living room... 当你早晨起床 你走进起居室
20:19 ...and you catch her pissing inside of your Jordans. 然后你发现她弄脏了你的乔丹篮球鞋
20:21 And not the regular Jordans. 而且那不是普通的乔丹
20:23 I'm talking about the ones with the patent leather on the side... 我说的是那种边上有漆皮的限量版
20:25 ...where the pee don't come out. 脏东西可是洗不掉的
20:26 Don't listen to them, Mike. Relationships are beautiful. 别听他们的麦可 爱情是美好的
20:29 -Just saying. -So when are you guys going out? -只是说说嘛 -所以你们什么时候开始约会?
20:31 Saturday night. She got to find a sitter, first, and then-- 周六晚上 她得先找个保姆 然后
20:35 -What, like a dog sitter? -No, she has a son. -什么 就像是宠物保姆吗? -不 她有个儿子
20:37 -What? -She has a child. -什么? -她有个孩子
20:39 All right, well, be careful dating a baby mama. 好吧 那么 跟个妈妈约会的话要当心了
20:40 -Why? -Because she's the baby mama. -为什么 -因为她是个孩子的妈
20:43 Dude, she ain't looking for a couple laughs and some butt-naked sex. 兄弟 她可不是为了寻找一段 只为了上床和开心的关系
20:45 She been a couple laughs and some butt-naked sex. 她已经有过上床和开心的关系了
20:47 -Preach. -She looking for a husband. -太说教了 -她找的是一个丈夫
20:49 A father for her son. Speaking of which, where's the baby daddy? 和他儿子的父亲 说到这 那孩子的父亲上哪儿去了
20:51 -Oh, good question, Zeke. -Thank you. -哦 齐克问得好 -谢谢
20:53 Could be a psycho. Just got paroled for killing her last boyfriend. 可能是个神经病 因为谋杀了 她的上个男友被逮捕刚刚才获得假释
20:57 Or he could be one of those guys that like to hide in a bush... 或者 他可能是那种藏在路边 灌木丛里的男人
20:59 ...waiting for a strange guy to come to his baby mom's house. 等待着陌生的男人来到 他儿子的妈家里
21:01 And when he gets there, he pops out the bushes... 当这陌生男人到了那儿的时候 他会从灌木丛中跳出来
21:04 ...hits this guy on the back of the head with a brick. 用一块砖头打这个男人的后脑
21:06 Without even realizing... 根本都不知道这个男人 跟孩他妈之间的关系
21:07 ...that this guy's relationship with his baby mom was platonic. 根本都不知道这个男人 跟孩他妈之间的关系 只是柏拉图式的精神恋爱
21:09 They ever catch that guy? 那个人被抓到过没有?
21:11 No, it's a cold case. The cops won't even revisit the case. 没有 成为悬案了 警察甚至都没再过问
21:14 They said they couldn't find the brick. 人们说他们找不到那砖头
21:16 I'm just saying, I'm just saying. 我只是说说 只是说说
21:19 -None of that matters. -Really? -那些东西都没关系 -真的吗
21:21 Because you should see her smile. 你应该看看她的笑容
21:23 -Oh, shit. All right! Okay. -Good night, Mike. -哦 该死的 好吧 -晚安 迈克
21:26 Talking to you about bricks! You wanna go talk about a smile. -哦 该死的 好吧 -晚安 迈克 我正跟你说着砖头 你却想要讨论笑容
21:29 -There is one thing, though. -I knew it, he was born a woman. -不过 的确有件事有问题 -我就知道 他是个变性人
21:31 No.
21:34 -He's, you know, he's... -He's what? -他有点 你知道的 他有点… -他有点什么
21:36 A little younger. You have kidnapped a cub, haven't you? -有点年轻 -哦 你养了条小狼狗是吧?
21:39 No, I'll have you know, he seems very mature, actually. 不 我要跟你说的是 实际上 他看起来非常成熟
21:42 Wait a minute, why am I getting all worked up? 等一下 我怎么这么激动?
21:44 We haven't even had a date yet. 我们甚至还没有约会过呢
21:45 I still need to qualify if he's even a contender. 我还需要鉴定一下 他是不是个合格竞争者
21:48 -Qualify? -What are his long-term goals? -鉴定吗? -比如…他的长期目标是什么?
21:51 What are his short-term goals? Can he provide? 他的短期目标是什么 他养得起家吗?
21:53 Don't hit him with all that at once. 别一起问他那么多问题
21:54 I know, don't worry. I intend to be stealth. 我知道 别担心 我会秘密进行的
21:58 You? How? 你吗 怎么秘密进行?
22:00 By acting like a lady, but thinking like a man. 我可以表现得像个淑女 但是用男人的思维思考
22:04 Oh, you fell for that sexist crap? 哦 你完全陷入了 那个性别歧视者的胡说八道了
22:07 He's actually giving insight into a man's perspective. 他的确给给了我们洞察男人的观点
22:09 Why should I have to lower my standards to get a man? Who does that? 为什么我要降低我的标准 去适应一个男的 谁会做那种事?
22:12 I'm sorry. Now, what man? 对不起 那么 什么样的男人?
22:14 I just want my equal. 我只想要个跟我相等条件的
22:16 Okay? Or at least an attractive, cultured man. 好吗 或者至少是个有吸引力的 有教养的男人
22:18 Who's over six feet tall, makes six figures, and isn't intimidated by my success. 他得超过1米83 收入六位数 而且不会因为我的成功吓到
22:23 Okay, girl. Quit chasing the ghost of James Merrill's past. 好吧 女孩 别再去追寻 詹姆斯 梅尔过去的鬼魂了
22:25 He is married and long gone. 他已经结婚了 并且死了很长时间了
22:27 That man was fine. 那个男人就挺好的
22:29 Here we go. Let's do a little research, here. 是啊 咱们可以做个小调查
22:31 -This is you. -Please, I don't... -这就是你 -求你了 我可不… 坚强 独立 孤单的女人
22:33 "Strong, independent, and lonely women." 坚强 独立 孤单的女人
22:36 I don't need some bald-headed man on a book... 我才不用什么写书的秃顶男人
22:38 ...telling me I am strong and independent. 来告诉我 我坚强而独立
22:40 Honey, that's a given. But you forgot lonely. -宝贝 那是既定的事实 -但你忘了说孤单
22:43 You are a bitch. 你是个坏人!
22:44 You're too strong, Lauren. 你太坚强了!劳伦
22:45 There's no such thing as too strong. And you know what? 才没什么太坚强了呢 而且你知道吗?
22:49 If I were a man, being the youngest COO of a Fortune 500 company... 如果我是个男的 成为世界500强企业中 最年轻的首席运营官
22:53 ...would actually be a good thing. Women would flock. 就会变成一件好事 女人们会飞奔来抢我
22:56 Yeah, but men flee when you lead with that. 是的 但是如果你是那样的话 男的会飞快地逃开
22:58 And it's not just your job, Lauren. 并且不光是你的职业 劳伦
23:00 Remember what Marcel said on your last date... 记得你上次的约会 你鄙视了马塞尔
23:02 ...after you trumped his wine choice? 对红酒的选择之后 他说了什么吗
23:03 -It was a better choice. -What were his words again? -我的选择更好些 -他到底说了什么?
23:06 "You don't need a man, Lauren, you are a man." 你不需要男人 劳伦你自己就是个男人
23:09 Happy belated birthday. For you. 给你一本 当是迟到的生日礼物
23:13 I'm just saying, all this waiting for better? It's making you bitter. 我就是那么一说 所有的那些 等待更好的出现的说辞 都只会让你更痛苦
23:21 Hey, babe? 嘿 宝贝
23:22 I stopped off for a beer, but picked us up some dinner. 我途中停下来喝了点酒 不过我为我们带回了晚餐
23:28 Oh, my God. 我的天
23:29 Oh, my God! My anime posters! We got robbed! 哦天啊 我的动漫海报 我们被抢劫了
23:34 Kris! Are you home? 克里希 你在家吗?
23:36 Yes. Where's the fire? What's going on? 在呢 哪儿着火了吗 发生了什么?
23:38 Have you not noticed that we've been robbed? 你没发觉我们被抢劫了吗?
23:39 I just tidied up a little bit. Relax. -Tidied up? -Yeah. -我就是做了个简单的清理 放松点 -清理?
23:44 Justice League? Darth Vader? SpongeBob? -是的 -正义联盟 黑武士 海绵宝宝?
23:45 Where are they? Are they okay? 它们都哪儿去了 它们怎么样了
23:47 They are safe. They're fine. 它们很安全 生活幸福
23:50 I just thought we could paint the living room. 我只是想 我们该把起居室粉刷一下了
23:54 Paint. 是为了粉刷啊
23:56 -Okay. -And redecorate. -好 -然后重新装潢
23:59 -Redecorate? -Yeah. -重新装潢? -是的
24:02 I thought you loved that stuff. Why would you want to do that? 我以为你喜欢那些东西 你为什么要重新装潢
24:04 Because it looks like we live in a frat house, Jeremy. 因为那让我们看起来好像 住在男生宿舍里 杰里米
24:06 -Oh, stop it. -We are adults, for Christ's sakes. -哦 别那么说 -我们是成年人了 看在上帝的份上
24:08 We make a decent living. -哦 别那么说 -我们是成年人了 看在上帝的份上 我们要过些得体的生活
24:10 I think it's time to invest and make this a real home. 我觉得是时候去投资 然后弄一个真正的家了
24:12 With matching dishes and glasses... 配上合适的盘子和杯子 以及…
24:18 ...and a new couch. 一个新沙发
24:20 Well, what's wrong with my couch? 啊 我的沙发有什么问题?
24:23 Baby, you pulled it out of a dumpster. 宝贝 你从一个垃圾堆里把它捡回来的
24:25 Yeah. 是啊
24:27 I'm pretty sure Annalisa was impregnated, like, right there. 我十分确信 安娜丽莎就是在那里受孕的
24:29 It's got cigarette burns, bong spills, there was the scabies scare of '06. 那里有香烟的痕迹 烟斗洒了 那里有个1906年遗留的疥疮瘢痕
24:33 -You're being dramatic. -No, I'm really not. -你太夸张了 -不 我真没有
24:34 Your aunt who tinkles when she laughs? 你有个大笑的时候会撒尿的姑姑
24:36 She pissed all over the couch last Christmas. 她在上个圣诞节尿了整个沙发
24:38 It's disgusting. We're like animals. 那非常地恶心 我们像是动物一样
24:41 I cleaned up the bong spill and the cigarette burns. 我把那些香烟痕迹清理掉了
24:43 This couch has history. 这沙发是有历史的
24:45 And now it is history. 现在 它要变成历史了
24:49 So here are some new ideas. 那么 这里有些新点子
24:51 I thought we could look it over. Research some new styles. 我觉得我们可以看看 搜索一下新的风格
24:55 Gotta zero in on a color palette. 把这像调色盘一样的屋子颜色 矫正一下
24:57 I know you like mauve. You know? 我知道你喜欢浅紫色 你知道吗?
25:00 There was that period you went through, where you were partial to salmon. 有一个时期 你打扮得像个鲑鱼一样
25:04 Yeah, I'd rather watch Letters to Juliet with you again. 是吗 我宁愿再跟你看一遍 写给朱丽叶的信
25:07 I know you would. Because you cried at the end when they got reunited. 我就知道你会这样想 因为你在他们重逢的时候哭出来了
25:10 I wasn't crying, okay? 我没有哭 好吗?
25:11 I was having an allergic reaction to the perfume in the theater. 我只是对那个电影院的香味过敏
25:14 You bought the soundtrack. It's a good soundtrack. -你买了电影原声带 -那可是个质量很好的原声带
25:17 Look, I'm really bad at this. Okay? 听着 我对这非常不在行
25:20 Please, can you do this? 求你了 你可以做这些吗?
25:22 -Without me? -Really? -不跟我一起 -真的吗?
25:24 -Really. -By myself? -真的吗? -就我一个?
25:27 Yeah. 是啊
25:29 -I trust you. -Awesome. -我相信你 -非常好
25:31 Okay, let me ask you a question. 好吧 我要问你个问题
25:33 Where is the last guy that you slept with in less than 90 days? 近90天里 你上一个睡过的男人 在哪儿?
25:36 You mean John? Hey! Baby! -你是说约翰? -嘿 宝贝!
25:38 What's up, girl? 怎么样了 女孩?
25:40 Hey, I had a great time the other night. 听着 那天晚上我过得很愉快
25:41 -Oh, did you, Alex? -Yeah, Melanie. I was gonna call you... -是吗 亚历克斯? -梅兰妮 是的 我正要给你打电话
25:44 Melanie? It's Mya, negro. 梅兰妮 我叫玛雅!你这个黑鬼
25:46 Yeah. I gotta go. So I'll call you. 哦 我得走了 那么我会给你电话的
25:48 I know you did not just call her Melanie. 我知道你不止叫她一个人梅拉妮
25:51 It's okay. I'm not even gonna let him get to me. 那挺好的 我不会让他影响到 我心情的
25:54 I am in a better place and I am on another level. 我比他强 而且现在 我已经到了另一个层面了
25:56 "The Player" vs. "The 90 Day Rule Girl" (“花花公子” 对战 “原则女”)
25:58 I don't know, Sonia. I feel like I have x-ray vision. 我不知道索尼娅 我感觉我像是有了点X光透视眼
26:00 Like, man goggles. 就好像有了筛选男人的法眼
26:02 We spend all this time complaining... 我们花费了那么多时间用来抱怨
26:03 ...about how guys don't want to be in relationships... 男人是多么的不愿意 有一段稳定的恋情
26:05 ...they just want to hook up. 他们只喜欢一夜情
26:07 But really, all along, we've had the power. 但实际上 我们一直都占有主动权
26:09 Right. We have? 是的 我们占有主动权吗?
26:11 Yes! We control the cookie. 当然 我们把握着甜心饼干
26:14 She who controls the cookie controls the game. 把握住甜心饼干的人 才能掌控整个游戏
26:16 Okay, I got it. What's the cookie? 好吧 我懂了 什么是甜心饼干?
26:20 -It's a metaphor. -For what? -那只是比喻 -比喻什么的
26:22 For.... 那个…
26:27 -Yes. The cookie! -The cookie! -对了 甜心饼干 -甜心饼干
26:29 I got it. The cookie! 我终于懂了 甜心饼干
26:30 I'm telling you, the power's in the cookie. 我告诉你吧 力量就在甜心饼干里
26:32 So how do we control the cookie? 那么 我们怎么才能控制住甜心饼干
26:35 By putting it in the cookie jar... 通过把甜心饼干放到饼干罐里
26:36 ...clasping the lid on tight, and leaving it in there. Okay. -拧紧盖子 就把它放在那儿 -好的
26:40 Until some little boy actually grows up and earns it. 直到这些小男孩们 足够成熟到可以赢得它
26:43 I get it. 我懂了 就好像我的一个表妹 有一个五次约会规则
26:44 It's kind of like when my cousin had the five-date rule. It was similar to that. 我懂了 就好像我的一个表妹 有一个五次约会规则 这两者挺像的
26:47 Oh, no. That's child's play. I'm thinking something a little bit more radical. 哦不 那只是小儿科 我想要更极端点
26:51 See, this is why you need to get the book, because it has a whole chapter on it. 看吧 这就是为什么你需要这本书 因为这里有关于 这事情的整整一个章节
26:54 "Getting The Respect That You Deserve: The 90-Day Rule." 得到你应得的尊重 90天规则
26:57 Are you high? 你疯了么?
26:58 -No. -Who is waiting 90 days? -没有 -谁会等待90天?
27:00 If it's good enough for the Fortune 500 company... 如果这规则适用于世界500强公司
27:02 ...it's good enough for me. 那么它就适用于我
27:04 See, when I worked at Ford Motor Company... 当我为福特公司工作的时候
27:06 ...there was a 90-day probation rule. 他们有个90天试用期的规定
27:08 I had to be on the job for 90 days before they gave me a benefit package. 在他们给我福利待遇之前 我需要在这个工作岗位做90天
27:11 Ford figured this, "Let's see how he performs. 福特的意思是 让我们看看他是怎么表现的
27:15 "If he comes in on time, if he proves himself, then we'll give him benefits." 如果他证明了他自己 我们就会给他福利待遇
27:20 So if Ford Motor Company waits 90 days to pass out their benefit package... 所以如果福特公司都能在 分发福利之前等待90天的话
27:25 ...why won't women wait? 为什么女人们不能等待呢?
27:27 You see, that's our problem. 看吧 那是我们自己的问题
27:28 It's that we keep giving it away to some Axe body spray wearing man-ho... 问题就在于我们一直被那拥有 雕塑般身材的牛郎欺骗
27:31 ...who thinks my name's Melanie. 他甚至以为我的名字是梅兰妮
27:33 But it doesn't matter, because a girl's got needs. 但是那不重要 因为女人也有需要啊
27:35 Listen to yourself. Do you really think you could wait 90 days? 听听你自己说的 你真的以为你能忍90天?
27:39 Yes. I spent six months dreaming about a guy... 是的 我花费了六个月时间 梦想着一个只在婚礼周末见到的男人
27:42 ...that I met once at a wedding weekend. 梦想着一个只在婚礼周末见到的男人
27:44 The one you had sex with at the beach? 那个跟你在海边做爱的男人
27:45 Yes, who never called. 是的 他之后再也没有打来电话
27:48 Yeah, so, I definitely think I could do 90 days. 是的 所以 我非常确定我能等待90天
27:50 Matter of fact, I could do 90 days before 90 days. 实际上 我能在90天之后再等90天
27:52 I am so sick and tired of men. Maybe I should start dating women. 我对男人感到厌烦和恶心 或者我应该开始跟女人约会了
27:55 My God, I'll give you 50 bucks if you guys kiss. 天啊 如果你们俩接吻 我会付你50美金
27:58 -But there has to be tongue. -Boy, get out of here! -不过必须是舌吻 -臭小子 滚开
28:00 Gave it a shot. 试试吗
28:01 What is wrong with the men of this generation? Like, what? 这一代的男人到底是怎么了 说真的怎么了
28:06 I ask myself that same question every day. 我每天都在问自己同一个问题
28:08 Whatever happened to respect for women? 他们对女性的尊重呢
28:10 Whatever happened to decorum? 他们的礼貌呢?
28:13 May I have the honor of buying you two lovely ladies a drink? 我能有幸为你们两位 可爱的女士买杯喝的吗?
28:16 Absolutely. And thank you for asking. 当然可以 谢谢
28:18 -We would like-- -Why? -我们想要 -为什么
28:20 Is it that you crave scintillating conversation? 是因为你渴望一场 火花四溅的对话
28:23 Or that you want to discuss the politics and nuances of the Chechnyan War? 还是你想要讨论一下政治 和车臣战争的细微差别
28:26 You know, I don't really discuss politics on the first encounter. 你知道 第一次见面 我通常不会讨论政治
28:28 -And neither do we. This is why I'm-- -Oh, no, I know what it is. -我们也不会 这就是为什么我 -哦不 我知道了
28:30 It's the visual thing, right? 是…是一见钟情是吗?
28:32 You saw me, you sexualized me, you wanted to get into my pants? 你看到了我 对我产生了性趣 想进入到我裤子里面
28:35 Absolutely not. -绝对不是的 -是吗 那么 又是什么呢?
28:36 Yeah, but then, what is it? Because, you know, you don't know me. -绝对不是的 -是吗 那么 又是什么呢? 因为 你知道的 你不认识我
28:40 I could be a psycho. 我可能是个精神病
28:42 I could be a serial killer. I could have 16 personalities. 我可能是个连环杀手 我可能有16种人格
28:46 -Let me get a Crown and Coke. -Got you covered. -给我一杯皇冠可乐 -正在做
28:48 And 16 of whatever she's having? 还有16杯她点的任何东西
28:51 My name is Zeke. 我叫齐克
28:59 Mya. 我叫玛雅
29:00 Nice to meet you, Mya. 很高兴认识你 玛雅
29:02 Day one, 89 more to go. 这是第一天 还有89天呢
29:06 Order for table 16! 给16桌的菜
29:08 Dominic. Valet's slammed. Go park some cars. 多米尼克泊车员撞车了 你去外面帮着停车
29:15 -Thank you. -Thanks. -谢谢你 -谢谢
29:40 Hey, that's my car! 喂 那是我的车
29:50 Who says you have to compromise? 谁说你需要将就
29:58 Okay, where's the window? 怎么开车窗
30:06 Window. Window, window. 车窗
30:08 Not the final destination. 这不是终点
30:11 Door open. 开门
30:12 Shit. 该死!
30:16 Hi.
30:17 If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were following me. 如果我没猜错的话 你是在跟踪我吗
30:21 No, just.... 没有 我只是
30:23 Just out for a drive, that's all. 我只是兜兜风 就这样
30:26 Have a safe drive. 那你悠着点
30:28 Well, wait. 等等
30:30 You changed your mind? 改变主意了
30:31 You think I could take you to dinner sometime? 改天我能请你吃饭吗
30:34 How's tomorrow night? 明天晚上如何呢?
30:37 We love the fact that you're a strong, confident woman with a fabulous job... 听着 我们乐意接受这个现实 你是个强大自信事业有成的女人
30:41 ...but we're men. 听着 我们乐意接受这个现实 你是个强大自信事业有成的女人 可是我们是男生
30:43 Our DNA is encoded to be the provider. 基因决定了我们是要养家糊口的
30:46 And if you don't ever let us feel like we're in control and necessary... 如果你从没让我们觉得我们处于上风
30:50 ...we're just not about to profess our love to you. 我们不会公然表达我们的爱的
30:52 I mean, we'll just find us a woman who actually makes us feel like a man. 我意思是 我们只是想找个 小鸟依人女人让我们觉得自己够男人
30:56 Yeah, a ho. 是啊 像是找个小姐
30:57 We're kind of like dogs, see, you pet us, we'll be loyal to you forever. 我们像狗 你想 你宠爱我们 我们就会永远忠诚
31:01 Yeah, dogs. There you go, Steve. 是啊 狗 就是这样 史蒂夫
31:05 I don't need that book. 我不需要这本书
31:14 Oh, yes! Yeah! 太棒了!耶!
31:18 Oh, honey. Jennifer's coming over tonight to babysit. 哦 亲爱的 珍妮弗今晚会照顾你
31:21 You're going to bingo with Grandma? 你要和奶奶玩填格子游戏吗?
31:23 -No, actually. I have a date. -Really? -不是啊 我有约会 -真的吗?
31:26 With a man or a woman? 和男人还是女人啊?
31:28 A man! Duke, why would you even ask me that? 男人啊 干吗还问我这个?
31:30 Because I overheard Grandma say that she was beginning to wonder. 我偷听到奶奶说她也许开始困惑了
31:35 You know I'm cool either way. 要知道你喜欢是男是女我都行啊
31:37 Yo, sorry I'm late. 不好意思我迟到了
31:38 -Yo, Bennett, get in the game, let's go. -What's up, man? -版纳德加入我们的游戏 来吧! -怎么了伙计?
31:41 I had the best night of my entire life last night. 昨天我度过了人生中最棒的一晚
31:43 -Is that right? -Unbelievable. -真的么? -难以置信
31:44 -Check ball. -I thought you got fired last night. -回止球 -你昨晚被烧了吧
31:45 That's all right. I'll make twice as much catering. 好吧 我会打双份工的 -好吧 回止球 -希望她是值得的
31:48 -All right. Play ball. -Hope she's worth it. -好吧 回止球 -希望她是值得的
31:49 What you gonna do with that? What you gonna do with that? -你要对它做什么 -你要对它做什么
31:51 Count it! 计分啊 从背后突击
31:53 Over the back! 从背后突击
31:55 See, I'm taking her to The Lounge. 我带她去休息室了
31:57 Maurice hooked me up with a private room... 莫里斯给我找了间包房
31:59 ...and all I gotta pay for is wine and a fat tip. 我只要付酒钱和优厚的小费
32:01 Nice. So you gonna be escorting her in that 2005 Honda Civic... 不错 所以你要开着 没有保险杠的本田思域2005
32:05 ...with the missing bumper or that $155,000 car she think you drive? 不错 所以你要开着 没有保险杠的本田思域2005 还是155,000 美元的豪车护送她
32:08 I'm just gonna level with her, I guess. 我想我该坦白
32:11 And tell her what? That you an unemployed prep cook? 坦白什么 你是给厨师打下手的吗?
32:13 Zeke, unemployed Culinary Institute graduate. We talked about this. 齐克待业烹调师 在校研究生我们就这样说
32:17 -Yes, that's not my point. -That's stupid. -我没那个意思 -这方法太次了
32:18 That's dumb, Dom. You trying to get some, you gonna have to lie. 这是下策 多米 但你要得到她 你就必须说谎
32:22 Listen, one time I told Gail I just won the lottery. 有一次我对科尔说我中了乐透
32:24 I need some gas money so I can go redeem the ticket. She gave me $20. 我需要些钱 我才能兑换彩票她给了我20美元
32:26 Don't lie to her. 别欺骗她
32:27 I don't want to lie to her. 我不想骗她
32:29 Okay, hold up. You don't have to lie. You omit. 好的 等等 你无须撒谎 只要适当忽略就好
32:32 Just, no, no, you omit. 你只要…不 你忽略就好
32:33 You just tell her you're a high-end chef that's in between gigs. 你就说你是个杰出却不得志的厨师 这是在演出的之间
32:36 Your car's in the shop. 你车泊在店里
32:38 She think you drive an expensive car... 她原以为你会开辆豪车
32:40 ...you're not driving it because it's in the shop. 而你没开 因为车在店里
32:41 Matter of fact, my cousin, he got a town-car company. I'll get you a town car. 其实我表兄 他有家林肯城市车公司 我帮你去借一辆
32:44 So all you gotta do is wine her, you dine her... 所以你只需跟她喝酒 吃饭
32:46 ...you tattoo your name in that ass, then you tell her the truth. 你把她迷得神魂颠倒 再告诉她真相
32:49 Gail thought I was an account executive and I met her in the mail room. 科尔以为我是个业务执行 我在收发室碰到她
32:51 I had mail in my hand. 我手里拿着信件
32:52 Yeah, but you became an account exec right after that. 是啊 你就从那一刻变成了业务执行
32:54 That had nothing to do with Gail. -那跟科尔无关 -她设计了与你会面
32:55 -She set up your interview. -No, she didn't. Thomas did. 不 她没有 是托马斯干的 不要打断我 马克
32:57 Don't cut me off, Mike. That's what Gail do, I don't like that. 不 她没有 是托马斯干的 不要打断我 马克 就是卡尔做的 我看不惯这事…
33:00 -Why's he so sensitive? -All right, Dom, either way... -他干吗这么敏感啊? -好吧 多米管了呢
33:02 ...once a woman's into you, she'll put up with anything. 女人一旦真的爱上你了 她就能忍受一切
33:04 -Trust me. -Only if you're putting it on her right. -相信我 -只要你把她做对了就行
33:08 All right. That's.... 好吧 那…
33:09 Come on, man. 加油啊!伙计
33:11 -I'm gonna go clean the ball off. -Bennett, just wipe it off. -我要清洗这些球 -版纳德 擦一下就好了
33:13 No, I got some sanitizer in my bag. 不行 我包里有消毒剂
33:27 Sorry, man. Wrong apartment. 对不起 您进错公寓了
33:31 That's my lucky chair. 那是我的幸运椅
33:33 What are you guys doing? 你们在干吗?
33:34 Baby! What do you think? 亲爱的 怎么样?
33:36 We spent the entire day at H.D. Buttercup and we decided to go... 我们在家具店商场逛了一天 我们挑了些现代中带点复古的家具
33:40 -...with modern with a mix of vintage. -"We"? 我们挑了些现代中带点复古的家具 -“我们”? -是啊 吉安尼我们的设计师
33:42 Yeah. Gianni, our designer. -“我们”? -是啊 吉安尼我们的设计师
33:46 Old out, new in, beautiful, eh? 旧的不去新的不来嘛 美绝了是吧?
33:52 I think it doesn't even look like our place, babe. 我觉得这都不像我们家了 宝贝
33:55 Exactly, it looks like grown-ups live here. 的确 它像成年人的房子
33:56 -I love it. -Stop! -我喜欢 -住手
33:59 Put the chair down. 把椅子放下
34:02 The lucky chair stays. 幸运椅要留着
34:06 Compromise. 好吧 我退一步
34:15 Fuck, what...? You speak Italian now? 我去 怎么 你会说意大利语了?
34:23 Oh, my God. 天啊
34:25 -That's your dress. -Yeah? -你准备穿这条 -是啊
34:27 Your ass looks great in that dress. 这条裙把你的臀部修饰得美极了
34:30 No, it's too sexy. 可是太性感了
34:31 There's no such thing. 才没有太性感这种事呢
34:33 Sonia, I want him to last 90 days, not 90 seconds. 索尼亚 我要他忍90天 不是90秒
34:37 I want to project "Keeper," not "Sports Fish." 我的目标是准女友 不是运动鱼
34:40 Okay, what the hell is a sports fish? 运动鱼是什么意思?
34:42 See, this is why you need to read the book! 你看 这就是你要多看书的原因
34:44 I don't want to read the book. 我不爱看书
34:45 Steve says that a guy only fishes for two reasons. 史蒂夫说人钓鱼只有两个原因
34:48 Number one, he fishes to eat. 一是钓来吃
34:50 That means he's looking for a keeper, somebody to take home... 换言之 他把你当准女友 会带回家
34:53 ...somebody to introduce to his mom, somebody to build a life with. 介绍给妈妈 然后与她建立家庭
34:57 Or two, he's looking for a sports fish. 二是他想找海里游的鱼
35:00 That means he's looking for a trophy, somebody to show off to his buddies... 也就是说 他想要一个战利品 可以在朋友面前显摆
35:03 ...put up on the wall as a prize. 作为战绩挂在墙上
35:05 But you gotta be careful with that one, because he's gonna throw that one back. 但你要注意第二种情况 因为他会把你扔回海里
35:08 Okay. 好了
35:14 Okay. 好了
35:17 How do I look? 我看起来怎么样
35:18 Like a keeper. With a great ass. 准女友 有美臀的准女友
35:21 -Yeah? -Yes! -真的吗 -说真的
35:22 Right. Now, the question is, is he? 好 现在的问题就是 他是不是合格呢?
35:26 Now I just need my hit list. 就缺我的黑名单了
35:28 Now, what the hell is a hit list? 好吧 黑名单又是什么杰宝玩意儿
35:29 Will you get your wine off my hit list? 能把你的酒从我黑名单上拿开吗
35:31 Girl, you're crazy. 丫头 你疯了吧
35:33 This is where I wrote down my strategic dos and don'ts for my date tonight. 这是我写的战略我今晚的约会 什么该做 什么不该做都在上面
35:37 Okay, you know you sound like you're going to war, right? 好吧 听你说得像要去打仗
35:39 -Yes, girl, because love is a battlefield. -Oh, boy. 可不是么 情场如战场 老天
35:42 Steve says you have to set the requirements very high... 史蒂夫说你必须把条件设高一点
35:45 ...before you even get in the car... 甚至在你上他车之前
35:46 ...because you don't want to become Chirp-chirp Girl. 因为你不想成为一个主动的女孩
35:48 A what? -什么女孩? -主动的
35:49 Chirp-chirp. He just hits the locks and you hop in. 他只不过开锁让你上他车
35:51 He don't even have to open the door. 他都不需要开车门
35:53 I don't see nothing wrong with being a Chirp-chirp Girl. 我不觉得主动的女孩有什么不好
36:10 You look beautiful. 你今天太美了
36:12 Thanks. 谢谢夸奖
36:14 Amazing. 很高兴
36:21 Sweet! 你真贴心
36:22 Where to? Goddamn, look how small your skirt is. 要去哪啊 天啊!看那裙子短的
36:28 Right. Unprofessional. 好吧 这么叫太不专业了
36:30 Sorry, sir, take it out of my tip. 不好意思 先生 从我小费里扣吧
36:44 It's open. 门解锁了
36:47 It's open. 门解锁了
36:49 I don't go out on dates with guys who don't open the door for me. 我不跟不给我开车门的男人约会
36:52 -Really? -Really. -是吗? -是的
36:53 -Seriously? -Yes. -当真吗? -当真啊
36:55 Aw, man! 你说的
37:00 No, he didn't. 他不是吧
37:06 Got you! 骗到你了吧
37:10 Your chariot awaits. Thank you. -您的车在等您 -谢谢
37:14 Funny guy, huh? 真逗啊 呵呵
37:16 I do okay. 我表现不错吧
37:21 Look, I think there's a few basic questions that every woman should ask a man... 每个女人 都该问男人几个基本问题
37:25 ...to determine two things: If this guy has a plan for you... 来确认两件事 这男人对你是认真的
37:28 ...or if this guy is just gonna play with you. 还是只是玩玩
37:31 My short-term goals? 我的短期目标是
37:33 What, you mean like tomorrow? 什么?你意思是明天的计划吗?
37:39 -I need a bong hit. -To answer your question... 我要抽管水烟 关于你的问题
37:41 ...I guess my long-term goals and short-term goals are the same thing. 我想我的长期目标 与我的短期目标一致
37:44 How so? 怎么会?
37:46 Well, my entire life, it's always been about hard work and improving myself... 这一生 我总是努力工作 提升自己
37:51 ...and I guess what I'm looking for now is... 但我想我现在追求的
37:53 ...you know, someone I can share it with. 是有个人能分享我的成就
37:57 -So-- -So have you-- -所以… -所以你…
37:58 You go ahead, you go. You go. 你先说 说吧 说吧
38:03 What are your short-term goals? 你的短期目标是什么?
38:06 You know what? I'd like to skip dinner and get right to dessert. 你知道么 我想跳过晚餐直接吃甜点
38:11 That's where it started... 那就是一切开始的源头
38:12 -...you know? -Really? 是吗 真的吗?
38:13 This is a great choice. 这是个明智的选择
38:16 Thank you. Thank you. 谢谢你 谢谢
38:18 So Lauren, tell me more about yourself. What do you do? 萝伦 多跟我说说你 你是做什么的
38:21 I'm in management. 我是管理人员
38:23 For a media company. Yeah. But I don't wanna talk about me, my work. 供职于一家传媒公司 但我不想谈我的工作
38:27 Long week. 但我不想谈我的工作 说来话长
38:29 So tell me about you. What do you do? 说说你自己 你是做什么的
38:32 I'm a chef. 我是大厨
38:35 Really? Where? 是吗 在哪里
38:37 Well, I'm actually... 事实上
38:39 -...deciding between two different offers. -That good, huh? 我正在犹豫要去哪家餐厅就职 这么优秀啊你
38:44 Yeah. But I don't wanna-- I kinda don't want to jinx it, you know? 是啊 但我不想 不想坏了运气什么 你懂的
38:49 No, I get it. No, don't, you shouldn't. 我理解 那就到此为止吧
38:53 Okay, you know what? Let's not even talk about work anymore. 你知道吗 最好不要再聊工作了
38:56 Yeah, let's not. 嗯 不聊比较好
38:58 So, what are your views on relationships? 你对两人的相处之道怎么看
39:01 Or your long-term goals. Either one. 或者说说你的长期目标 二选一
39:09 To be honest, I really want to open my own restaurant one day. 说真的 哪天我想开自己的餐厅
39:14 Sorry, that's work. 对不起 我又谈到工作了
39:17 No, that's a dream. 不 这是梦想
39:20 We can talk about dreams. Dreams are good. 我们聊梦想吧 这个话题好
39:22 It's nice to hear a woman actually say that. 从一位女性嘴里听到这话很享受
39:26 I just believe you can make any dream come true... 我相信你能达成一切理想
39:30 ...if you're willing to work hard enough to get it. 如果你真的为之奋斗的话
39:34 I couldn't agree with you more. 完全同意
39:37 -Cheers. -Salud. -干杯 -干杯
39:51 Remember when we were in college and we used to get... 记得在大学时我们太嗨了
39:54 ...so high and talk for hours? 然后谈天说地聊了好几个小时?
39:57 Yeah. 记得啊
40:00 Like about our dreams, and like our plans and our goals. 憧憬梦想 设定目标计划
40:05 And time travel. 还会玩时空之旅
40:07 Like, what do you think about the future, Jeremy? 比如你对未来有什么想法 杰里米
40:10 I don't think we'll be riding around in hovercrafts or anything, but droids. 我认为我们将来 不会乘着腾空船什么的 但我们会有机器人
40:16 Definitely droids. There better be droids. 必须的 有了机器人生活更美好
40:19 No, I mean, like your future, Jeremy. 不 我意思是你的未来 杰里米
40:22 What are your long-term goals, Jeremy? 你的长期目标是什么 杰里米?
40:28 Who are you, Oprah? 你怎么了 奥普拉附体吗?
40:31 You're funny. 你真逗
40:34 I just have this amazing idea of a rocker, chic kinda look... 我对时尚摇滚的设计风格 有点奇异的想法 有点…
40:39 ...so, it's really exciting. 那很激动人心呢
40:40 -No, that is exciting. -Yeah. -那是很激动人心的 -是的
40:42 Yeah.
40:44 So...
40:45 ...what are some of your long-term goals? 你的长期目标是什么?
40:49 Kind of a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants kind of guy, you know? 跟着感觉走吧
40:53 Oh, okay. 好吧
40:55 That's cool. 那样很酷
41:00 Oh, turn that up. Turn that up, turn that up. 调高音量 调高 再调高
41:03 That is my-- Yeah. 那是我的…
41:06 -You know these guys? -Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. -你知道这些人啊 -是啊 知道
41:10 My band opened for them once. 我的乐队为他们做过开场秀
41:13 You have a band? 你有乐队?
41:14 Had. 有过
41:16 Had a record deal for a second. 曾有过唱片合约
41:18 Let me hear your CD. Come on! 让我听听你的唱片 快点
41:20 What makes you think that I have a CD? 你怎么认定我有唱片
41:22 I don't know anybody who's been in an R&B band... 我从来没听说过 哪个曾是RB乐队的人
41:24 ...who doesn't have their own CD in their car. 他车里没有自己的唱片
41:26 Wow, I feel so unique right now, it's crazy. 哇哦 此刻顿觉自己是个奇葩 太疯狂了
41:29 -That's why you're reaching for it. -Yeah. -你这不就伸手去拿了么 -是的
41:32 Let me see it. 让我看看
41:37 That is crazy. 太激动了
41:38 Hey, at least I didn't have a Jheri curl. 至少那时我没有弄杰里卷
41:40 What? 是吗?
41:42 Play me your favorite track. 放你的至爱单曲
41:45 Wow. 哇哦
41:48 Please say a command. 请说出指令
41:50 CD. Play track... 唱片播放
41:54 ...seven. 第七首
41:55 Playing track seven. 放第七首
41:57 Last night I had a dream about a dream 昨晚我做了个梦中梦
42:03 About you 关于你
42:08 You wrote this? 你写的吗?
42:10 Now every time I think it seems to be About you 现在每次想起 它都跟你有关
42:20 This is beautiful. 很美
42:21 One minute I was over love 前一刻我已经不想再爱
42:26 A second later I was a part of us 下一秒我却已经变成我们
42:30 Who was she? Who? -她是谁? -谁?
42:33 The girl who broke your heart. 伤你心的女孩
42:35 What makes you think a girl broke my heart? 你为什么会认为 一个女孩伤了我的心?
42:38 Track seven. 这首歌告诉我的
42:44 I left that all on the track. 我把所有的感情都留在歌里了
42:46 Last night I had a dream about a dream About... 昨晚我做了一个梦中梦关于
42:56 Oh, my God. 我的天
43:01 -Okay. Okay, wait, wait, wait. -What's wrong, what's wrong? -好的 停 -怎么了 发生什么了?
43:04 It's just-- I don't do this on the first date. 只是 我不想在第一次约会就这样
43:07 Okay, I understand. 好吧 我理解你
43:09 I'm a Christian too. I respect that, you know, and-- 我也是基督徒 我尊重它 而且
43:15 I had a really wonderful time. 我度过了一段非常美好的时光
43:17 Me too. 我也是
43:20 Well, thanks. 谢谢你
43:27 -There. I accomplished it. -Accomplished what? -好的 我完成了 -完成什么了?
43:30 My real short-term goal. 我真真正正的短期目标
43:32 You dog. 你个狡猾的家伙
43:34 So listen. 听着
43:35 I've been thinking about this all night. I want you to meet my mother. 我一整晚都在想这个 我要你见我母亲
43:38 -Really? -It would really mean a lot to me. -真的吗 -这对我真的很重要
43:41 Well... 好吧
43:43 ...I'd like you to meet my son. 我想让你见见我儿子
43:45 I would love that. Just name the time and place-- 我很乐意 到时候告诉我时间地点
43:49 Hi, I'm Duke. Did you touch my mama? 你好 我是杜克 你是不是碰了我妈妈?
43:52 Whoa, no. It was PG, little homey, not even PG-13. 没有 小鬼头 这可是老少咸宜的接触 连家长指导等级都不算
43:55 Sure. You like video games? 当然 你喜欢电子游戏
43:58 Have you ever played Street Racer Three? 你玩过街头赛车三吗?
43:59 -No. -Then you haven't lived, my man! 没有 那你就等于没活过 大哥
44:05 You have a good night, all right, Candace? 晚安 卡丹
44:07 Good night. Thank you. 晚安 谢谢你
44:08 -It's nice to meet you, Duke. Make sure-- -Nice to meet you too. -很高兴认识你 杜克 确认一下… -我也是
44:12 I really had a nice time tonight. 我今晚真的很愉快
44:14 I had a really good time too. 我也是
44:23 Okay, okay, okay. 好了
44:24 This is officially good night. 今晚…真的棒极了
44:28 Okay, you know what? I could use a nightcap. -好吧 -你知道吗 我想来杯睡前酒
44:32 -A nightcap. -Yeah. -睡前酒 -是的
44:34 Yeah. There's this really nice bar around the corner. 是啊…街角有家很不错的酒吧
44:38 -You should have fun. -What-- So it's like that? -你应该去试试 -什么 所以就这样了?
44:41 You have no idea. 你不明白的
44:43 So how long are we talking before I get invited up? 那我们需要聊多久 我才能受邀允许进屋?
44:47 Five dates. 五次约会之后吧
44:49 For a nightcap. 才准许发一杯睡前酒
44:52 Good night. 晚安
44:58 This bitch is crazy. 这女人疯了
45:20 Morning, beautiful. 早上好 美女
45:23 Hi. 你好
45:25 Thanks. 谢谢
45:28 -I made you breakfast. -Seriously? -我给你做了早餐 -真的吗?
45:31 Yeah. 是啊
45:32 -From my kitchen? -Let me take that. -在我厨房做的吗? -我帮你拿
45:36 It's a simple eggs Florentine, but with a twist... 就是个简单的佛罗伦萨鸡蛋 没做好
45:38 ...because I used the ingredients from your Thai takeouts. 因为我用了你泰式外卖里的原料
45:41 -Simple? This looks amazing. -Well, let me know what you think. -简单吗 这看起来很精美 -让我知道你在想什么
45:46 This is so good. 太美味了
45:49 Yeah? Well, I love a woman who can eat. 是吗 我爱会吃的女人
45:52 And I love a man who can cook. 我爱会做饭的男人
45:54 Maybe you'll let me do it again for you sometime. 也许下次你可以让我再做一回
45:58 Juice, please? 给我递一下果汁好吗?
46:01 A little spicy? 有点辣吧?
46:06 Thanks. 谢谢
46:10 Who's that? 那是谁?
46:12 That's my best friend, Candace. 我好友 叫卡丹
46:14 -Okay. -And my godson, Duke. 好吧 还有我干儿子 杜克
46:17 You know, you're not exactly what I picture when I hear the word "godmother." 你知道吗? 你跟我想象中"干妈"的形象不太像
46:23 Thank God for that. 万幸
46:33 You let yourself in again, huh? 你又不请自来了是吧
46:36 I didn't expect you to be here. I figured you'd be tiptoeing around her place. 我没想到你在家 我估摸着你不是该 在她家里蹑手蹑脚的准备开溜么
46:39 Well, first of all, I live here, not you. 第一 我住在这儿 不是你
46:41 And second, she has this five-date rule before I get invited up. 第二 她有个五次 约会之后才允许我进门的守则
46:45 Can you believe that? I'm the Negro Gigolo, the original Nigolo. 你相信吗 我是黑人舞男 舞男鼻祖
46:48 Five dates? What, is she some type of Farrakhan Muslim or something? 五次约会 这是什么 她是法拉堪那样的穆斯林还是什么?
46:51 She's a diva. 她是天后
46:52 She literally refuses to walk through a door unless I open it for her. 要是我不给她开车门 她还真的不肯坐进去
46:55 Gail used to do that. Gail used to get on my nerves with that. 卡尔以前也这样 她常让我神经紧张
46:58 "Get the door for me. How am I walk in and you ain't open the door?" 帮我开门 你不给我开我怎么进去
47:01 "My hands hurt. You better open that goddamn door!" 我手残了 你最好自己开那扇破门
47:04 -That's why I'm gonna end it right now. -Yeah, you need to. 所以我及时结束了我们的关系 是 必须的
47:06 Because you don't need her. You got me, and what we got is special. 因为你不需要她了 你有了我 我们是特别的
47:09 Open her door. 替她开门
47:10 It's 2012. Come around and open my door. 都已经2012年了 过来开我的门
47:13 I don't know, Sonia, I just felt like a different woman. 我不知道 索尼亚 我觉得自己像是个不同的女人了
47:15 I felt so in control and strong, and-- 感觉一切尽在掌握 自己那么强大 那么…
47:18 -What about him? -Well, I think-- -那他呢? -好吧 我想…
47:20 Zeke - Are U available for dinner tomorrow night? (齐克 明天晚上有空和我吃晚餐吗?)
47:24 It's him. 是他发的消息
47:26 "Are you available for dinner tomorrow night?" 明天晚上有空和我吃晚餐吗?
47:29 -Well, are you? -Well, I do believe that I am. -那你有空么 -我的确也有空
47:32 But I do not go out with guys who ask me via text. 但我不跟用短信邀请的人出去
47:37 She trippin'. 她反应很快
47:39 You know, Gail always suggested them egg whites... 卡尔总是建议他们吃蛋白
47:41 ...she said they was better for you. 她说吃蛋白比较健康
47:42 Hey, can you put a shirt on while you cooking, man? 喂 做饭时能套件汗衫么 同志?
47:46 Look at these hours. 猜我怎么了
47:48 What you come in here glowing for like you're pregnant? 你怎么散发着充满孕味的光芒
47:50 My boys. 好哥们儿
47:52 Hey, you got some. Oh! On the first date? 嘿 有收获啊 第一次约会就有收获
47:55 -Homey scored. -Yeah, I did. -好哥们儿加一分 -是啊 有收获
47:58 And I'm totally screwed. 我彻底陷进去了
48:00 We never once talked about my job. 我们一次都没聊到工作
48:02 -You really like him. -I really do. -你真的喜欢他 -是啊
48:05 I don't even know how much he makes. 我都不知道他工资多少
48:07 And you know what? I don't care! 不过呢 我不在乎
48:09 I believe in his dreams. 我相信他的梦想
48:11 She thinks I'm a chef on the rise. 她以为我是个冉冉升起的主厨
48:13 With a cold-ass Benz. 有辆拉风的奔驰
48:14 And a sexy limo driver. I looked good last night. 还有惹火的贵宾司机 我昨晚帅爆了
48:16 I had the hat cocked to the side. 我的帽子都翘起来了
48:17 Guys, she's going to run when I tell her the truth. 同志们 我要是说实话她会逃走的
48:20 Whatever you do, you don't tell her the truth. 不管怎样 千万别说实话
48:22 -Thank you. -You delay. -多谢 -你拖延着再说
48:23 Hell, I wouldn't tell her until she was in her third trimester. 该死 要是我就到预产期才告诉她
48:25 -Yeah, I can't do that. -Dom, I know you, okay? -好吧 我可做不到 -多米我懂你 好吧
48:27 And you're trying to grow a conscience here. Trust me on this one. 你是老实人 但信我没错
48:30 Honesty is overrated, man. Hey, that's in the Bible. Old Testament. 这世道谁还这么老实啊 哥们儿 嘿 老实是上帝的遗嘱 老掉牙了
48:34 I just don't want a relationship based on lies. 我不想我们的关系建立在谎言之上
48:37 That's called marriage. 婚姻才是建立在谎言之上的
48:38 Dom, you don't fool me. I know what this is about. This is about sex. 多米 别骗我了 我知道你的意思 还不是为了做爱
48:41 You didn't do what you were supposed to do in the bedroom. 你在闺房里没找到你想要的
48:43 That's why you walk through here with your shoulders all slouched... 所以你才跑来这里怂
48:46 ...and your self-esteem all low. 连自尊都掉了一地
48:47 It's true. When you don't smash right, the insecurities come out on you. 是真的 就像你如果绝杀失败 安全感就会消失的
48:50 You know what he did? He gave it a LD. Lazy Doodle. That's exactly what he did. 你知道他怎么了 他被忽悠了 被女的给忽悠了 那才是事实真相
48:54 Right. You gotta put it down like the right enforcement. 没错 你应该全力拿下 就像法律强制一样
48:57 I can't do this no more. I'm done. I'm done with this. 我不想再这样了 不要 我不想再看见了
48:59 Like, dude, put a shirt on. It's us! There's no one else here, just us! 哥们儿穿件衣服好么 这里没别人就我们俩好么
49:04 So you're telling me she's got a son? 那个 你说 她有个儿子吗?
49:06 Yeah! Duke. He's six years old. An amazing kid, full of energy. 是啊 杜克 六岁了 很不错的小孩活力四射的
49:10 That's an awful lot of responsibility, baby. 那是很沉重的责任啊 孩子
49:12 Well, she's a really responsible woman, Ma. 哦 她是个很有责任感的女人 妈
49:14 I'm not talking about her, I'm talking about you. 我不是在说她 我在说你
49:17 You really think you got what it takes to date a single mother? 你真的觉得你有能力 承担一个单身妈妈么?
49:21 Well, I was raised by a single mother, wasn't I? 你不就是单身妈妈啊 是么
49:25 Oh, but I'm one of a kind, baby. 哦 我是独一无二的 孩子
49:27 Trust me, Ma. You are going to love her. 相信我 妈 你会喜欢她的
49:33 Thank God! 谢天谢地
49:35 Somewhere familiar. 终于有一个熟悉的地方
49:37 Some place that hasn't changed, that still looks the same. 一个从未改变 始终如一的地方
49:39 Yo, J, what's wrong with you? 唷 J 你怎么了?
49:41 My Fortress of Solitude has morphed into a damn Bed, Bath and Beyond. 我那隐居用的堡垒 已经蜕变成 一张床一个浴缸 甚至更加坑爹
49:45 -What does that mean? -I'm telling you, he talks in code. -什么玩意儿啊? -我说 他说话要破解密码的
49:47 Listen, Kristen, she redecorated. 听着 克里斯汀她重新装修了
49:49 Redecorated? Why didn't you say that? 重新装修 说什么呢你
49:51 No, no, no, she didn't redecorate. She obliterated. 不 是重新装修 是扼杀一切了
49:54 Every trace of my identity, gone! My anime posters... 一丝一毫我鲜明的个性 都不复存在了 我的动漫海报
49:57 ...Battlestar Galactica shot glasses that you used to like, it's all gone. 太空堡垒卡拉狄加的镜头 你们超爱的各种眼镜 也不复存在了
50:01 May I? -我要喝 -等等 她连问都没问
50:02 Wait a minute. She ain't even ask you? She just threw your stuff out? -我要喝 -等等 她连问都没问 就全都扔了?
50:04 -That's some takeover shit right there. -That's crazy. -喝你自己的酒去 -太扯了吧
50:07 I was starting to feel like someone else. 我觉得自己都快不是自己了
50:09 Someone warm and modern with a smattering of vintage. 一个炽热而现代 又透漏着复古气质的人
50:12 That's probably your lips tingling. It's a STD. 嘴唇刺痛了没 得性病了吧 你刚才喝的是齐克的酒
50:15 You just put your mouth on Zeke's drink. 你刚才喝的是齐克的酒
50:17 -And she threw away my couch! -Thank God! -她还把我的沙发扔了 -谢天谢地
50:20 Hail Kristen! 向克里斯汀致敬
50:22 -That couch has a lot of memories, guys. -Is that what that smell was? -那沙发有好多回忆呢 -哥们儿 那以前就那味儿么
50:24 -Yeah, all of us got laid on that couch. -Twice. -是啊 我们都在那沙发上做过 -人家做了两次呢
50:27 -You had that couch since college, right? -Yes! 那沙发大学就跟着你了
50:29 That's some white boy shit. 对啊 是白人学长留下来的
50:30 -No, that's some Jeremy shit. -No, that's some white boy shit. -不对是杰里米留下的 -不对就是白人学长的
50:32 I graduated college, I got rid of my couch. 我毕业之后 就把我沙发留在宿舍了
50:35 What college did you go to? 你哪儿毕业的?
50:36 DeVry, Class of February. Valedictorian. 德瑞大学 春季毕业班 离校演讲
50:39 Whose side are you on? 你站谁那边的?
50:40 Ain't no brother on the planet gonna let no fine-ass sista... 地球上没有人会在大学时期
50:42 ...sit on no stinky-ass couch from college. 让挫女坐在好沙发上的
50:44 -Preach, boy! -It don't matter what happen... -说的好 哥们儿 -不管怎么样
50:46 ...you go and you find a way to get that furniture, figure how to pay for it later. 你都要想个办法 把家具钱付了
50:49 Yeah, don't do that, though. That's called negro shit. Don't ever do that. 是啊 别这样 别给黑人丢脸 千万别
50:51 That is negro shit! 就是 别丢脸
50:53 You guys do that a lot. You pay for something you can't afford. 你们还说我 你们不也是打肿脸充胖子
50:55 Ced, you couldn't even afford your wedding! 赛德 你当初连婚都结不起
50:57 I'm making my payments. 谁说我结不起
50:59 Listen, Kristen is a great girl. 听着 克里斯汀是个好女孩
51:00 Don't mess up something good over a damn couch, all right? 别为个破沙发而荒废了一段感情 好吗?
51:03 Something's up. 总觉得有事发生了
51:05 The game was on... 比赛开始了
51:07 ...but not the one we were watching. 不是电视上的比赛
51:09 While we were sitting there on our asses watching the game... 我们傻坐着看电视的时候
51:11 ...our team was getting destroyed. 男性的队伍开始慢慢被击垮
51:13 The other team was drawing up plays, planning their strategies... 对手正在规划战术 计划套路
51:17 ...and plotting their next moves. 并制定下一步行动的时候
51:20 Hey, you. 嘿 你啊
51:22 You still up? 还没睡呢?
51:23 I thought you were sleeping. 以为你睡了呢
51:27 -I couldn't put this down. -Yeah. -这书让人欲罢不能啊 -是啊
51:29 Jeremy didn't even know he was under attack. 杰里米根本不知道他给攻击了
51:32 God, it was such a trip. I ran into Sarah's little brother. 天啊 累死我了都 我去找了莎拉的弟弟
51:37 And he told me he got a job at Neversoft. 他说他在微软公司找了份工作
51:41 Cool. Yeah. -酷 -是啊
51:43 Weren't you offered an internship there once? 他们是不是也邀请你去实习过?
51:47 Yeah. Turned it down for a real job. 是 但我为了 一个真正的工作拒绝了
51:50 Right, yeah, that junior level one that you're still in. 是啊 是 你现在不还是初级员工么?
51:53 What? 什么?
52:00 My brothers didn't even know they were at war. 我哥们儿深陷战争但毫无察觉
52:02 They were lost in the honeymoon phase. 我哥们儿深陷战争但毫无察觉 他们在蜜月期的幸福里迷失了
52:05 They were too busy enjoying the ride. 忙着相爱管不了其他的
52:07 All right, who's hungry? 好啦 谁肚子饿啊
52:09 I'm hungry, but, babe, babe! 我饿了 嘿 亲爱的 让让
52:11 Damn! Look at that ass! 天啊 美臀啊
52:13 That's nice. She's hot. 不错啊 她挺性感的
52:14 Guys, come on, that's somebody's daughter. 同志们 拜托 人家好歹是女生
52:16 Wait, that's the baby mama? That's Candace? 等等 这就是那个单身妈妈 那个卡丹?
52:18 -That is Candace. -I know the baby mama. -这就是我的卡丹 -我认识她
52:23 No, she's Lauren's best friend. 别想歪 她是劳伦的好闺蜜
52:25 So apparently they play basketball three times a week at the Y... 他们每个星期在Y球场打三次球
52:28 ...and Dominic says that Michael is the most successful guy he knows. 多米还说了 迈克尔是他见过的最成功的人了
52:32 -Really? -You scored! -真的 -你赚大了
52:34 I did well? You know what... 还行吧 你知道么
52:36 ...Michael said Dominic is a really amazing chef. 迈克尔说多米真是个很棒的主厨
52:38 I know, I know! I love food. 我知道 我知道 我是个吃货
52:41 -Oh, no, bitch. -What? -哦 对了 小贱人 -怎么了?
52:43 We can double date. 我们可以一起四个人约会啊
52:47 -Oh, that's not good. -That's not good at all. -不妙啊 -大事不妙啊
52:50 -Let's go play basketball, guys. -Yeah, let's do that. -先打球吧 -好的 打球吧
52:52 Whatever you do, don't double date. 干什么都别一起约会
52:54 That's right. Damn, Ced. 没错 赛德
52:57 Really? 开玩笑吧
52:58 I was in the middle of getting dressed. 我正换着衣服呢
53:00 J, you're losing the game for us! 看 输了都怪你
53:02 -Me? -Yo, you are killing us right now. 我吗? 你可把我们害惨了
53:05 I'm setting screens, you gotta be using the screens. 我说好了计划 你就找我的计划打球
53:06 -You shot one for 27. -The shot I made was a game changer, J. -你上场27分钟就进一个球 -进一个改变全局啊
53:09 That's it, I'm done. New teams next week. I'm not being on his team anymore. 就这样了 下个星期 重新分队 我不要跟他一队
53:12 I'm not the one that's not coming off the picks! 我不是给你们选来选去的
53:14 Excuse me, y'all done here? We want to play some full court. 不好意思 你们打完了么 我们队想打全场
53:17 -Oh, yeah. -Y'all take it. 打完了 你们打吧
53:18 No, no, no, we're not. 没呢 没呢 没打完呢
53:20 Got a lot more basketball to play over here, fellas... 我们还要打一会儿 哥们儿 看起来你选错了
53:22 ...so looks like you picked the wrong court to try and come and take. 半场来欺负老实人啊
53:24 We just ran three games! 我们都打3场了
53:25 -Yeah, Ced, we're good. -No, we're not. -是啊 赛德 我们走吧 -不 不走
53:27 We are not good. Sorry. 就是不走 抱歉了
53:30 Yo, so y'all stepping off or what? 你们到底走不走?
53:32 Yeah, we were stepping. I was stepping on-- 走 我们这就走 正在走
53:33 Stepping off? Who are you, Shaft? 走 你谁啊你 你个等换班的?
53:35 How about you get some language from this year? 怎么不学着说说人话呢?
53:37 So why don't you, and the stronger version of Prince... 怎么不拉着你的四肢发达的王子
53:40 ...go back down to that side of the court and do what y'all was doing? 回到你的半场 打你的破球
53:42 Because if y'all want the court, you'll play us for the court like real men. 你要是想打全场 就和我打一场比赛 做个真汉子吧
53:45 So y'all want to play for it. 你们要跟打一场么
53:46 You heard what I said. 我说得很清楚了
53:48 Am I stuttering, huh? Suckers. 我没口吃吧 二货
53:50 -They're not gonna punk us. We men! -Ced. 他们能拿我们怎么样汉子们 赛德
53:52 -People come in here, think they got us. -You are not serious. 总有人来挑事以为自己跟什么似的 你别开玩笑了
53:56 I am serious. It is what it is. 谁跟你开玩笑 就这样了
53:59 Oh, shit. 死定了
54:03 I thought it was just two of them. I did not see the rest. 我以为就他俩 我没看见剩下的那些
54:06 Turn around and say you're sorry. 转过去跟人家赔礼道歉
54:08 -It's too late. We're in it. -Apologize. -太晚了比赛吧 -道歉
54:10 No, I'm not apologizing for shit. Michael, this is when you be a man! 不要 我才不要跟他们道歉 迈克尔还是我们雄起做汉子吧
54:13 All right, guys. If a game is what you want, a game is what you gonna get. 好吧 同志们 你们想比赛 那就比赛吧
54:17 -You wanna play? -Ced, let him go! 好吧 同志们 你们想比赛 那就比赛吧 赛德 还是算了吧
54:19 -Cedric! -What are you doing? 赛德 还是算了吧
54:22 -You okay? -Get up, get up. 没事吧 起来快起来
54:24 So embarrassing. 丢死人了
54:27 -I really tried to take it. -It was obvious. 我真的很用力的拿球了 看得出来
54:29 I really did. I swear to God, I gave it everything I had. 真的很用力了 我发誓吃奶的劲儿都使了
54:31 I sprained my esophagus in the last game, so I'm gonna sit this one out. 我刚才扭伤了我的食道 这一场我就不打了
54:34 Your esophagus is in your throat. 食道在你胸腔里
54:35 -Shut up, Bennett. -Zeke, we need six. -闭嘴版纳德 -齐克 要六个人才行
54:38 Zeke! Forget Zeke, we'll just have to play with five. 齐克 算了 只能五个人打了
54:40 Listen, we are men. We tie our shoes up the same way they do. 听着 大家都是男人 大家都是一样系鞋带的
54:43 -Yeah, their shoes are bigger. -It don't matter. Be a man! -只不过人家的鞋比较大 -这不是重点 重点是我们是男人
54:45 When I come out this, you better say who you got and you better mean it. 我认真的 你 最好点一个守着 认真的
54:48 Let's go. D up. 开始吧 比赛开始了
54:51 I got her. Let's go. Get yours. I got mine. 我守她 开始吧 各守各的
54:54 We welcome you all to the JW Marriott Los Angeles. 让我代表洛杉矶万豪酒店欢迎您
54:57 But then, the bubble burst. 但是 梦幻的泡沫破碎了
54:59 For Dominic, the tables turned on Tuesday afternoon. 对于多米来说 周二下午厄运就来了
55:02 --the best year in your company's history. 贵公司史上最好的业绩
55:04 She is not just the youngest COO you've ever had, but the very best. 她不只是你见过的 最年轻的首席执行官 同样是最优秀的
55:10 Ladies and gentlemen, Lauren Harris. 女士们先生们 欢迎劳伦哈里斯
55:14 Thank you. 谢谢
55:20 Aw, shit. 该死!
55:23 -Mom? There you go. -Hey! -妈妈 来吧 -嘿
55:25 Mom, I would like you to meet Candace. Hi! -妈 让我来引荐 这是卡丹 -嗨
55:28 For Michael, the bomb dropped on Wednesday. 对于迈克尔降临在周三的晚上
55:31 I've heard so much about you. 我对您早有耳闻
55:32 Well, I've heard nothing about you! 是么 我怎么没听说过你
55:35 We just talked about her last night at dinner. What are you-- 我们昨晚还聊她来着 你怎么…
55:37 -Well, I don't remember. -Mom, why are you-- -好吧 我不记得了 -妈 你干吗?
55:40 I don't remember. 就是不记得了嘛
55:45 It's beautiful, your home. Just gorgeous. It's great. 很美啊 你的家很优雅很棒
55:54 Oh, wow, look! Look at this, I have this exact same frame for my son! 看啊 看这个 我儿子也有个一模一样的 一模一样的
56:00 Oh, that's right, you're the one with the child. 哦想起来了你是那个带孩子的
56:04 Now let me ask you, sweetie... 让我来问问你亲爱的
56:07 ...what does your baby's daddy think about you dating my Michael? 你孩子的爸爸对你跟我儿子的事 有何意见啊
56:13 Or is he incarcerated? 他是坐牢呢吧
56:15 You know, how you people run around, I don't know. 你懂得你们这些人怎么过日子 我不太清楚
56:19 Incarcerated? No, why would you-- 坐牢 不 你怎么会这么想
56:20 Candace, would you like a tour of the house? 卡丹 你想参观下我的房子吗?
56:22 Yeah, why don't we give Tandace a tour of the house? 是啊 为什么不带塔丹参观参观呢
56:25 Candace. It is Candace. Tan-- Tandace? -卡丹 是卡丹 -卡…
56:28 It's-- Candace, with a-- 是卡丹 卡开头
56:32 I can tell she really likes you. 我保证 她真的很喜欢你的
56:34 -Come on, let's take a tour. -Now come on, let's take a look. -来啊 来参观啊 -来吧 四处看看
56:36 -Just come on. -Doesn't it tell a story? 来啊 这些照片像不像在讲述一个故事
56:39 I've tried to capture all the special moments with me and my baby boy. 我想把所有和我儿一起经历的 美妙时刻都记录下来
56:43 I bet you don't remember when I got you that bracelet, though. 我打赌你不记得 我什么时候送你的手链
56:45 Outside of Paris, this little shop with the cute little jewelry-- 在巴黎的时候 有个卖小珠宝的小商店
56:50 Remember that look on your face when you opened up that box? 有个卖小珠宝的小商店 记得打开盒子时候的表情么
56:52 Yeah, I know, I know. 是啊 我记得 我记得
56:53 I thought we were in Milan. 我以为我们在米兰
56:55 No, we'd come from that restaurant-- 不对 我们刚从餐厅出来
56:56 Oh, baby, you're in my room. It's where all the magic happens, girl. 哦 亲爱的 这就是我的房间 这就是奇迹所在 妞
57:00 -Wow. -What do you think? -哇 -怎么样?
57:02 It's like a time capsule. 就像个时光胶囊
57:03 Oh, I keep everything the same for him, for when he sleeps over. 哦 我保留着每一个物件 他要留宿的
57:07 You sleep over? 你在这睡?
57:09 Just on Sunday nights, baby. It's nothing. 只是周日而已 亲爱的 没什么
57:10 And Sunday nights have always been reserved for his mother. 周日的夜晚一直都保留给他母亲的
57:15 And they always will be. 而且永远都会是
57:18 I make his favorite food, and then we play rummy. 我做他最爱的菜 然后玩卡牌游戏
57:21 Mom is the best rummy player right here. 我妈玩卡牌游戏最棒了
57:28 Come on. 来嘛
57:29 I'm not gonna do it, not in front of Candace. 人家不要啦 不要当着卡丹的面啦
57:31 Well, let me get your laundry. 好吧 我给你洗衣服吧
57:33 Laundry? 洗衣服?
57:34 Let me help you with that, Mom. I need some more socks, Mom. 我来帮你 妈 我要买几双新袜子 妈
57:37 They stink! 你的袜子臭死了
57:39 But you know, I don't mind the stinking. I just gotta scrub them a little more. 不过不要紧 我不介意 多洗几遍就好
57:43 Scrubba-dub-dub. Baby Michael in the tub! 我爱洗澡 皮肤好好
57:49 MAMA'S BOYS (妈咪宝贝型)
57:50 excessively attached to their mothers (太粘他们的妈妈)
57:52 he doesn't want to grow up (他不想长大)
57:53 they just can't compete (他们只是不能竞争)
57:57 Shit. 去死吧
57:59 For Zeke, the cookie crumbled on Thursday. 对于齐克开始于周四
58:01 So the night is young. What do you wanna do? 呃 时间还早 你想干吗
58:05 Well, it is our fifth date, right? 那个 这是我们第五次约会 对吧
58:10 It is? I don't know, I lost count. 是么 不记得 没有数
58:13 Did you really? 你不是吧
58:17 So nightcap? 所以 进来喝杯睡前酒
58:22 Okay. 好吧
58:25 Yeah.
58:26 So it's kind of small, but I really got it for the French windows... 家里有点小 但为了法式窗就凑活了
58:32 ...and because it's close to work. 这里离公司也近
58:35 -So-- -Stunning. 很… 美
58:40 Yeah, maybe we should get more comfortable. 是 也许我们要更舒服一点
58:44 Yeah. 好的
58:45 -Yeah. -Yeah. -好的 -好的
58:48 I'm gonna put on some music. 我来放音乐吧
58:51 Or you know what? Better yet, maybe you should go ahead and choose. 不然 还好没选 还是你来选吧
58:56 Cool. 好啊
58:58 That vinyl? 黑胶的
59:00 Yeah, I'm a bit of a purist. 是 我喜欢纯粹的
59:04 -I'll be right back. -Okay. -我去去就来 -好的
59:06 Don't leave. I mean-- 别走 我是说
59:09 Don't leave. 不要离开
59:10 -I won't leave. -Okay. All right. -我不走 -好 很好
59:17 Wow. You really are a purist. 哇 也太纯粹了吧
59:21 How the hell did you get this on vinyl? 这一张也有黑胶
59:24 No. 别搞笑了
59:49 So how do you take your coffee? 那个 你要咖啡么
59:52 See, Zeke found out the hard way that sometimes, a nightcap means just that. 看吧 齐克这才发觉自己想太多了 有时候睡前饮的意思就是
59:56 A nightcap. 一杯咖啡而已
59:57 Three shots of Jack. 要加三杯苹果白兰地
59:59 You're so silly. 傻小子
1:00:08 Yo!
1:00:10 Oh, Ced, what you run outta this time? I ain't had no milk. -哦 赛德这次又来借什么 -牛奶没了
1:00:13 Hey, let me ask you a serious question. You think I look like Idris Elba? 嘿 我很严肃地问你 我长得像伊德里斯厄尔巴么
1:00:17 Because the stripper down at the new club Sweaty Crack told me that last night... 昨晚那个新开夜店的 脱衣舞娘说我像
1:00:20 ...but I had a lot of ones in my hand... 不过爷手里有钱
1:00:21 ...so I don't know if she was trying to play me or not. 才不确定她是不是真心的
1:00:23 Don't even answer. Don't worry about it. 别回答 当我没说
1:00:24 Because it made me feel good when she said it. 她这么说 爷心里爽
1:00:26 All right, looks like somebody got invited in. How'd it go? 好吧 看起来哥们儿被留宿了啊 怎么样
1:00:29 We had coffee. 我们喝了咖啡
1:00:30 -And? -Mint Milano Cookies. -然后? -薄荷米兰饼干
1:00:32 And? 然后?
1:00:34 And we talked and we talked about our childhoods and art and music... 聊天然后聊天 从美好童年到诗词歌赋
1:00:38 ...and Plato's Allegory of the Cave. What is Plato's Allegory of the Cave? 还有柏拉图的洞穴寓言 柏拉图的洞穴到底寓言了什么?
1:00:41 It's actually very profound. 那寓言很深刻的其实
1:00:43 On par with Bishop Don Magic Juan's book... 深刻程度堪比唐魔术大主教
1:00:45 ...of pimp knowledge and street wisdom, which is a very good read. 还有约翰的著作和街头智慧 其实很值得品读的
1:00:47 Five dates and all I get is a cup of coffee. What is wrong with her? 五次约会就换来一杯咖啡 她有毛病啊?
1:00:50 Ain't nothing wrong with her. What's wrong with you? 她没毛病 有毛病的是你
1:00:52 Looks like the old Negro Gigolo is losing his flow. 我们的黑人舞男的魅力消失了呢
1:00:55 I'm in a relationship without sex... 我们的关系里只有情没有性
1:00:57 ...when all I'm really trying to get is sex without a relationship. 而我想要的是只有性没有情
1:01:00 So when you gonna see her again? 所以 你什么时候再见她
1:01:01 Saturday night, nigga. Mind your business. 周六晚上 黑鬼 管好你自己的事
1:01:04 Nice job. 干得好啊
1:01:05 Hey, Zeke, when you go upstairs, you gonna look in the toilet... 嘿 齐克 你上楼的时候 看看马桶 得有人管管它 我不太确定
1:01:09 ...it's gonna appear to be stopped up, I don't know for sure. 看看马桶 得有人管管它 我不太确定
1:01:12 I just didn't know where the plunger was... 我忘了马桶塞在哪儿呃
1:01:13 ...so don't be caught off guard when you see it. 看的时候别被吓尿了
1:01:15 There's a lot. 尿漫金山了
1:01:17 -So we stayed up all night... -Okay. -我们整晚没睡 -好
1:01:18 ...and we talked about everything. 谈天说地
1:01:21 Did you keep the cookie in the cookie jar? 没被占便宜吧?
1:01:23 -But of course. -Nice. -当然没有 -很好
1:01:25 I'm not gonna lie, though, and say that it was easy. 我不打算骗你 说这没什么
1:01:27 I don't know, when he kissed me, it was like sex. 不过当他吻我的时候 感觉就像做爱一样
1:01:31 So yeah, thank you for your advice on the undies. 所以 对了 多谢你关于内衣的建议
1:01:34 Which ones did you wear? 你穿的哪一个 外婆式样的
1:01:35 -The granny ones. -The grandma drawers? 你穿的哪一个 外婆式样的 那种的
1:01:38 I told you the ugly panty trick would work. 早说了恶心的内衣会奏效的
1:01:40 -You wasn't trying to listen now. -And it worked. -听我说嘛 -它奏效了
1:01:42 Now that it's not just a theory, do you really think you can last 90 days? 既然这不只是理论而已 你真相信你能坚持90天
1:01:46 Monique! 莫妮卡
1:01:48 -It's Mya! -Call me! 我叫玛雅 记得打给我哦
1:01:51 It's Mya, asshole! 我叫玛雅 混蛋
1:01:57 Yeah. Yeah, I think I can definitely do 74 more days. 是 我相信我还能再坚持74天
1:02:01 Okay, Monique. 好的 莫妮卡
1:02:03 -I'm canceling the date. -Why? -我要取消约会 -为什么
1:02:05 He's a part-time waiter. 他是个兼职服务生
1:02:07 May I remind you, Miss Thing, that we were both waitresses... 容我提醒你 大人物小姐我们以前在橄榄园
1:02:11 ...for two years at Olive Garden? 也做了两年的服务生呢
1:02:14 Candace, we were in college. 卡丹 那是大学了
1:02:16 I'm talking about a grown-ass man... 我说的是一个成熟的男人
1:02:18 ...who admitted that he was valet-parking the Benz he chased me down in. 他向我承认追我用的奔驰 是他代客停车的
1:02:22 It's kind of romantic. 很浪漫啊
1:02:23 It's kind of pathetic. 很可悲啊
1:02:25 I thought you didn't care about how much he made. 我以为你不介意他的工资多少呢
1:02:26 I thought you believed in his dreams. 我以为你相信他的梦想呢
1:02:28 -But not his pipe dreams. Come on! -Okay, fine. -他这不叫梦想 叫异想天开 -好吧 你说了算
1:02:31 Dump the first guy who puts you before anything else... 头一遭有个男人事事以你为先
1:02:33 ...because he doesn't make six figures. 而你要甩了 他就因为他年薪不到六位数
1:02:35 Please, he doesn't even make four. 拜托 他连四位数都到不了
1:02:37 And I can't invest that kind of time in something... 我不能把时间浪费在
1:02:39 ...that I know won't yield tangible dividends. 没法产生切实回报的东西上
1:02:42 Would you listen to yourself? 你听听你自己说的话
1:02:43 Dominic is a person, Lauren, not a stock portfolio. 多米尼克是人 劳伦不是证券投资组合
1:02:46 Like Steve Harvey says, there's no such thing as the perfect man. 正如史蒂夫哈维说的 世上没有完美的男人
1:02:50 You have to compromise on something. What do you have to lose? 你得学会妥协 你又会有什么损失呢?
1:02:54 My youth. 我的青春
1:02:55 So wait. She just canceled on you? 等等 她就这么把你甩了?
1:02:57 She was about to. Then she got interrupted by her boss. 她是那么打算的 可被她老板打断了
1:02:59 -It's messed up. -You know what? -真糟糕 -你猜怎么着?
1:03:01 Who needs her whole fancy presentation and her board of directors? 谁需要她那些装模作样的演讲 和她的董事会啊?
1:03:05 I make an honest living and I pay my taxes. Most of the time. 我脚踏实地挣钱 依法交税 大多时候如此
1:03:09 Let me tell you something, Dom. I agree with you. 让我告诉你 多米 我同意你说的
1:03:10 I'm an American too, and I agree with your plight, brother. 我也是个美国佬 我理解你的处境 兄弟
1:03:14 Yeah, we got your back. -我也同意 -没错 我们挺你
1:03:15 -What's good with you, Mike? -What up? -你好啊 迈克尔 -嗨
1:03:17 So how did it go between Candace and your mom? 那么 卡丹和你妈妈相处得怎样
1:03:19 It was-- 她们
1:03:20 I'm slowing things down with Michael. 我要和迈克尔慢点来
1:03:21 -Why? -He already has a woman in his life. -为什么 -他已经有一个女人了
1:03:25 Oh, that son of a bitch. Who is it? 哦 这狗娘养的 是谁?
1:03:26 -His mama. -What? -他妈 -什么 恶心
1:03:32 My mom thinks she's nice. 我妈妈觉得她挺好
1:03:34 Yeah, right. No woman has ever been good enough for your mom. 是啊 才怪 你妈妈哪个女人都看不上
1:03:37 You think the first one she gonna root for is the baby mama? 你觉得她第一个满意的 会是个单亲妈妈
1:03:40 -Good luck with that. -Listen to this. -自求多福吧 -听听这个
1:03:42 "Could we reschedule beach day? 我们能换一天去海滩吗
1:03:44 I promised to take my mom to choir practice." 我答应要带我妈妈去唱诗班练习
1:03:47 I can't do that to myself again, and I won't do that to Duke. 我不能再这样对自己 我更不愿这样对杜克
1:03:50 We both deserve a man who's all in. 我们都值得一个一心顾家的男人
1:03:52 Well, then set your standards. 那就定下你的标准啊
1:03:54 Oh, my God, I can't believe I'm quoting anything from that silly little book. 哦 我的天 我真不敢相信 我竟然在引用那本小破书上的话
1:03:57 You tell Michael that you don't want to come in between him and his mother... 你得告诉迈克尔 你不想夹在他和他妈妈之间
1:04:01 ...and that if he wants to continue dating you... 如果他还想继续和你约会
1:04:03 ...then you must be a priority in his life. 他就必须把你放在首位
1:04:05 She's had him his whole life. I can't compete with that. 她都和他在一起一辈子了 我竞争不过的
1:04:08 Well, then dump the first man you've met in three years... 那就把你三年来 遇到的第一个男人甩了
1:04:10 ...that genuinely cares about you and Duke. 别提他还真正关心你和杜克 等等 世上没有完美的男人 对吧
1:04:13 Wait a minute, there's no such thing as a perfect man, right? 等等 世上没有完美的男人 对吧
1:04:16 What do you have to lose? 你又会有什么损失呢
1:04:17 Isn't that what you've been preaching to me all night? 这不是你整晚都在教导我的吗?
1:04:19 Okay. 好吧
1:04:22 I will if you will. 你干我就干
1:04:24 It was the darkest hour. 这简直就是黑暗一小时
1:04:25 The guys were under a full-scale attack. 男人们四面楚歌
1:04:28 But everything changed on D-Day. 但他们绝地反击的日子终于到了
1:04:32 THE A$$ FACTORY (翘臀工厂)
1:04:41 Okay, tell me something. How does it feel to officially be a free man? 好吧 告诉我 正式解脱的感觉怎么样
1:04:45 Great. Okay, listen... 棒极了 -好吧 听着 我可以做任何事 -很好
1:04:47 -...I can do whatever I want... -Okay. -好吧 听着 我可以做任何事 -很好
1:04:48 -...whenever I want, with whoever I want. -Okay. -在任何时间和任何人 -非常好
1:04:51 I'm free from all the "tie-ranny"-- 我再也不用服从她的宝政
1:04:53 -It's "tyranny". -Will you shut up, Bennett? -是暴政 -你能闭嘴么 版纳德?
1:04:54 -Let him finish what he's saying! -I just want you to have proper grammar. -让他说完 -我只是想让你使用正确的语法
1:04:57 All right! I'm free from all the tyranny and oppression. 好吧 我再也不用理会那些苛求和压制
1:04:59 And nagging from all women for good. You hear me? 和女人的唠叨了 你明白吗?
1:05:02 Matter of fact, only woman I want to talk to tonight... 事实上 我今晚唯一会理的女人
1:05:05 ...is dancing butt-naked down at the Ass Factory. What happened to the Sweaty Crack? -就是翘臀工厂里跳舞的裸女 -那家蒙汗掌柜怎么了
1:05:08 -Got shut down. Health-code violations. -Heard about that. -被查封了 卫生不合格 -我听说了
1:05:11 But here's the thing, I like the Ass Factory better... 不过 我更喜欢翘臀工厂
1:05:14 ...because the girls down there are nasty. But they're my kind of nasty. 因为那儿的女孩很淫荡 但淫得对我胃口
1:05:16 Ced! Ced. 但淫得对我胃口
1:05:17 Don't judge me! I'm going through a divorce, homey. 别批判我 我正离着婚呢 哥们儿
1:05:20 Hey, yo, Lauren confirmed our date tomorrow. 嘿 劳伦敲定了我们明天的约会
1:05:22 I thought you and that Lauren was done. 我还以为你和劳伦完了呢
1:05:23 Why you all in the man's business? 为什么你们老是要掺和我们的事
1:05:25 I thought my man said he was done with Lauren. 我还以为我男人说他和劳伦完了
1:05:27 You are whipped! 你这家伙完了
1:05:28 -He's worse than Mike. -Chill with that "worse than Mike." -他比迈克尔还糟 -什么叫比迈克尔还糟啊
1:05:30 -You wanna hear a good story? -No. -你想听个好故事吗? -不
1:05:31 Ced, tell them about the night you saved it with Gail. 赛德跟他们说说你为了科尔 保留的那个销魂晚
1:05:34 I'll take this goddamn bottle and knock your face off, you bring Gail up again. 我会用这该死的瓶子 砸烂你的脸 要是你再提起科尔的话
1:05:37 I don't wanna talk about Gail! All I want to talk about is titties and ass! 我不想谈到科尔 我只想谈前凸后翘
1:05:41 Yo, it's Candace. Should I take it? 是卡丹 我该接电话吗?
1:05:43 No, man! Here, give me the phone. Bros before hos. 不 老兄 给我手机 -重友轻色 -嘿 什么事 美女
1:05:46 Hello. Candace. -重友轻色 -嘿 什么事 美女
1:05:48 Hey, what's up, girl? 嘿 什么事 美女
1:05:49 -Michael. -I was just thinking about you. -迈克尔 -我正想着你呢
1:05:51 No, hi, I thought I'd get your voicemail. 不 嗨 我还以为我会接通你的语音信箱
1:05:53 No, you got me, baby. 不 你接通的是我 宝贝
1:05:55 Listen, Michael. 听着 迈克尔
1:05:57 We need to talk. 我们得谈谈
1:05:59 Ladies, few words are more menacing than the dreaded four, "We need to talk". 女士们 没什么话 能比上这可怕的五个字 我们得谈谈
1:06:04 Now, that means one of two things, that we did something wrong... 这可能意味着两件事 我们犯错了
1:06:08 ...or you literally want to talk. 或是你真的想谈谈
1:06:13 -She wants to talk. -That's a new one. -她想谈谈 -这是个新招
1:06:15 That's bad, dude. Good! I hope she talk your damn head off. -这可不怎么样 老兄 -好极了 我祝她把你的脑袋谈下来
1:06:18 Is it ever a good sign when a woman wants to talk? 女人想谈话会是什么好兆头吗
1:06:20 No. Not in my house anymore. 不 在我家不是了
1:06:22 Kris used to be fun and chill, and now she's just in my face all the time... 克里斯汀原来很有型的 可现在她一天到晚咄咄逼人
1:06:26 ...nagging, harping, like, "What are your short-term goals? 唠唠叨叨着些 你的短期目标是什么?
1:06:29 "What are your long-term goals? Jeremy, what's your view on relationships?" 你的长期目标是什么 杰里米 你怎么看待感情关系
1:06:33 Like, I'm in the middle of a game of Call of Duty-- 我正玩儿着使命召唤呢
1:06:35 Whoa, whoa, whoa, run that back. What did you just say? 等等 再说一遍 你一开始说什么来着?
1:06:37 What, the long-term goals, short-- 怎么了 长期目标 短期
1:06:38 -Please, don't make me repeat-- -Yes, that's crazy. You know what? -拜托 别让我重复 没错 -这太疯狂了 你猜怎么着?
1:06:40 Candace asked me those exact same questions on our first date. 我们第一次约会时卡丹也问了 我一模一样的问题
1:06:43 Mya asked me the same thing. 玛雅也问了我这个
1:06:45 So did Lauren. 劳伦也是
1:06:46 You know what? You know who asked me that question? 你知道吗 你知道谁问了我那个问题吗?
1:06:49 Not a goddamn soul! Because strippers don't ask me shit! 他妈的没人 因为脱衣舞女什么也不问
1:06:52 Listen to what she said to me the other day. 听听她那天跟我说什么了
1:06:54 She said, "I'm not your sports fish." 她说 我不是你的竞技鱼
1:06:55 What is a sports fish? 什么叫竞技鱼?
1:06:57 A trophy girl. You show her off to your buddies. 一个奖杯一样的女孩 你拿她跟你的朋友们炫耀
1:06:59 What the hell are you talking about, Bennett? 一个奖杯一样的女孩 你拿她跟你的朋友们炫耀 你他妈说什么呢 版纳德?
1:07:01 I was watching Oprah. 看奥普拉看来的
1:07:02 -Why are you watching Oprah? -I like Oprah. -你为什么会看奥普拉 -我挺喜欢奥普拉的
1:07:04 Man, you gotta say "no homo" when you say shit like that at a divorce party. 伙计 我真想跟你说 拒绝基佬 你非得在离婚派对上说这种屁话吗
1:07:06 She had Steve Harvey on the show. 史蒂夫哈维上了她的节目
1:07:08 He wrote some book. It's for women, but it's about men. 他写了本书是给女人写的关于男人
1:07:11 -Family Feud Steve Harvey? -I heard something about that. -家庭矛盾史蒂夫哈维节目的那个? -我听说过这事
1:07:13 He threw us under the bus like that? That's uncouth. I wouldn't do that. 他就这么把我们给卖了 这太没素质了 我肯定不会这么干
1:07:16 I thought Steve Harvey was kind of my nigga, but-- 我一直挺喜欢史蒂夫哈维的
1:07:17 -Me too. -What? -我也是 -什么?
1:07:18 -You too, what? -I didn't say anything. -你也什么? -我什么也没说
1:07:20 -Tell me exactly what he says in the book. -A whole bunch of shit. 快告诉我他书里到底都写了什么? 一堆狗屁
1:07:24 All right, this is why we're ruining my party. Because of that information. 很好 这就是为什么 我们要毁了我的派对 就因为那个信息
1:07:28 I got it online, here we go. I got a review-- 我在网上找到了 来吧 有人回复了
1:07:31 I got to get my hands on that book. 我得找到那本书
1:07:32 No, you're not gonna do it now. 不 现在不行
1:07:33 -You said bros before hos. -One second. 你说了要重友轻色
1:07:36 Exactly! Guess what? Your bro need a ho! 没错! 猜猜怎么着 你朋友我正需要色!
1:07:38 Let me tell you something, I got a pocket full of ones... 让我告诉你吧 我身上全是一美元的票子
1:07:39 ...and I ain't got no goddamn drawers on. 但没有内裤
1:07:41 I didn't wear no drawers tonight. 我今晚可没穿什么内裤
1:07:42 Now y'all supposed to be my wing men. Right now, fly with me! 你们本来都该做我的左膀右臂 就是现在 和我飞吧!
1:07:44 Celebrate, men! Get your-- Fly with me, men! Goddamn it! 庆祝啊 老兄!快把你们的… 和我飞啊 伙计们!该死的!
1:07:49 This ain't good. 这可不好
1:07:50 Yes, hello, we're looking for a book called-- 是的 你好 我们正在找一本书 名字叫
1:07:52 Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. 《像女人一样办事 像男人 一样思考》
1:07:54 Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. Everywhere? Thanks. 《像女人一样办事 像男人 一样思考 》 所有地方吗 谢谢
1:07:58 Said they've been sold out for, like, a week. 那边说书一周前就卖光了
1:08:00 -Good. -Can't be sold out everywhere. -好极了 -不可能到处都卖光了
1:08:01 -They don't even have it on eBay. -It's the power of Oprah. -网上都没有了 -这就是奥普拉的力量
1:08:03 I think I got something. Okay, cool. Where's San Pablo? 我想我找到了 好的 圣巴勃罗在哪儿?
1:08:06 Border of Oregon. 俄列冈州边境
1:08:08 That's not gonna work. 这也不成
1:08:09 -Looks like we tried. -Hello. Right now? -看上去我们已经尽力了 -你好 现在吗?
1:08:11 Tomorrow is another day. We can tackle it then. 明天又是崭新的一天 我们可以到时再解决
1:08:12 -Let's go, men. Strip club time! -Y'all take me to my mama house? -我们走 伙计们 脱衣舞时间! -你们能送我去我妈妈家吗?
1:08:14 Driver, can we go to my house? 司机 我们能不能去我家?
1:08:16 I thought you said you was gonna cancel that with your mama. 我还以为你跟你妈妈的约定取消了
1:08:17 Have you ever tried canceling on my mom, Ced? 你有试过跟我妈取消约定吗 赛德?
1:08:19 I'm gonna say this since don't nobody else wanna say it, Michael. 既然其他人不说我就说了 迈克尔
1:08:23 You ever try heterosexuality? 你试过异性恋吗?
1:08:31 Mom! 妈!
1:08:35 Got your favorite. 做了你最爱吃的
1:08:37 -Smelling good too. -Look at that, huh? -闻着也不错 -看看这个
1:08:38 Let me get some chicken. Let me get some chicken! 让我尝口鸡肉 让我尝口鸡肉!
1:08:41 Stop. And the onions, you know I love the sautéed onions, and the cornbread. 停下 还有洋葱 你知道的 我喜欢煎洋葱 还有玉米面包
1:08:44 I know. I'm gonna get you a plate, but clear all this off, first. 我知道 我会给你盛一盘 但你得先把这儿清理干净
1:08:47 All right, all right. And make sure that sweet potato pie-- 好吧 别忘了甘薯派
1:08:52 I will, little boy, you just clear the counter. 我不会忘的 小崽子 你把流理台清理干净就好
1:08:54 Mom, what is this? 妈妈 这是什么?
1:08:56 That's that book by that big-head boy that's on that Family Feud thing. 是一本书作者是 演那个家庭矛盾的大头男孩
1:09:00 Act Like Something, Think Like Something Else. 像什么玩意儿一样办事 像另一种玩意儿一样思考
1:09:02 It's the new read for my book club. 是我读书俱乐部的新书
1:09:03 Every war has its turning point. 每场战争都有它的转折点
1:09:05 In the Civil War, it was the Battle of Gettysburg. 南北战争的转折点是葛底斯堡战役
1:09:10 World War II, it was the Invasion of Normandy. 第二次世界大战的转折点 是诺曼底登陆
1:09:14 The definitive turning point in this war was that night at Loretta's house. 而这场战争决定性的转折点 洛雷塔是在家的那一晚
1:09:18 It was like finding the Holy Grail. 那感觉就像找到了耶稣的圣杯
1:09:19 Jeremy. Tell them to turn the bus around. 杰里米 让他们把汽车调头
1:09:22 The power had just shifted in our favor. But we didn't know that yet. 命运的天平终于倾向了我们这边 但那时我们还不知道这一点
1:09:25 "Why Men Do What They Do." Look at this, guys. 男人为什么如此行事 看看这个伙计
1:09:27 Steve Harvey is a traitor. 史蒂夫 哈维是个叛徒
1:09:29 Look, "Mama's Boys." Chapter 7. That's you. 看啊 恋母情结第7章 说你呢
1:09:32 I'm not a Mama's Boy. 我才不恋母
1:09:33 Jer, you don't think I'm a Mama's Boy, do you? 你不觉得我恋母吧
1:09:34 -Nah. -Listen to this. -不觉得啊 -听听这个
1:09:36 "Men respect standards, get some." I prefer my women not to have standards. 男人尊重有标准的女人所以订些标准 我更希望我的女人没有标准
1:09:39 In fact, if I've got to choose, I'm gonna choose the woman who has no standards. 事实上 如果我可以选 我会选完全没有标准的女人
1:09:42 Hold up. "Until a man achieves his goals, or is on the road to... 等等 除非男人达到了他的目标 或是找到了达到目标的路
1:09:45 ...you will never be number one in his life." 否则你永远也不可能成为 他生活中的第一位
1:09:47 See, that's not even true. 这一点儿也不准
1:09:48 I've achieved absolutely nothing and I still put my women first. 我什么目标也没达到 可还是会把我的女人放在首位
1:09:51 -This is sick. -It's brainwashing, I'm telling you. 这真恶心 这是洗脑 我告诉你
1:09:53 She's trying to push me towards my dreams... 她试图把我推向我的梦想
1:09:55 ...and help me accomplish my goals. 帮我实现目标
1:09:57 Why would she do this? 她为什么要这么做?
1:09:58 Shit, at least you're getting some. 该死 至少你还能没事来一发
1:10:00 Ninety days, that's not a probation, that's a death sentence. 90天 这可不是试用期 这是判死刑
1:10:03 Hell, yeah, I want to taste your yams. 当然了 我很想尝尝你的甘薯
1:10:05 -Hey, Mike, how old is your mom? -What? -嘿 迈克尔 你妈妈多大了? -什么?
1:10:08 No, not like that. No, it is. It is like that. How old is she? 不 你想歪了 好吧 你没想歪 她多大了?
1:10:11 I come in the house, she's like, "You want to eat?" I said, "Eat what?" 我进屋时 她问“你想吃点什么吗” 我说“吃什么”
1:10:14 Yo, first of all, put my plate down and stop hitting on my mom, man. 嘿 首先 把我的 盘子放下 还有别再勾引我妈了 兄弟
1:10:17 Don't get mad at me! I don't even wanna be here. 别生气嘛! 我一点儿也不想来这儿
1:10:18 Y'all the ones that wanna be here, I want to go to the strip club! 是你们要来的 我想去脱衣舞俱乐部!
1:10:21 Man, wrap this up. I got a bunch of ones, and somebody gonna get them. 哥们儿 快点搞定 我还有一堆一美元呢 得把它们用出去
1:10:24 Ms. Loretta! I'm ready for the rest of the tour. 洛雷塔太太!我准备好继续参观了
1:10:30 You guys are so screwed. And honestly, there's nothing you can do about it. 你们这些家伙要完蛋了 而且说实话 你们也只能坐以待毙
1:10:34 Maybe we can. 也许不用呢
1:10:35 They got our playbook, man. They know all of our maneuvers. 她们拿到了我们的战略计划 知道我们所有的行动
1:10:38 Yeah, but they don't know that we know that they know our maneuvers. 没错 可是她们不知道 我们知道她们知道我们的行动
1:10:43 You see why I don't hang out with Jeremy by himself? 你知道我为什么不跟杰里米 单独出去了吧?
1:10:44 I don't ever know what he's talking about. 我从来搞不明白他在说什么
1:10:46 Guys! It's like the Patriots, when Bill Belichick stole the Jets' plays. 兄弟们 这就像爱国者队的比尔比利克 把喷射队的战术给偷走了一样
1:10:50 -Right, and they got busted. -Yeah, but they won the game. -是啊 然后他们被整得够呛 -没错 可他们最后赢了
1:10:52 And where'd they end up? The Super Bowl. 最后他们去了哪儿 超级碗
1:10:55 I wish I knew what you was talking about. 我真希望知道你在说什么
1:10:57 We use Steve Harvey's words against them. 我们用史蒂夫哈维的话 反过来对付她们
1:10:59 We pretend to give them what they want so we get what we want. 我们假装给她们想要的 以此得到我们想要的
1:11:02 We lie to them. 我们跟她们撒谎
1:11:04 Exactly. This is war, gentlemen. There are no rules. 没错 这是战争 先生们 战争没有规则
1:11:08 Like the great Khan once said, not Genghis... 可汗大帝曾经说过 不是成吉思汗
1:11:11 ...I'm talking about the Latin guy from Star Trek II: 我是说星际迷航二里的那个拉丁人
1:11:13 "Revenge is a dish best served cold." 君子报仇十年不晚
1:11:16 Michael, I need to get something off my chest. 迈克尔 我得跟你说件事
1:11:18 You know what? Before you get something off your chest... 你知道吗 你说之前
1:11:21 ...I gotta get something off my chest. 我也得跟你说件事
1:11:22 You know I can be a bit of a Mama's Boy? 你知道我有的时候有点恋母?
1:11:25 I think it really all started when my dad died. 我猜这是在我爸爸去世后开始的
1:11:29 It was a rough time for us, you know? 那对我们来说是段艰难的日子 你知道吗?
1:11:31 And my mom just started relying on me for so many things. Too many things. 而我妈妈就开始依赖我做很多事 太多事了
1:11:37 You know, I had to be the man of the house at a really young age... 你知道 我年纪小小就要做一家之主
1:11:41 ...and I guess maybe that's why we're so close. Michael. -我猜这就是我们如此亲密的原因 -迈克尔
1:11:44 And I guess, I guess what I'm trying to say is this. 我猜 我猜我想要说的是…
1:11:48 I want you to be the number-one woman in my life. 我想要你成为我生命中第一位的女人
1:11:51 It was like taking a test you already had the answers to. 这就好像参加考试 而你已经知道答案
1:11:53 You're my priority, Candace. All right? 我会把你放在首位 卡丹 -好吗? -好
1:11:57 Yeah. -好吗? -好
1:11:58 All right. Now, you said you wanted to talk about something. 很好 你刚刚说你想说些什么
1:12:03 Did I? 我说了吗?
1:12:04 The women had no chance. They were like putty in our hands. 女人们没有任何胜算 她们已成瓮中之鳖
1:12:08 So I just updated my résumé, and sent it off to Neversoft. 我刚刚更新了我的简历 投到了威软公司
1:12:14 Really? You're serious? 真的? 你是认真的吗?
1:12:16 I was intrigued by a job posting I saw in Adweek and I thought: 我看中了广告周刊上的 一个招聘职位 然后我想
1:12:19 "Why not go for it, Jeremy? You have nothing else to lose." 为什么不试试呢 杰里米 你已经没有什么好失去的了
1:12:22 Baby, that's awesome, that's wonderful. I'm so proud of you. 宝贝 这太棒了 真的很棒 我真为你自豪
1:12:26 -Oh, my God. -Don't get too excited, okay? -哦我的天 -别兴奋过头 好吗?
1:12:28 It's just a feeler. Probably won't even call me in. 八字还没一撇呢 可能都不会叫我去参加面试
1:12:31 No, you're selling yourself short. 不 你低估自己了
1:12:32 Jeremy, you were the best in your class at Parsons, you're a brilliant designer. 杰里米 你在帕金斯设计学院时是 你们班最好的学生 你是个好设计师
1:12:36 No. You're a brilliant artist. They'd be lucky to have you. 不 你是个很棒的艺术家 能有你是他们的荣幸
1:12:39 I'm lucky to have you. 也是我的荣幸
1:12:42 You are? 真的吗?
1:12:45 You know what I was just thinking? What? -你知道我刚刚在想什么吗? -什么?
1:12:48 -Nobody's had sex on this couch yet. -What? -还没有人在这张沙发上做过呢 -什么?
1:12:51 -No, it's a virgin couch. -Really? -不 这沙发还是个处子 -真的?
1:12:54 What do you think we should do about that? 你觉得我们该怎么办?
1:12:55 There's about 10 things I think we can do about that. 我脑海里已经有十种解决办法了
1:12:57 Only 10? You'll be crying out like a bitch after three. -才十种? -试过三种之后你就该哭了
1:13:00 Now I'm scared. 现在我开始害怕了
1:13:02 I love this couch. 我爱这张沙发
1:13:03 After careful study, Dominic realized there was only one man... 在仔细研究之后多米尼克 意识到只有一种男人
1:13:07 ...who could impress the Alpha Female. 能令女强人刮目相看
1:13:08 "The Guy With Potential." Zeke. -潜力股 齐克 -什么?
1:13:10 -What? -I have to show her I'm a man with a plan. 我得向她证明我是一个有计划的男人
1:13:12 -Well, just make some shit up, dude. -No. -那就瞎编呗 兄弟 -不
1:13:14 -Remember that restaurant idea I had? -Yeah. -还记得我开餐馆的那个主意吗? -记得
1:13:16 I need you to help me with a business plan. 我需要你帮我整个商业计划出来
1:13:18 Cook for her. Dummy. 给她下厨啊 傻子
1:13:19 I already did. Breakfast. 我已经下过了 早饭
1:13:22 I ain't talking about no breakfast, boy! Something fancy, Dom. 我说的可不是早饭老兄 高级一点儿的 多米
1:13:26 Like, like one of them dishes with an apostrophe in it. 像那些名字上带一撇儿的菜
1:13:29 Is that your robe? 那是你的睡袍吗?
1:13:31 Yeah. Man, you here again? 是啊 你怎么又在啊?
1:13:33 Yes! Ass Factory don't open up till 10:00, so I got time to waste. 是啊! 翘臀工厂10点才开门 所以我有得是时间
1:13:37 -Bitch, move in already. -What'd you say? -贱人 搬进来算了 -你说什么?
1:13:41 I'm sorry if I want to be around my friends when I'm going through a divorce. 我很抱歉 我想在离婚期间 和我的朋友多待一会儿
1:13:43 What was I thinking? 我这是想什么呢?
1:13:45 You're something else, boy. 真仗义啊 兄弟
1:13:46 Look, Gail used to love it when I would cook for her. It turned her on. 你看 科尔曾经很喜欢 我给她下厨 这让她性致盎然
1:13:49 You can do all types of things in the kitchen. 你可以在厨房里做很多事
1:13:51 We had a little food thing that we would do. 我们会用食物做道具
1:13:53 I would go and get some chocolate-covered strawberries, right? 我会去拿些抹过巧克力酱的草莓
1:13:55 Then I would come downstairs, I have a G-string on. 然后我会穿着丁字裤下楼
1:13:59 You know what I'm talking about. She used to love it. 你懂的 她过去可喜欢了
1:14:01 So the game was "Balance the Berry." 游戏的名字叫“不倒翁小草莓”
1:14:05 I would put it on the-- 我会把它放在…
1:14:08 But the way it's-- 但那种方式…
1:14:10 The berry ain't gonna stay there for long. The berry wouldn't stay on, so-- 草莓在那儿待不了多久 草莓会倒下来 所以
1:14:15 The point that I'm making is this, Dom. 我想说的是 多米
1:14:18 Food is your art. Stick with what you know. 你把食物当艺术 好好利用你的知识
1:14:24 It's good milk, Zeke. 牛奶不错 齐克
1:14:27 He's right. 他说得没错
1:14:30 It's on. 开战吧
1:14:31 -It's over. -Wait, what happened? -结束了 -等等 发生什么了?
1:14:32 Dominic's car broke down. 多米的车坏了
1:14:34 I have to go pick him up? -我还得去接他 -所以呢?
1:14:36 So? Calm down. Do you know how many times... 冷静下来 你知道有多少次
1:14:38 ...I had to pick you up when your Jag broke down? 你的捷豹坏掉的时候我得去接你吗?
1:14:40 Save it, Candace. 省省吧 卡丹
1:14:41 The man is a loser. 那男人就是个失败者
1:14:42 And I'm the fool who slept with him. On the first night. 而我就是那个 第一晚就跟他睡了的蠢蛋
1:14:45 Which is a memory he will have to cherish for the rest of his life... 不过那是一段他得 永远珍惜的美好回忆
1:14:49 ...because it is never happening again. Never. 因为这再也不会发生了 再也不会
1:14:57 Hey, beautiful. 嘿 美人儿
1:15:00 Dominic. 多米
1:15:04 You look beautiful. 你看上去很美
1:15:06 Yeah, you've mentioned that. 是啊 你已经说过一遍了
1:15:09 -Would you like a glass of wine? -Actually, I came over here-- -你要来杯红酒吗? -事实上 我来这儿是想
1:15:12 It's a Chateau Montelena, 2006. 是2006年的蒙特雷纳
1:15:18 That won first place in the Judgment of Paris back in '76. 1976年得过巴黎品酒会的头等奖
1:15:22 Actually, it was a '73 Chardonnay that won... 事实上 赢的是1973年的霞多丽
1:15:25 ...but I've heard this one is better. 但我听说这支更好
1:15:28 It was a gift. 这是个礼物
1:15:30 But I wanted to save it for a special occasion. 但我想把它留到特别的时刻再喝
1:15:34 Well, thank you. 好吧 谢谢
1:15:39 So... 那么
1:15:42 ...to tonight. 敬今晚
1:15:44 Yeah.
1:15:50 Oh, my God. 哦 我的天
1:15:51 This is good. 这真不错
1:15:54 Yeah, there's more. 是啊 还有别的呢
1:16:11 You did all this for me? 这些全都是你为了我做的?
1:16:27 Good evening, madam. 晚上好 女士
1:16:29 Wild-- 野生
1:16:31 -Goddamn. -Man-- -该死 -伙计
1:16:32 I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. 抱歉 我很抱歉
1:16:35 Wild Mushroom en "Croût"? 野生蘑菇树皮派?
1:16:38 "Croûte." 酥皮派
1:16:39 Croûte? 酥皮派?
1:16:42 Thank you. 谢谢
1:16:43 -Enjoy your dinner. -Thanks. -用餐愉快 -谢谢
1:16:51 I really wanted to change your association of me with hors d'oeuvres. 我真的很想用开胃菜 改善我们的关系
1:16:57 So, what do you think? 那么 你觉得怎么样?
1:16:59 Amazing. 棒极了
1:17:02 So are you. 你也是
1:17:05 Thank you. 谢谢
1:17:09 And look at the stars. 看看星星
1:17:11 Make a wish. 许个愿吧
1:17:17 Okay. 好啊
1:17:24 Aren't you gonna make one? 你自己怎么不许一个
1:17:29 No need. 没这必要
1:17:46 And on that same night, Zeke was on an entirely different kind of mission. 而就在同一晚 齐克则踏上了截然不同的一段征程
1:17:49 Dude, don't tell me what I said. I know what I said. 兄弟你别提醒我自己说了什么 我清楚自己说了什么
1:17:51 -But I'm telling you, I'm done with her. -What? -然后我现在告诉你 我受够她了 -什么
1:17:53 I'm not competing with this 90-Day Rule. 我才不要和什么90天的规矩抗衡呢
1:17:55 -You have the ammo. -Babe, I'm going upstairs. 可你现在是有装备的啦 宝贝 我要上楼了
1:18:01 All right, listen. 好吧 听着
1:18:02 Use "how men show their love" against her to get the cookie. 你就用 "男人是如何示爱" 那办法反将一军然后就能吃到甜心
1:18:07 You profess. Call her your girlfriend. 你跟她表白 称呼她是自己的女朋友
1:18:09 Bro, stop it. Do you have any idea what I've been through? 兄弟停 我都遭了什么罪 你完全不知道吧?
1:18:11 I'm sick of picking up checks and opening doors... 我已经受够了一定要主动买单啊 要为她开门啊
1:18:14 ...and talking about our feelings and our childhoods. 然后还一直聊我们的感情还有童年
1:18:16 It's like the 1950s, man! I just want to hit. 这简直就像是回到1950年代 哥只想直达目的
1:18:18 And if she thinks I'm gonna wait 71 more days just to get the cookie... 要是她真以为我准备 再等上个71天才吃她的甜心饼干
1:18:21 -...she gonna be waiting by herself. -You kept count? -那她就自己一个人慢慢等吧 -你还真的在算天数
1:18:23 I'm not counting, but you're gonna know the amount of day-- 我没在数 就是你总得知道这多久的时间吧
1:18:26 You really like her. 你真喜欢上她了
1:18:27 No, bro, trust me on this. I am done, okay? 才不是 兄弟你信我这回 我受够她了好吗?
1:18:29 I'm ending it tonight. 我今晚就和她了断
1:18:30 Yeah, have fun on your date. 好啊 祝约会愉快
1:18:32 I bet you I dump her 90-day ass. 我一定会甩了 那个90天规则的傻妞的
1:18:35 Hey. 晚上好
1:18:37 Listen. 听着
1:18:39 Mya, about tonight-- 玛雅 今天晚上
1:18:40 Okay, I have a surprise. You do? -好吧 我有个惊喜要给你 -真的吗?
1:18:43 Yeah, I got us tickets to see John Legend at Nokia Theatre. 是啊 我搞到了约翰传奇 在诺基亚剧院的演唱会票
1:18:48 Okay, that's cool. 好 那…那很好啊
1:18:51 Yeah. 是啊
1:18:52 -Okay. -Okay. So let's go. -好吧 -好 那…我们就出发吧
1:19:01 So I hope you don't get mad at me... 那个…我希望你不要生我的气 不过…我叔叔是个音乐制作人 然后我就把你的唱片给他听了
1:19:05 ...but my uncle is a music producer and I passed him your CD. 不过…我叔叔是个音乐制作人 然后我就把你的唱片给他听了
1:19:08 You took my CD? 是你拿走了我的唱片?
1:19:09 Yes. And the three pieces of gum that were stuck to it. 是啊 上面还粘着三块口香糖呢
1:19:13 Okay, you know what? I was looking for that gum. 你知道么 我之前就在找那些口香糖
1:19:15 You know I'm done with the music industry, right? I love what I do. 你清楚我已经不想在涉足音乐界了啊 我很喜欢现在的工作
1:19:19 Okay, Zeke, he's not trying to sign you, though. 好啦 齐克 反正他又不是 要和你签约什么的
1:19:22 He wants some new songs for some albums that he's working on. 他只是想要给自己的新专辑 找几首新歌
1:19:24 Yeah, well, my album went Plat-none, okay? 是嘛 可我的专辑是一张都没卖出去
1:19:27 I mean, two people heard it and both of them were relatives. 唯一听过的两个人还都是我家里人
1:19:29 Okay, but I was raving about it, and he decided to check it out. 可我就是很喜欢嘛 所以他就决定要听听看了
1:19:34 You should've been my manager. 你当初要是我的经纪人该多好
1:19:38 Zeke! 齐克!
1:19:39 Super Freak Zeke! What up, baby? 超级咖齐克最近好吗 宝贝!
1:19:42 -Man, hey, what's up-- Xavier! -What up, baby. -天啊 你好啊 泽维尔 -还好吗 兄弟
1:19:45 Oh, my goodness. Baby, this is Zeke. This is the guy that taught me the move. 老天啊 宝贝儿 这就是齐克 就是他教了我所有的招式
1:19:48 The Chimichanga! He was the one who taught me. 油煎饼那招就是他教我的
1:19:50 Hey, this is my lady, Crystal. 这是我家那位克里斯特
1:19:51 Hey, what's going on, Crystal? How you doing? 嗨 你好啊 克里斯特 很高兴认识你
1:19:55 Oh, my bad. Xavier, this is-- 泽维尔 对不起 这位是…
1:19:59 Now, ladies, if a man simply introduces you as his friend... 女士们 如果一个男人 将你简单的介绍为他的朋友
1:20:02 ...then please understand, you are nothing more than his friend. 那就务必请理解这点 你也就只是他的朋友
1:20:05 See, if a man has a plan for you in his future, then he's gonna profess it. 要知道 如果一个男人 把你规划到自己的未来里去 那他一定会和你告白的
1:20:09 He's gonna attach a title to it. 他会冠上某种名分
1:20:11 You're gonna be his woman, his lady, his fiancée, or-- 你是他的女人 他的太太 他的未婚妻 或者…
1:20:18 --my girlfriend, Mya. 我女朋友 玛雅
1:20:21 Zeke realized the man could get a hell of a lot further... 齐克发现一次恰到好处的告白 远比六次精心准备的约会
1:20:24 ...with one well-placed profession than with six carefully planned dates. 更能够让他尝到甜头
1:20:37 Oh, my God. 老天啊
1:20:39 I think we should stop. 我觉得我们今晚就此打住吧
1:20:42 I have to get up early. 明天我要早起
1:20:44 So I better go. 所以…我走了
1:20:47 Okay. 好的
1:20:49 Good night! 晚安
1:20:51 Well, I could walk you to-- 我可以陪你走到…
1:20:53 No, I got this. I'm good, good night! 不用了 我自己能行 我很好 晚安啦
1:20:56 The guys may have lost some battles, but they were winning the war. 兄弟们是输了几场小战役 可他们即将赢得最终的胜利
1:20:59 I'm telling you, Gina. It worked. 吉娜告诉你吧 那真的管用了
1:21:01 He's finally stepping up and looking for a better job. 他终于走出去开始找像样的工作了
1:21:04 Family Feud knows what he's talking about? 这个节目主持人还真不是瞎说的吗?
1:21:06 Changing the game. 要改变游戏规则
1:21:07 How does this affect the 90-Day Rule? 90这对你的天规则有什么影响吗?
1:21:10 The 90-Day Rule is what got me to this point. 正是90规则才让我发展 到现在这步的
1:21:12 It's just, I was saying that I'm not opposed to amending it... 只是说我并不反对要有所回馈
1:21:15 ...you know, for good behavior. 作为对他良好表现的嘉奖
1:21:17 Like changing his Facebook status? 像是他更改了自己的 社交状态这种良好表现
1:21:19 Yeah, see, that's good behavior... 对 那的确是一个很好的动作 可…只要不是因为 那最有魔力的三个字
1:21:21 ...but the cookies don't come out of the cookie jar... 可…只要不是因为 那最有魔力的三个字
1:21:23 ...for anything less than the three magic words. 我还是不会让他轻易尝到甜头的
1:21:25 I hope you guys are ready for some fun in the sun. 我希望你们准备好 在阳光下玩点有趣的啦
1:21:28 Oh, yeah, some fun in the sun. 好啊 在阳光下找点乐子
1:21:30 Oh, wait. Baby, should you get that? It's work. 等一下宝贝儿 你要不要接一下 是公事电话吧
1:21:33 Yeah, it's okay. 没事 你可以接啊
1:21:34 No! Why would I answer work calls when I'm with y'all two? 不用 我和你们俩在一起的时候 干吗去接公事电话
1:21:38 -Don't worry about work. -Yeah, no work. -别担心公事了 -是啊 不谈公事
1:21:40 -You okay back there, Duke? -Yeah. -你坐在后面还好吧 杜克 -好得很
1:21:43 All right, now you got your license too? Because you're driving back, right? 好了 你手里也有驾照的吧 因为你是后座驾驶员 知道么?
1:21:51 I'm just joking. 我逗你玩的啦
1:21:53 Such a romantic. 真是浪漫得很啊
1:21:54 Things were almost going too well. 事情进展得几乎有些过于顺利了
1:21:56 The guys had forgotten that they were even at war. 兄弟几个甚至都忘记自己 正身处战局之中了
1:22:03 All right, thanks a lot, everybody. Once again, I'm Danny Vola. 好的 再 一次感谢大家 我是佛拉丹尼
1:22:06 Go up there and sing. Come on, you should go-- 你也上去唱嘛 来嘛 你应该去 不要 我都好几年没唱过歌了 你给我坐好
1:22:08 No. I ain't sang in years, you sit down. 不要 我都好几年没唱过歌了 你给我坐好
1:22:10 Wait, slow down! Okay, Duke! 等等 你慢点儿 很好 杜克
1:22:13 -All right, you got this. -Be careful! 好的 你已经行了 小心啊
1:22:16 I'm about to get you a motorcycle now, the way you're going, baby. 以你现在骑着小车的水准 我都可以给你买一辆直接骑了
1:22:23 Oh, you want some? 你也要来点么?
1:22:43 Sorry that took so long, babe. One of the guys needed a little of my advice. 抱歉宝贝儿 打了那么久的电话 有个兄弟需要我给他出点主意
1:22:48 Where were we? 我们之前进展到哪儿了
1:22:50 Right here. 就到这儿
1:22:51 But then things started to backfire. 可之后 报应就来了
1:22:54 What ever happened with that job at Neversoft? 那份威软的工作 后来怎么样了?
1:22:58 I forgot to tell you, I heard through the grapevine they filled the position. 我忘记告诉你了 我听内部消息说他们已经招到人了
1:23:05 Really? 真的吗?
1:23:07 Yeah. 是吗?
1:23:10 That's weird... 那就是奇怪了
1:23:13 ...because I heard from Sarah's little brother... 我在商务社交网站上听说
1:23:17 -Yeah? -...on LinkedIn. -听说什么? -听莎拉她弟弟说
1:23:19 And he said that the position was still open. 他说那职位还空着
1:23:24 -Really? -Yeah. -真的吗? -是啊
1:23:26 And that he was gonna personally recommend you to his boss. 他还说他可以亲自向他老板推荐你
1:23:29 Except your résumé's not on file. 只不过你的简历根本就不在档案里
1:23:33 What? 什么?
1:23:35 I've been waiting this whole time. 可我一直很想要这份工作啊
1:23:37 You know what? I had to reset the modem the other day. 知道么 改天我得去重设一下路由器了
1:23:41 I bet you the e-mail didn't go through. 我跟你保证一定是邮件没发送成功
1:23:44 Yeah, I'll fix it in the morning. 一定是 我明早就去修
1:23:49 The Internet? 网络故障?
1:23:52 Yeah, it happens all the time. 对啊 这事儿常有的
1:23:58 Kris? 克里斯汀?
1:24:01 The truth was catching up to them. 而她们也逐渐地看清了现实真相
1:24:07 I'll miss you. 我会想你的
1:24:10 That's me, all right. I'll see you. 我的车来了 再见
1:24:11 Okay.
1:25:00 James? 詹姆斯?
1:25:01 -James Merrill? -Lauren Harris. -詹姆斯梅里尔? -劳伦哈里斯
1:25:04 Wow, look at you. 哇 瞧瞧你
1:25:06 Look at you. 瞧瞧啊
1:25:09 You are like a fine wine. You just get better with age, don't you? 你就好似一瓶佳酿 愈陈愈香是吧
1:25:13 And you get smoother. What are you doing in L.A.? 你倒是更加油嘴滑舌了 在洛杉矶干吗呢?
1:25:16 I'm checking out a sublet. Yeah, I was just promoted CEO of Sensala. 来看看一套转租房 哦 我最近刚升职做了杰瑞卡的总裁
1:25:20 -Wow. -Yeah, yeah. I'm relocating to L.A. -很不错嘛 -是啦 我准备重新驻回洛杉矶
1:25:23 -You're kidding. -No. -开玩笑吧 -是真的
1:25:24 Well, I can't imagine Nina ever wanting to leave Chicago. 我绝对没想到妮娜会同意 从芝加哥搬过来
1:25:28 Yeah, well, that's because she's not. 是啊 那是因为她不过来
1:25:31 We're finalizing our divorce. 我们正在办理离婚手续
1:25:33 -Really? -Yeah. -是吗? -对
1:25:35 -I'm sorry. -No, no, it's all right. -真不好意思啊 -不用不用 没事的
1:25:38 -We're friendly. -That's good. -我们是和平分手的 -那挺好
1:25:39 But what about you? I mean, are you engaged? Married? -那你怎么样了? -我是说是已经订婚了还是结婚了?
1:25:43 No. Not married or engaged. 没有 既没订婚也没结婚
1:25:46 Really? Just dating, but nothing serious. -是吗? -只是在交往 还不是很认真的那种
1:25:50 Well then, why don't we go to dinner? -那好 -我们要不什么时候一起吃个晚饭
1:25:52 Sure. 好啊
1:25:53 Let's do it. I mean, let's do dinner. 那我们就做吧 我是说一起吃晚饭
1:25:57 Well, you have to call me. 那你得再打电话约我
1:25:59 -Got the same number? -Same number. -号码没变? -没变
1:26:00 -All right. -Use it. -没问题 -记得要打啊
1:26:02 -Tomorrow night. -Absolutely. -明晚吧 -没问题
1:26:05 -Like the car. -Me too. -我挺喜欢你车的 -我也是
1:26:07 Love the body. 我喜欢这身体线条
1:26:08 On the car. 这车身的线条
1:26:13 -I hate to trouble you-- -Go away! 我非常不想叨扰到你 滚开
1:26:15 I saw this episode last night at Mom's. This joint is hilarious. 昨晚和妈妈一起看了 这集 剧情太逗了
1:26:18 Wait, I thought you got called back into work last night. 等等 我以为你昨晚是在加班
1:26:21 Oh, yeah, last night I got called back into work... 对 昨晚我是去加班了
1:26:24 ...but remember, I told you I had to stop by my mom's... 可你不记得我不是告诉你 我先去顺路我妈妈那儿
1:26:26 ...to drop off the stuff that she had put at my-- I told you that, babe. 给她送点东西 然后她也要给我 我告诉过你的啊宝贝儿
1:26:30 -No, no, I don't think you-- -Give me a kiss. You don't be listening. -没有啊 我不记得你有 -亲一下 你之前都没听我说话
1:26:33 And the lies were starting to add up. 然后 谎言就越圆越多
1:26:35 Listen, my mom's planning a really big family reunion. 听我说 我妈妈在准备一个 盛大的家庭聚会
1:26:38 -I'd love it if you could come. -Whatever you want, baby. -要是你来我会很高兴 -只要你开心就好 宝贝儿
1:26:40 -Really? -Yeah. -真的? -是啊
1:26:41 I mean, the only bad thing is if your mom and grandma are as fine as you... 唯一的坏处就是 你妈妈和你外婆要是和你一样漂亮
1:26:46 ...you might have some competition over there. 那你可就有竞争对手啦
1:26:48 Come here. 过来
1:26:50 Cool! 太酷了
1:26:51 It's at the park in Culver City. 就在卡尔弗城的那个公园里
1:26:53 There's gonna be a trampoline and barbecue. 到时候还会有弹簧床和烧烤呢
1:26:55 These walls have ears. Duke, please go back to bed. 隔墙有耳啊 杜克 快回去睡觉
1:27:01 So it's gonna be the 20th and it's gonna be so great. 时间是20号 那天 一切都会很棒的
1:27:04 We're gonna have these cotton candy machines-- 我们还准备了做棉花糖的机器
1:27:06 -The 20th of this month? -Carousels-- -这个月的20号 -还有旋转木马
1:27:09 Baby, I can't make the 20th. 宝贝儿 这个月20号我来不了
1:27:11 Why? 为什么?
1:27:12 Well, actually, I promised my mom. It's her church anniversary, so I promised-- 因为 我已经答应了我妈去陪她的 那天是她的教堂周年纪念 我就答应…
1:27:16 Really? You gotta be kidding me! 不是吧 你这玩笑开大了吧
1:27:18 Good night, Duke! 晚安了杜克
1:27:20 Baby, I'm gonna see what I can do, all right? 宝贝儿 我会尽力安排看看的 好吗?
1:27:21 -Okay. -I'm gonna make it happen. -好吧 -我一定会想办法来的
1:27:23 Come here, girl, come here. 过来吧小妞儿 过来
1:27:25 Turns out, the only problem in pretending to step up is... 到头看来假装 有所进展的唯一问题就是
1:27:28 ...well, sometimes, you actually have to. 有时候 你必须做出真正的改变
1:27:31 Yo, watch this right here. Hold it, this is about to jump-- 来看这里 等等 马上就会有一个
1:27:40 Okay, what? 好吧 怎么了?
1:27:43 Okay, okay, okay. I wanted to wait until we had proper drinks... 好啦 我原本是想等到我们 能好好喝一杯的时候再说的
1:27:48 ...but I talked to my uncle last night... 我昨晚和我叔叔谈过
1:27:51 ...and he listened to your CD, and he loved it. 他听过你的唱片了 然后他很喜欢
1:27:54 And he's obsessed with number seven. They want to meet with you on Tuesday! 疯狂迷恋第七首曲目 然后他们想在周二和你见面
1:27:58 Congratulations! 恭喜啦
1:27:59 Oh, my God. You did this for me? 我的天啊 这些都是你为我做的
1:28:02 No, you did it. You left it all on the track. 没有 是你自己做到的 你的实力在唱片上不言自明
1:28:07 I love you, girl. 我爱死你了宝贝
1:28:14 Without even meaning to... 齐克在不经意间
1:28:16 ...Zeke done messed around and uttered the three magic words... 居然使出了大绝招说出了 那三个带有魔力的词语
1:28:19 ...that finally opened the cookie jar. 而这让他终于尝到了甜心饼干
1:28:45 But Zeke's victory was short-lived. 可是齐克的胜利是短暂的
1:28:48 MYA (玛雅)
1:28:56 RAN OUT FOR BREAKFAST BE RIGHT BACK (去买早餐 马上回来)
1:29:21 This cannot be good. 糟糕 这可不是什么好事
1:29:26 No, no, no. 别啊
1:29:30 THE NINETY-DAY RULE (90天的规则)
1:29:45 Am I tripping, or was last night the best night of my life? 是我自己太高兴了 还是说昨晚 真的是我一生中最棒的一个夜晚
1:29:49 You got the cookie. 你吃到甜心饼干了
1:29:50 The cookie? I'm the cookie monster. You know what I got us? I got some latte-- 甜心饼干 我很喜欢吃啊 你知道我买了什么嘛 几杯拿铁咖啡
1:29:58 Mya, I can explain that. 玛雅 我可以解释的
1:30:01 You lying-ass sack of shit! 你个谎话精混蛋
1:30:04 I was just using this to defend myself. 我只是用这书在防护自己
1:30:07 -Defending yourself against what? -Against your 90-Day Rule. -为了什么防护自己 -为了抵抗你的90天规则啊
1:30:10 That was created for women to protect themselves from sorry asses like you. 那规则是为了保护女人们 免受像你这样混蛋带来的伤害的
1:30:13 So I'm the villain, and you didn't even have the guts... 所以我才是坏人 而你却连告诉我本人
1:30:15 ...to tell me that I was on a 90-day probation. 其实正处在90天 观察期里的勇气都没有…
1:30:16 -I was gonna tell you. -Were you gonna tell me? -我是打算告诉你的 -你会告诉我吗?
1:30:18 Yes, I was gonna tell you. But then, I thought I might amend it. 会的 我本来是想告诉你的 可后来… 我想也许可以补偿你一下
1:30:25 Because I thought you might actually be the one. 因为我原本以为你也许就是 我的真命天子
1:30:28 So was any of it real? 那这一切有什么是真的么?
1:30:30 Any of it? The wining, the dining? Calling me your girlfriend? 任何的一部分 我们聊天吃饭 你说我是你的女朋友
1:30:34 Or was that all just to get the cookie? 还是说那一切都只是为了把我骗上床
1:30:41 You win, congratulations. 天啊 恭喜你 你赢了
1:30:43 You got it, right? You won. 你成功了好嘛 你赢了
1:30:45 Mya, wait a minute. Mya, it was true. 玛雅等一下 玛雅那都是真的
1:30:47 Zeke, don't touch me! 你不要碰我
1:30:50 God, you're so good. 老天啊 你真的太厉害了
1:30:52 You're so good. 你太厉害了
1:30:54 Because even when I know that you're lying... 即使我知道你在说谎话
1:30:58 ...I still almost believe you. 我还是差点就信了
1:31:00 In The Art of War, Sun Tzu wrote, "All warfare is based on deception." 孙子兵法有云 兵不厌诈
1:31:05 He left out, "Only dumb-asses get caught." 可他老人家忘记说了 只有笨蛋才会被抓
1:31:08 Work (工作)
1:31:10 Baby, your phone! 宝贝儿 有电话找你!
1:31:12 Meanwhile, Candace didn't even need to find the book to get the message. 而与此同时 卡丹甚至不需要 翻阅兵书就知晓了这一真理
1:31:15 Michael Atwater's phone. 您好 这是迈克尔的电话
1:31:17 -Tandace? -Loretta? -卡丹? -洛雷塔?
1:31:19 Listen, I'm calling to tell Michael that I don't need him to take me to church. 听着 我就是打来告诉迈克尔 我不用他陪我去教堂了
1:31:24 Deacon Johnson will be driving me to church. 执事约翰逊可以载我去
1:31:27 Let me talk to him. Is he free? 让我和他说吧 他现在有空吗?
1:31:30 He will be. 他马上就有空了
1:31:32 Here we go! Oh, slam dunk! 我们瞧瞧哦 一个大灌篮
1:31:34 Michael. 迈克尔
1:31:36 Can I talk to you for a minute? 我能和你聊几句么
1:31:39 What? 什么事?
1:31:41 -You'll see. -Duke, get in the house. -等会就知道了 -杜克到屋子里去
1:31:43 Baby, did you see that boy's skills? 宝贝儿 你有没有看见这孩子的技巧?
1:31:45 If I keep on-- 要是我继续
1:31:46 What's wrong, baby? What's up? 怎么了 宝贝儿出什么事了?
1:31:48 Your work just called. 刚刚有公事电话找你
1:31:50 And I thought it might be an emergency, so I picked up. 然后我以为是什么紧急事件 就替你接了
1:31:54 But it was just your mom. 只不过那其实是你妈
1:31:55 Really? You know, the T-Mobile Top Five be acting up-- 怎么会你知道电话公司 老是会串线什么的嘛…
1:31:58 Don't bullshit me, Michael. 别和我瞎扯迈克尔
1:32:00 Baby, listen, I know how that looks, but trust me, this isn't-- 宝贝你听我说 我知道这看上去很糟 可你要信任我 这不是…
1:32:02 Trust? I believed you. 信任 我相信过你
1:32:05 I can't compete with your mother. And I won't. 只不过我没办法和你妈相比 我也不愿意那么做
1:32:08 You don't have to-- 你不用和她…
1:32:10 Then why did you look me in my face and lie? 那你为什么可以当着我的面说谎?
1:32:15 You need to go. 你得走了
1:32:17 Baby, listen I-- 宝贝 你听我说
1:32:19 Get out of my face, Michael. 快给我离开 迈克尔
1:32:28 And Candace wasn't the only one who was all business that day. 而康蒂丝也不是 那天唯一把事情说清楚的一个 美人儿你好
1:32:33 -Hi. -How are you? -嘿 -你好吗?
1:32:36 -I have a 2:00, so-- -You look stunning. -我2点还约了人 所以… -你看上去美极了
1:32:39 Thank you. 谢谢
1:32:41 So you said you had some news? 你要和我说什么事?
1:32:43 Yeah. My investor friend that I told you about? 对 记得我和你说过 我有一个做投资人的朋友吗?
1:32:46 Read your prospectus, loves it, and wants you to give him a call. 他看了你的计划书 很喜欢 然后想让你给他个电话
1:32:50 You serious? 你说真的?
1:32:51 I told you it was brilliant. 我跟你说过那份计划书很棒了
1:32:54 Thank you, thank you, thank you. 谢谢你 谢谢
1:32:57 Okay, we gotta go celebrate. Let's go out tonight. 好啊 我们要去庆祝 今晚就出去吧
1:33:00 I'm not free tonight. 我今晚有事情
1:33:02 Okay, well, what about tomorrow night, then? 没事啊 那明晚怎么样?
1:33:05 Dominic, I'm gonna hit you with the headline, okay? 多米 我就和你直说了好吗?
1:33:07 I recently reconnected with an ex-boyfriend of mine from college. 我最近和我大学里的前男友 重新联络上了
1:33:11 Anyway, he just got a divorce and is moving back to L.A. and I-- 他刚离婚然后准备搬回来 所以我…
1:33:15 You breaking up with me? 所以你要和我分手
1:33:17 No! No, I'm not breaking up, just taking a break. 不是 不是分手 就是暂停一下
1:33:20 -I need some space. -Space. -我需要一些空间 -空间
1:33:22 -Yeah, because we were moving too fast-- -Yeah, you sound like a guy. -是啊 因为我们进展得太快了 -是啊 你听上去就像个男人
1:33:25 What did you say? 你说什么?
1:33:26 I said you sound like a guy. 我说你的口气像个男人
1:33:28 Is that why you invited me to this place? For a business lunch? 所以你才和我约在这里谈是么? 就像公务会餐一样?
1:33:32 So you can have an out-time? Dominic, look, I really like you. -然后就可以和我暂停一下 -听着多米 我真的很喜欢你
1:33:35 Okay? I didn't want to string you along. Let's just be friends. 好吗? 我不想一直拖住你 我们还是做朋友吧
1:33:40 Yeah, I don't really need any more friends, Lauren. 是吗 可我不是很需要更多朋友劳伦
1:33:42 You know, and I really don't need your friends to let me down easy. 其实吧 我真的不需要 你朋友给我行什么方便
1:33:47 Okay, don't be stupid, Dominic. That's business, not personal. 多米尼克别犯傻 生意归生意 你别感情用事
1:33:52 Do you even know the difference? 那你知道它们的区别吗?
1:33:54 You know, Lauren, I-- 知道吗 劳伦 我…
1:33:56 I never even had a prospectus, you know? I did it all to impress you. 我以前甚至都没有做过计划书 这种东西 你知道吗 我做的那些事情都是为了你
1:34:02 You inspired me, you motivated me to do something for myself for the first time. 是你激励了我鼓舞了我 让我第一次想要自己动手去努力做事
1:34:08 And all this time, I thought you were too good for me. 一直以来我还以为是你太优秀 我配不上呢
1:34:26 Kris? Picked up some pizza. 克里斯 在家吗 我带了点批萨回来
1:35:01 What I don't get is just like the book, I was the guy with potential. 我不明白的是就像那书里说的那样
1:35:06 I told her the truth, I put myself out there, and it still wasn't enough. 我是个潜力股 还和她开诚布公坦白了一切 这还不够么
1:35:09 At least you didn't get caught in a flat-out lie. 至少你没有撒了个弥天大谎 还给戳穿了
1:35:11 Y'all should see how bad things are with Candace right now. 你们都该看看我现在 和卡丹之间有多糟糕
1:35:14 Kristen wouldn't even look at me when I showed up at Gina's. 我去吉娜家找克里斯汀的时候 她连正眼都不瞧我
1:35:17 She'll change her mind. 她会回心转意的
1:35:19 Nah. You did not see the way she looked at me. Such-- 不会的 你那是没看见当时 她看着我的眼神 是那么的
1:35:22 -Hate? -Hurt. -充满恨意 -是那么地受伤
1:35:24 It's hate. Women will hate you fast. 那是忿恨 女人总是恨你更多一点
1:35:27 Either way, fellas. I think we brought this upon ourselves. 不管怎样 伙计们 我觉得这是我们自找的
1:35:30 It was self-defense. They attacked first! We had to strike back. 那是正当防卫好么 -是她们先出招的 我们得回击啊 -没错
1:35:34 We were just protecting our natural-born right to be men. Am I right? 我们只是在捍卫自己 与天俱来的男性权益不是吗?
1:35:37 -Right. -Right. -对头 -对
1:35:38 Love us or leave us, right? 不够爱我们就走人嘛 是吧?
1:35:40 Right! 就是
1:35:41 And they left us. 所以她们就抛弃我们了
1:35:44 Right. 是啊
1:36:28 -We're back. -Take all the time you need. -我们又来啦 -随便看多久都行
1:36:31 Thanks. 谢谢
1:36:39 Zeke, check it out. 齐克 快看
1:36:41 Your right. My left. 你右边我左边
1:36:49 Not my type. 不是我的菜
1:36:51 That's how we do it, Zeke. I line them up, you mow them down. 我们一直这么做的啊 齐克 替你整好队形 你全部搞定啊
1:36:56 Can I have my tab? 还是把账单给我吧
1:37:16 -You can only get it once a year. -What kind of meat is in the McRib? 一年才能吃到一次 这麦肋排到底是什么肉啊
1:37:19 -Fellas. -Let me guess... 兄弟们 我来猜猜
1:37:20 ...school pictures? 学校照相日
1:37:21 You look like a substitute teacher. 你看上去像个代课老师
1:37:24 I finally sent my résumé over to Neversoft. I had my meeting today. 我终于还是把简历投给了威软公司 今天去面试过了
1:37:29 And they just called. I got the job. 刚才他们打电话给我 我拿到那份工作了
1:37:32 -Is that right? -Congratulations, man! -真的? -恭喜啊 兄弟
1:37:34 I'm a senior designer at Neversoft. With full benefits. 我现在是那里的高级设计师了 有全套福利呢
1:37:37 Damn right, and the next step is the expense card. 这就对了 下一步就是要办好消费卡
1:37:39 I gotta call Kris. 我要打给克里斯汀
1:37:42 She not talking to you, huh? 她还是不和你说话吗?
1:37:44 -No. -Well, you should call her anyway. -是啊 -可你总得要打给她的
1:37:47 She's the reason it happened, right? 没有她你不会去找工作 不是么?
1:37:49 Yeah. -是啊 -这建议真不错
1:37:51 That's good advice, right there. How's that project going along? -是啊 -这建议真不错 你的那个计划进行得怎么样了
1:37:53 It's going great. In fact... 进展得一切顺利 事实上 我就要走了
1:37:54 ...I'm gonna have to get out of here soon and go get some work done. 进展得一切顺利 事实上 我就要走了 然后去把一些活儿干完
1:37:57 You know what we should do? We should celebrate, right? 知道我们在该干吗吗? 我们应该要庆祝一下是吧
1:38:00 -Nice. Yes. -New job, first round's on Michael. -好棒啊 知道啊 -迈克尔的第一个工作
1:38:02 -Yes. I like that. -No, no. I just had the last round-- -好 我同意 -不要 我刚刚请了上一轮
1:38:05 -This is nice, just the fellas. -Just like old times. -这样很好啊 就我们兄弟几个 -就好像以前的美好时光
1:38:08 No, it's not like old times because I don't have a curfew this time. 才不像以前呢 因为现在我没有宵禁时间啦
1:38:11 Speaking of curfew, I gotta go. My night to cook. 说到回家时间 我得走了 今天该我做晚饭了
1:38:14 Bennett, you sound like a bitch. 版纳德 你怎么像个娘们儿
1:38:15 We just got finished hearing good news, we with the fellas, we drinking. 我们这不刚听到这么多好消息么 和兄弟们在一起喝一杯多好
1:38:18 He running home all henpecked. Come on, man! 可他却妻管严似的飞奔回家 别这样啊 兄弟
1:38:21 I'm not cooking because I have to, I'm cooking because I want to, that's my wife. 我不是因为没办法必须才煮饭 我是自己想做饭 给我太太吃啊
1:38:24 Come on, now, Bennett. 我说 版纳德
1:38:25 I'm not saying it like that, I'm saying just, right now-- 我不是…我不是那个意思 我就是说现在这会儿
1:38:27 Don't be mad at me because I got a wife at the house. 别因为我家里有老婆等着就生我气嘛
1:38:29 That means sometimes I can't hang out all night with you guys. 即使那意味着 我不能整晚和你们一起混
1:38:31 I gotta go home early then that's what I gotta do. 我得早回家去 可我愿意那样
1:38:34 I'm just saying. 我就这么一说
1:38:36 I got this round. 这轮我请吧
1:38:38 -I'm happy for you, congratulations. -Thank you. -恭喜兄弟 真为你高兴 -谢啦
1:38:40 -I'll see you guys. -Big B! -回见了各位 -再见了大块头
1:38:42 You're $20 short, Bennett. 少给了20呢 版纳德
1:38:44 Yeah, no, I used to cook for Gail on Thursdays. That was my day. 我以前每周四都会给卡尔下厨 那是我的料理日
1:38:48 I'm happy we're free. I really am. 我很高兴我们都是自由身 真心高兴
1:38:50 I'm telling you right now, we're better off without them. 告诉你们吧 没有她们我们过得更好
1:38:52 Yeah, I mean, who needs to put up with their shit? 是啊 谁愿意老是受她们的气啊
1:38:54 And their demands, the nagging-- 各种要求 各种唠叨
1:38:56 The expectations. Expectation is the catalyst for all of that. 还有各种期待 而期望什么的就是一切麻烦的催化剂
1:39:00 -Here we go. -You know what's funny? -来喝 -你们知道哪里才是最可笑的么?
1:39:01 Gail used to love it when I cooked Bolognese sauce from scratch. 卡尔以前最爱吃我自己做的意式肉酱
1:39:05 Like, that was her favorite, so-- 那就像是她的最爱
1:39:06 All right, boys, we are free to do whatever we want... 好了 兄弟们 我们现在可以随心所欲了
1:39:09 ...with whoever we want, whenever we want, all right? To freedom! 想和谁一起在什么地方干些什么 都随我们了 敬自由一杯
1:39:13 Freedom! 敬自由一杯
1:39:22 Ced, lift your glass, man, get involved. 赛德 举杯啊 要跟上组织
1:39:24 -Right, I'm sorry. No, no, no. -Take that shot, baby. 对对 不好意思啊 抱歉 把你那杯喝了
1:39:26 To freedom. 敬自由一杯
1:39:29 Bottoms up. 干了
1:39:32 Don't need them. 才不需要她们呢
1:39:34 I gotta piss. 我要上小号去
1:39:36 I'll be right back. 马上回来
1:39:37 Look like you gotta take a dump, the way you moving. 你看上去怎么像是要去上大号呢
1:39:47 What? Gail, ain't nobody calling to fight with you right now. -又怎么了? -卡尔 我不是打来和你吵架的
1:39:50 -What the hell do-- -Look! I'm coming home. -那你他妈… -听着听着 我要回家来
1:39:53 Really, Cedric? 真的假的 赛德?
1:39:54 Gail, let me tell you something. That's my house too, Gail! 盖儿 我告诉你吧 那也是我的家 那房子的水电账单都是我付的好嘛
1:39:57 I pay the bills in that house! It's my house too. I'm coming home. 盖儿 我告诉你吧 那也是我的家 那房子的水电账单都是我付的好嘛 那也是我的家 我要回家来了
1:40:01 Which is where I belong, girl. 那也是我的心之所属啊宝贝
1:40:04 Gail, I'm tired of this tough shit. I miss you, Gail. 卡尔 我受够了这些倒霉事了 我想你了 卡尔
1:40:09 Gail, I ain't been the same, man. 盖儿 我都折腾得和以前不是一个人形了
1:40:10 I'm out here, I'm out here on these streets and shit. 我混在外面 老是晃在外面无事生事
1:40:14 I'm out here in the strip clubs. 我还混去了脱衣舞俱乐部
1:40:16 These girls calling me by my first name, like, I'm there every day! 那里的姑娘都直呼我的名字 搞得好像我天天泡在那里似的
1:40:20 Which I am, but that's because I'm going through something, Gail. 虽然我的确是啦 可那也是因为我正在困难时期嘛 卡尔
1:40:23 I need to be held. I need you to rub my back. Put me in my onesie. 我需要有人支撑 我想要你给我揉背 给我穿上连体睡衣
1:40:27 I changed, I need my woman back! 我改好了 我想要重回自家女人的怀抱
1:40:29 I'm around all these men and shit! 我受够老和一群臭男人 还有一堆破事在一起了
1:40:31 I don't want it. I don't want that life no more, I want you and Jesus. 我受够老和一群臭男人 还有一堆破事在一起了 我再也不想要过那种生活了 我只想要你还有老天
1:40:35 -And that's it. -Okay, Big Daddy. -就足够了 -好吧 大乖乖
1:40:38 What you say? 你说什么?
1:40:40 How soon can you get here? 你多久才能到家?
1:40:47 Like-- Like 20, 22, 23 minutes. 大概 也就20 22 或者23分钟吧
1:40:49 Bring your sexy ass home. I'll be waiting. 那你就快给我风骚的扭回家吧 -等你哦 -要我顺路捎点什么东西么?
1:40:52 You want me to bring you something? You want some Doritos, or something? -等你哦 -要我顺路捎点什么东西么? 你要不要带点薯片或者别的什么?
1:40:55 Because I can stop and get it, baby. Whatever makes you happy. 没关系我可以顺路给你买的宝贝 只要你开心就好
1:40:58 -Just come home. -Okay. -你回家就好 -那好
1:41:00 All right, I love you. 好的 我爱你
1:41:04 Oh, shit. 太好了
1:41:06 Thank you. 谢谢您
1:41:10 Yup. 是的
1:41:21 Good shit, brother. Go home to Gail. 太好了兄弟 快回家找卡尔去吧
1:41:30 He just wipe shit on my back? 是不是把屎擦我背上了?
1:41:35 You didn't even wash your hands, man? 都不知道便后要洗手的吗 兄弟?
1:41:38 Who the hell shits with a hat on, anyway? 你那帽子算他妈的是什么玩意儿嘛
1:41:41 -She said she was coming from Shanghai. -I remember her. 她说她是从上海回来的 我记得她
1:41:45 Fellas, I will see you later. 弟兄们 回见了
1:41:47 Let's all cash out, we'll go together. You going to the Ass Factory, right? 那我们都结账走吧 大家一起走 你是要去美臀工厂对吧?
1:41:50 Gail is taking me back, I'm going home. 卡尔允许我回去了 哥我要回家了
1:41:53 Home! 回家!
1:41:54 Girl, I am married. Please! 姑娘 人家是已婚人士好么 拜托
1:41:57 Thank you. Married man! 谢谢您了 已婚人士
1:41:58 That night, we all realized that the plots... 那一晚 我们都明白了所有的
1:42:02 ...plans and schemes couldn't compare to one simple thing, the truth. 密谋 诡计 策划什么的都比不上 一样简简单单的事 那就是现实真相
1:42:14 Mama! Oh, what the hell? -妈妈 -搞什么情况?
1:42:16 Hey, baby. 宝贝儿 你好啊
1:42:18 Oh, flowers, breakfast. Yeah. 宝贝儿 你好啊 有花有早餐 好棒啊
1:42:21 You're a little early, sweetie. 你来得有点早啊亲爱的
1:42:23 I know, but I wanted to come by so I could tell you that... 我知道 可我就是想要过来和你说件事儿
1:42:26 ...I'm not gonna be able to make it to the anniversary today, Mom. 妈妈 今天我没办法陪你去周年纪念了
1:42:29 There's some place I gotta be. 我有个地方要去
1:42:30 Well, it's our 75th at the church. 可那是我们第75次礼拜
1:42:34 What's wrong, sweetie? Where you gotta be? 有什么事情 亲爱的 你要去哪里来着?
1:42:36 With Candace. At her family reunion, Mom. 去卡丹那里 参加她们家的家庭聚会
1:42:45 Well, good for you. 是嘛 挺好的
1:42:48 Okay, sweetie. 那就去吧 宝贝
1:42:50 -Really? -All right. -真的 -是的啦
1:42:51 Now, I'm gonna see you tomorrow, okay? Time for you to go. 那我们明天再见了 行吧 你得快点走了
1:42:53 Loretta, it's my turn to spank you. 洛雷塔该轮到我来打你了
1:42:57 Deacon Johnson? 约翰逊执事?
1:42:58 -You got the keys for these? -Put those down, fool! -你有这玩意儿的钥匙吗? -把手放下你个蠢货
1:43:01 How long has this been going on? 你们俩这是开始多久了
1:43:02 Ninety days. 90天了
1:43:04 More like 91. I'm sorry I stretched your T-shirt. 其实有91天了 把你衣服绷大了 不好意思
1:43:06 How you doing, Michael? 你还好吗 迈克尔?
1:43:08 -All right, fool, go on upstairs now. -You know, these pills cost $19. 行了蠢蛋 快给我上楼去 要知道小药丸可是要19美元啊
1:43:11 Mom, you got him with my loofah? 妈妈 你还让他用我的丝瓜巾
1:43:13 Baby, go on. Go ahead, go ahead. 宝贝去吧 快去
1:43:15 Listen here, fool! 你个呆子给我听好
1:43:17 I done told you I'd bring that coffee upstairs, you old, nasty fool. 我都说烦了 你个老梆瓜蠢蛋 我会把那咖啡拿上来的
1:43:22 Look who I found. 看看我碰见了谁
1:43:25 Okay, third time I hope is a charm. 好吧 我希望事不过三是好事啊
1:43:27 Actually, I think it is. 事实上 我想说是的
1:43:28 -Go ahead, tell them. -We want to make an offer. -说吧 告诉她们 -我们想要报个价
1:43:31 -I told you this was gonna happen. -No, you didn't, actually. -我早告诉你这事儿能成的 -才没有
1:43:34 This is great news. We sort of had an instinct about you guys. 这真是个好消息 我们其实多少 在心里对你们是有点预感的
1:43:39 Jeremy, what are you doing here? -克里斯汀? -杰里米 你到这里来做什么?
1:43:41 I need to talk to you. 我得和你谈谈
1:43:42 Yeah, I can't. I'm in the middle of something. 不行 我这正有事
1:43:44 This is important. 可我要说的事情很重要
1:43:46 Not a problem. Take your time. 没问题啊 你们慢慢聊
1:43:48 I'm gonna get the paperwork, and we can get started. 我去准备书面文件 然后我们就能开始洽谈了
1:43:50 I'm really sorry. 我真的很抱歉
1:43:54 Did someone die? -有谁死了么 -什么 不是
1:43:55 -What? No. -Well, you have a suit on, so I-- -有谁死了么 -什么 不是 可你穿着身西装 我就以为
1:43:58 I got the job at Neversoft, Kris. 威软 那份工作我拿到了 克里斯汀
1:44:00 -Really? -Yeah. -真的吗? -是啊
1:44:02 I mean, that's cool. I hope you didn't do it for my benefit. 我是说这挺不错的 希望你别是因为我才那么做的
1:44:06 I did. At first. 一开始的确是
1:44:08 But somehow, through all the pretending... 可后来不知道怎么的 演着演着
1:44:13 ...I figured out I wanted it for me. 我好像慢慢明白了 这其实也是我自己想要的
1:44:16 And now that I have it, I want it for us. 而现在我拿到了这份工作 我明白我是为了我们俩争取的
1:44:19 You were the first person I wanted to call when I got the news... 我一收到消息第一个 就想打电话告诉你
1:44:22 ...and the fact that I couldn't drove me crazy. 可我却不能打给你 那快把我逼疯了
1:44:26 You're the last person I think about before I go to sleep at night, Kris. 每晚在入睡前 你是我脑海里念着的最后一个人
1:44:29 Look... 听我说…
1:44:31 ...I miss you. 我好想你
1:44:32 Oh, honey. 哦 宝贝你看
1:44:34 I miss you and I want you back. 我非常想你 而且我希望你能回到我身边
1:44:37 So sweet. 太甜蜜了
1:44:39 I want to buy you a house. 我想给你买一幢房子
1:44:41 That's my man, step up there. 这才像话嘛 兄弟 雄起啊
1:44:42 I want to buy you this house. 我想给你买这幢房子
1:44:44 Back up, bitch. You ain't buying my house. 给我收手贱人 你可不许和我抢房子
1:44:46 Oh, it's fine. 没事的
1:44:47 How the hell he talking about buying my house? 这家伙说什么要买我的房子?
1:44:49 Breathe. 深呼吸
1:44:50 I'm breathing, I'm breathing. I got it, I got it. 我呼了 我没事
1:44:54 Okay. 好吧
1:45:08 I want to be your wife. And I want you to be my husband-- 我想成为你的妻子 也希望你能做我的丈夫
1:45:16 I want to be your husband. 是我要做你的丈夫
1:45:19 And I want you to be my wife... 而想要你做我的妻子
1:45:21 ...so bad. 太想了
1:45:23 So... 那么…
1:45:36 ...will you marry me? 嫁给我好么?
1:45:41 It's a yes. 是个肯定回答
1:45:43 -Oh, she did it. -Go ahead, my man. -哦 她成功了 -上吧 少年
1:45:45 She did it because she changed the game. 因为她改变了游戏规则所以成功了
1:45:47 -She did what? -Don't worry about it. -她做什么了? -没什么没事
1:45:58 Even Zeke was singing a new tune. 甚至是齐克都改过自新了
1:46:00 That last one was Bitch Betta Have My Money by AMG. 刚才那首是 《女孩最好还钱来》
1:46:03 I don't really feel like being out of the house right now. 我最近其实真的不想外出
1:46:04 Come on. You know the best way to get over an old guy is to get a new one. 得了吧 忘掉旧爱最好的方法就是结识新欢
1:46:10 -You're coming. -...make sure you show him some love. -你已经来了啊 -希望大家给他一些鼓励
1:46:12 Zeke, come on up. 齐克 请上台来吧
1:46:15 -Hey, thank you. -Oh, my God. -嘿 谢谢 -哦 天啊
1:46:17 I haven't really played this song in years... 我已经很多年 没有好好弹过这首歌了…
1:46:19 Is that-- 那不是…
1:46:20 ...but it was inspired by a very special woman who... 但有一位姑娘鼓励了我…
1:46:25 ...is definitely worth waiting for. 对我来说 她是非常特别的 值得等待的人
1:46:30 Last night I had a dream about a dream 昨晚我做了个梦中梦
1:46:34 About you 关于你
1:46:40 -I gotta get out of here. -Mya! -我得走了 -玛雅!
1:46:43 Mya! 玛雅!
1:46:47 Mya, will you hold up? Mya? 玛雅 你就等一下好吗?
1:46:50 You think you can just sing one song and everything's gonna be forgotten? 你是不是觉得只要唱首歌 就可以往事不提
1:46:53 No! I was just hoping it would be a start. 没有 我只希望这能成为一个开始
1:46:56 You know what? You know, you can't change a person's nature, Zeke. 你知道吗 齐克 江山易改 本性难移
1:46:58 That is not true. I know for a fact that that's not true. 不是那样的 我发誓不是那样
1:47:00 -How? -Because I want to start over. -凭什么? -因为我想重新来过
1:47:03 I want 90 more days. 我想和你重新相处90天
1:47:06 Without sex? 不谈性
1:47:07 If that's what it takes. 如果那是你答应和我重新来过的条件
1:47:10 I don't want the sex, Mya. I want you. 我不需要性 玛雅 我想要的是你
1:47:12 That's bullshit. 全是鬼话
1:47:16 Okay, that's bullshit. Yes! Of course I want the sex. 那的确是鬼话 是的 我当然想要跟你上床
1:47:18 But the difference is the sex is all I wanted before I met you. Now... 但不同是在我遇见你之前 我脑子里只有把妹骗上床 而现在…
1:47:22 ...I want you. Okay? 我只想要你 你懂么?
1:47:26 Now? I want coffee. 而现在呢 我只要和你喝喝咖啡就足够了
1:47:30 I want to stay up all night talking about your crazy childhood. I want-- 我想整晚整晚的听你谈 你疯狂的童年轶事 我还想…
1:47:35 I don't know. I want to talk about Aristotle's Caves. 我也不知道怎么说 我还想和你聊聊亚里士多德的洞穴
1:47:42 It's Plato's. 是柏拉图的
1:47:44 Plato got caves too? 柏拉图也有洞穴
1:47:46 Yeah. 是啊
1:47:48 Mya, I love you. 玛雅 我爱你
1:47:51 I'm in love with you. 我深深地爱上你了
1:47:56 I've never said that to anyone in my life. 这些话 我以前从未对任何人说起过
1:48:02 Then why didn't you just say so? 那你刚刚干吗不这么说出来
1:48:19 Turns out that my epiphany had a domino effect. 结果看来 我之前的顿悟产生了 多米诺效应
1:48:22 Everyone was actually stepping up with their women. For real this time. 所有人都跟自己心爱的姑娘 有了真正的 实质性的进展
1:48:26 I didn't get any of this. 这个我一点都没吃过
1:48:30 Candace? Your mother tells me that you're still single. 卡丹? 你妈妈告诉我 你现在还是单身
1:48:33 Don't worry about it, because I think I have a solution. 别担心 我已经给你想好办法啦
1:48:36 I have somebody I think would be perfect for you at my office. Her name is Amy. 我认识个跟你非常般配的人 是我办公室的 -她的名字叫艾米 -她 她可不是拉拉国的
1:48:40 Her? She's not in that chapter. -她的名字叫艾米 -她 她可不是拉拉国的
1:48:42 Well, she might want to read the book, honey. 好吧 亲爱的 她真应该读读那本书
1:48:44 Mom! Mom! 妈妈
1:48:46 Thanks, Duke. I got this. 谢啦 杜克我能搞定
1:48:49 -Hi, ladies. -Look at that face! -女士们 大家好 -看看那张小俊脸
1:48:52 Nice to see you all. 很高兴见到你们
1:48:54 What are you doing here? Isn't today your mom's church thing? 你来这儿干什么 今儿不是要陪你妈上教堂吗?
1:48:57 Yeah, it is. 对啊 是今天
1:48:58 So, what, did it get canceled? 所以 怎么 行程取消了
1:48:59 It did not. What's up with all these damn questions, woman? 才没有 怎么啦 妞儿 哪儿来那么多问题呢?
1:49:02 I just thought you needed to be there. 我还以为你必须陪着你妈呢
1:49:04 Why would I be there when I should be here... 为什么我要在那儿呢 在我本该和我生命中
1:49:07 ...with the number-one woman in my life? 排第一位的女人在一起的时候
1:49:09 So since you're thinking so much... 所以说 既然你想这么多
1:49:11 ...why don't you think about putting a burger on that plate... 你怎么不想想拿个盘子 放上个汉堡
1:49:13 -...with some pickles and some mustard? -I'm sorry... 再抓些咸菜和芥末什么的 不好意思
1:49:17 ...did you just say "number one"? 你刚才是说"第一位"吗?
1:49:20 Oh, so you're not believing? Hold on one second. 哦 你还是不相信 等一下啊
1:49:23 Ladies and gentlemen? Excuse me? 女士们先生们 打扰一下啊
1:49:25 Hi, I need everybody's attention, please? Hey, everybody-- Yeah. 大家好 大家都请注意听我说 嘿大伙儿
1:49:29 Thank you. 谢谢大家
1:49:31 My name is Michael Hanover, and I want you all to know... 我的名字叫迈克尔 我想让每一个人知道
1:49:35 ...I am madly, and I am insanely in love with Candace Hall. 我疯狂的 无可救药的 爱上了卡丹哈尔
1:49:41 And I just want everybody in the world to know... 我希望世界上所有人明白
1:49:45 ...that she's the number-one woman in my life. 她才是我生命中第一重要的女人
1:49:48 Thanks, everybody. 谢谢大家
1:49:50 Now, back to the reunion! 继续聚会吧
1:50:00 Is that okay with you? 还有问题吗?
1:50:03 What do you want on your damn burger? 你想在那倒霉汉堡里夹什么?
1:50:05 I don't give a damn, girl. I came for you. Come here. 我才不管呢 姑娘 我是为你而来的 过来
1:50:15 And so the book ended happily for all of us. 因此 对我们来说 已经书写了圆满的结局
1:50:18 Well, almost all of us. 呃 是我们中的大部分人
1:50:21 Hey, girl. Haven't seen you in a while. 嘿 妞儿 好久不见
1:50:23 I know. I'm sorry, I've been swamped. 我知道 对不住啦 我最近忙死了
1:50:26 So, what are you up to later today? 那你待会儿准备干吗?
1:50:27 Actually, I have a date with James, finally. 其实我一会儿要和詹姆斯约会 终于啊
1:50:30 Between his CEO and my COO, it seems we never see each other. 他是个首席执行官 我们似乎就没有时间来得及好好相处
1:50:34 What else is new? 还有什么新鲜事?
1:50:35 Anyway. You got any plans for later? 没什么了 你待会儿有什么计划吗?
1:50:37 Actually, the three of us are going to Dominic's grand opening. 实际上 我们三个要去 应援多米的盛大开业
1:50:44 He found a backer for his restaurant? 他那餐馆找到赞助人了
1:50:46 No. He got a personal loan for a food truck. It's called-- 不是 他自己贷款买了辆餐车 名字叫“迪大道”
1:50:49 Avenue D. 名字叫“迪大道”
1:50:50 It's in Pueblo Plaza. He wants to start small, build his way up. 就在普韦布洛广场 他想先从小地方起步 再慢慢发展
1:50:54 Good for him, you know? 这挺好
1:50:57 -Anyway, have fun tonight. -Oh, we will. -总之 今晚玩得开心 -哦 那当然
1:51:03 Thank you. 谢谢
1:51:05 So, James, how was your day? 那么 詹姆斯你今天过得怎么样?
1:51:06 It was good. Actually, it was-- It was great. 挺好 实际上 非常好
1:51:09 Did I mention to you that The Wall Street Journal is doing a feature on me? 我跟你说过华尔街日报 要给我做个专题吗?
1:51:12 -Yes, the-- -"Wonderkid." Yeah, I know. -知道 -神奇小子 哈哈
1:51:15 "The Wonderkid." 神奇小子
1:51:16 I know I'm not exactly a kid... 你看我已经不是小子了
1:51:17 ...but I am the youngest CEO of a Fortune 500 company. 但我是财富500强里 最年轻的首席执行官
1:51:20 Yes, we talked-- Now I'm focusing my sights on the Far East. -对啊 我们谈起过 -现在我正着眼于远东地区
1:51:23 I was talking to Warren the other day. You know Warren Buffett? 几天前我跟沃伦谈过了 你知道巴菲特吗?
1:51:26 Dub-Beezy, that's my man. 迪巴 我哥儿们
1:51:28 He was telling me about diversification. 他告诉我要分散投资
1:51:32 So I bought a G6. Okay, all right. The company bought a G6. 所以 我买了架G6 好吧 其实是公司买了架G6
1:51:37 New York to Los Angeles costs about $60,000. 从纽约到洛杉矶要六万美元
1:51:38 They put that down every time I go. 这样每次我来就顺路了
1:51:40 Also talked to my man, Kobe, the other day. 哦 还跟我哥儿们科比谈过了
1:51:41 He was trying to get me to buy an NBA franchise. 他想让我买个NBA的专营权
1:51:44 I'm fine, James. 我很好 詹姆斯
1:51:48 Thanks for asking. 多谢关心
1:51:51 I'm sorry, I don't understand. 不好意思 我不懂你在说什么
1:51:53 I know. 我知道你不懂
1:51:57 I know, but I finally do. 我知道 你不懂 可我终于是想通了
1:52:09 All right, all right, all right. 好的
1:52:14 All right, a little something. 好吧 只是一点小意思
1:52:15 Just a little sample for the ladies. Fellas, I'll get you back later. 一些样品给女士们试吃 伙计们 回头再给你们拿啊
1:52:18 -Come on, Dom! -Give that to the wife. 不给力啊 多米 这份给这位太太
1:52:20 To your lady, okay, good, there you go. 这份给这位女士 好了
1:52:22 All right, one more? There you go, there you go, J. -就这样吧 -好嘞 还要一块 给你 拿好
1:52:24 I'll be right back. Thanks for coming. 我一会儿就过来 多谢捧场
1:52:26 -I'll be right back. -This is amazing. -一会儿就来 -太好吃了
1:52:30 Next! 下一个
1:52:32 I'll take the Chef's Special. 我想要大厨特色菜
1:52:33 Is that with chicken or-- 是加鸡肉的那款还是
1:52:35 -Hey, back of the line. -Look, this is personal, not business. 嘿 后边儿排队去 听着 这可是私事儿 不是做买卖
1:52:38 Move your arm! 起开点儿
1:52:41 Congratulations. 祝贺你
1:52:42 Looks like a huge success. 看上去非常成功
1:52:45 I wasn't expecting you. 我没想到你会来
1:52:47 I couldn't miss your grand opening. 我怎么会错过你的盛大开业呢
1:52:49 Live bass ceviche? 酸橘汁腌鲈鱼
1:52:50 Sal, those two lasagnas are to-go. 莎拉 那两份千层面打包
1:52:52 You got it. 知道了
1:52:55 So where's your CEO? 你的首席执行官呢?
1:52:56 I ended that. Dominic! 我叫停了
1:52:59 He may have all the money in the world, and all the power... 他也许赚了世界上所有的钱 拥有所有的权力
1:53:03 -...but he doesn't have half your potential. -Stop! -但他连你一半的潜力都没有 -得了吧
1:53:05 Stop. 别说了
1:53:07 I don't need you to do that for me anymore. I'm doing me, now. -我不需要你再这么做了 -我已经在自己动手努力了
1:53:10 All right? 好么?
1:53:12 Thanks for coming, but I got a business to run. 多谢捧场 但我还得做生意
1:53:14 I'm sure you can respect that, right? 我确信你能理解的 对吗?
1:53:18 -But I was-- -Next! -但是我 -下一个
1:53:25 What's good here, man? Do you have a low-fat Pork Special? 这儿有什么好吃的 你们有低卡的猪肉特色菜吗?
1:53:28 -Sure. -Let's roll with it. -当然有 -帮我卷起来
1:53:30 Dominic? 多米?
1:53:33 Excuse me. What are you doing? 稍等 你这是做什么?
1:53:35 I want you back, Dominic. 回到我身边 多米?
1:53:40 -Just give me a minute, please. I know. -We gotta finish this up. -伙计们 请给我们一点时间 -我们得先做完这菜啊
1:53:43 I'm sorry. 不好意思
1:53:46 -What are you doing? -I want you back. -你想干吗? -我想你回到我身边
1:53:49 Yeah, listen, I'm not an acquisition. You can't just decide-- 好 你听着 我不是你的所有物 你不能随便决定
1:53:51 -I'm asking. -Yeah? And I'm asking for some service. -我在请求你 -是吗 那我这儿还请求服务呢
1:53:54 You'll get your pork sausage, Porky! Beat it! 你会拿到那倒霉猪肉香肠的 猪肉仔 起开点儿
1:54:01 Lauren, listen, we're just too different, okay? 劳伦 听着 我们相差太远 好吗?
1:54:04 Yes, we are different. But I think that's a good thing. 是的 我们的确不同 但我觉得那是好事儿
1:54:07 What you need is status. You need titles. -你要的是地位 你要的是头衔 -不 我不在乎
1:54:10 -I don't care about-- -No, I don't. -我不在乎 -不
1:54:12 What I need is a man who makes me feel like I'm special. 我所需要的是一个 能让我感到自己很特别的男人
1:54:16 I don't care about his title... 我不在乎他的头衔
1:54:18 ...and I don't care how much money you make. 我也不在乎你挣多少钱
1:54:20 I don't care what kind of car you drive. I just need you. 我也不在乎你开的什么车 我就是需要你
1:54:24 Please? I'm sorry. 求你 我错了
1:54:30 I think ultimately we want different things. 我还是觉得最终 我们想要的东西不一样
1:54:32 No. 不对
1:54:34 I disagree. 我不同意
1:54:38 I think we want the exact same thing. 我觉得我们想要的东西是一样的
1:54:42 What's that? 是什么
1:54:44 Well, first... 首先
1:54:47 ...I would like to have my Chef's Special, hold the pork. 我想要主厨特色菜 有猪肉的那种
1:55:09 Go, Dom! All right, come on, man, that's enough kissing. 上啊 多米好哎 嘿伙计 亲够了没
1:55:12 -Grab her ass or something. -That's my girl! 摸摸她的屁股还是什么的 这才是我的好姑娘
1:55:14 Show me something, God! Give me something to think about tonight. 来点儿猛料 让我晚上有个念想
1:55:17 You know I haven't had much sex. 你知道我最近都没怎么做爱了
1:55:18 Me and Gail ain't really doing it like we used to. 我和卡尔都不像以前那么激情了
1:55:20 Really, Cedric? 你说什么 赛德
1:55:22 -Come on, now. -Get your little ass over here, now! -来吧 现在 -把你那小屁股挪过来 快点儿!
1:55:25 Hey, Gail, I was talking-- 嘿 卡尔我还没讲完呢
1:55:26 Pull your pants up, Cedric! 把你裤子拉好 赛德!
1:55:34 I'll get the guy in the purple. 我去跟那穿紫衣服的
1:55:36 -Hi, I'm Bennett. -Use our ball? -嘿 我是版纳德 -用咱的球
1:55:40 I'll see you on the court! Save it-- Save it for the game, though! 咱有种场上见 省省吧你 你给我省点力气留着比赛吧
1:55:43 Listen, little man. Where's your twin? 听着 小个子 你那胞弟呢?
1:55:45 You're gonna need somebody on your shoulders. 你得在肩膀上再架个人才够
1:55:46 That's funny. That's real funny. 真好笑 哦 真正好笑
1:55:48 Let's see if it's funny when my balls are on your back! 等我淡定地走你后门儿的时候 我看你还好笑不好笑
1:55:52 -Ball's in play. Let's go. -Oh, shit. -开始了 咱么走 -哦 该死!
1:56:00 Pass the ball, man! 传球啊 老兄
1:56:11 You gonna play some defense? 你得加强防守
1:56:14 Wait, wait, wait! 等等
1:56:15 Pass! 我过
1:56:20 Just shoot the ball. 赶快射篮吧你
1:56:24 You better get that out of here, little man. You all right? 小矮人 你最好赶紧离开吧 还好吧你?
1:56:27 Hey, no making fun. 嘿 别调戏我
1:56:33 Good shot. 好球
1:56:34 -Good shot? -It was! -好球 -的确是好球啊
1:56:36 -Bennett, be a man and push him! -It was a good shot. -版纳德像个男人推他 -那的确是个好球
1:56:54 Pick on someone your own size, man. 有种找比你个儿大的欺负
1:56:57 Oh, my knee! 哦 我的膝盖
1:57:08 Man, you better calm down. 哥儿们 你最好镇静点儿
1:57:10 He put his balls on my head. 他那个地方杵到我头了
1:57:17 Where's my help on defense? 我的侧防呢
1:57:23 Get out of here! 快滚蛋吧
1:57:26 Bennett! Jeremy! 版纳德 杰里米!
1:57:27 I'm trying to get my ball back! Can I have the ball, please? 我正准备去拿球 能拿回我们的球吗?
1:57:30 Just let them keep it. Let them keep it. 给他们吧 给他们吧
1:57:33 -Thanks, you guys! -Go get that. -谢谢 伙计们 -去拿你的球吧
1:57:35 Hey, we play here every Thursday. 嘿 我们每周四都在这儿打
1:57:37 That wasn't that bad. 没那么糟吧
1:57:39 Think about it. 想想看
1:57:41 Well, I think it was a good time. It's all about the exercise, guys. 我觉得挺好啊 不都是为了多运动嘛 伙计们